Posted by Lou Pilder on August 17, 2013, at 17:12:34
In reply to Re: the big picture » Dr. Bob, posted by gardenergirl on July 9, 2013, at 16:34:05
> People are asking you for action, and you're giving them a process group. Imagine if a sports referee did that in response to questions about rules or complaints about a participant's actions. How could play continue?
>
> I don't recall anyone asking you to help them process their feelings about the behavior in question. You seem to be trying to get folks to change the way they react. As Dinah pointed out, you haven't answered the main question. You're saying this is exhausting, but good lord, you're making it so much bigger than is asked of you.
>
> My unsolicited suggestion is to keep it simple. Address the specific issue one way or another, or say directly that you are declining to. Boom, question answered.
>
> Then, if folks ASK you to help them process it, feel free. But frankly, assuming that's what is really being asked or perhaps that's what you feel is needed feels patronizing and a little insulting, at least to me.gg,
You wrote,[...their feelings about {the behavior in question}...].
Without knowing what posts you are referring to, I could be put in a false light so that readers could have hostile or disagreeable feelings induced against me and decrease the respect in which I am held. The behavior can be deduced to be what I as the subject person could be thought to be my posts here. My posts come from a Jewish perspective as revealed to me and I am following the prohibitions posted to me here by Mr Hsiung. You say that there are feelings about that behavior that people have. I would like for you to post some URLs to explain what you mean by that so that I could post my response to you.
Lou
poster:Lou Pilder
thread:1046456
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20130702/msgs/1049225.html