Posted by jay on June 29, 2002, at 17:03:16
This reminds me of some great Woody Alan stuff. Like, "If there is a problem...why can't the Higher Up tell me to my face???". Maybe I, who doesn't have a lot of Faith, needs to be much more imaginative. Man, when I was a little kid, I had an imagination that was just amazing! Maybe I shouldn't have tried to grow up so fast...or MAYBE, I didn't grow up, and am a man stuck in a boy's body.Looking up to an 'uncaring universe' in the stars, when you are so deeply suicidal, seems to have such mixed results. "What IS the meaning of this...what are You trying to do...was it something I said...something You'd like me to do?".
Maybe it's time for me to realize that praying isn't such a bad thing afterall. It's like I have lead a life of pure denial, just because I refused Faith. Any other Agnostics (or former) feel this way? Like everybody else has been let in on the secret, except me?
The Fatalistic Existentialist
jay
poster:jay
thread:269
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faith/20020527/msgs/269.html