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Explanation

Posted by Deputy Dinah on December 27, 2007, at 14:21:07

In reply to Re: Please Be Civil » Deputy Dinah, posted by Phoenix1 on December 27, 2007, at 13:36:14

Saying "certain posters" isn't really a hypothetical, because it identifies particular posters as those being spoken of, even if the names haven't been given. In many cases, speaking of a poster or posters without giving a name actually opens the possibility of *more* posters feeling accused or put down since many may wonder if they are one of the posters being discussed.

A hypothetical also shouldn't be written in such a way as to identify any poster, since that really wouldn't be hypothetical either.

In this particular case, I think that a suggestion could be made without negatively characterizing posters actions. Saying that a thread is diverted is more neutral than saying it is hijacked. Saying that you believe frequency of posting is a problem on the board could be achieved without characterizing the value or lack of value of the contributions. Adding that something is your opinion does not automatically make it an "I statement". You might wish to read the links on "I statements" in the FAQ.

If you, in your imagination, substitute the name of the posters you haven't identified and believe that if you were that person and read the statement you would feel hurt, accused, or put down, it might be a good idea to review the contents of your post again. The same would also be true of any statements preceded by "In my opinion...".

I hope this helps clarify things some, and I'm sure Dr. Bob will be happy to correct anything I said in error.

Dinah, acting as deputy to Dr. Bob


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poster:Deputy Dinah thread:802756
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20071106/msgs/802932.html