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Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » partlycloudy

Posted by Dinah on May 23, 2005, at 9:24:16

In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members???, posted by partlycloudy on May 23, 2005, at 8:41:54

Well, obviously I agree.

But given that small boards are a given, which Dr. Bob has told us they are, wouldn't it be better if they were also private?

That way they'd be more like IM's or Babblemails or any number of the other private off board contacts that already take place. And there wouldn't be the feeling of pressing your nose against a window you can't breach, watching friends enjoy conversations you are not free to join, and knowing they like it that way. My mother, for all her flaws, always taught me not to do that. If I was having a conversation in public, and someone I knew wanted to join in (and all Babblers are someone we know, right?), the circle was to widen. If necessary the topic could change, and further private communications could occur... in private.

But long before the book, she taught me "You Can't Say You Can't Play". My son's school has it as a school rule. In fact you aren't even allowed to *talk* about events where not everyone is invited, like birthday parties, in public. And the first rule I ever heard in my son's kindergarten was "Whoever you're called to be with by the teacher, you are absolutely delighted to be with that person."

From page 99 of "You Can't Say You Can't Play" by Vivian Gussin Paley.

["It's a private time with you and your dad," I suggest.

"Right. And sometimes you have times like that with your friends."

"No one would argue with the privacy of those occasions," I say. "But does the classroom qualify as private or public?"

A boy answers. "If he or she is your good friend you can invite them to your house. So, no. this isn't a private place."]

So that's my limited aim. Since Dr. Bob is going to go ahead with something I think is not such a good idea, it at least seems acceptable if he identifies what is public and what is private.

We all know off board contact goes on. And it might hurt knowing that xxx and yyy are Babblemailing, if you never get Babblemailed. But it seems to me to be an entirely different thing if you were to see the contents of the Babblemails and either respond on Social, where you're allowed (I always feel like a voyeur when I do that with 2000), or feel like you're not able to respond at all. Like your input is not welcome, because you aren't a member of the group that is included in the conversation.

It's against what Babble's about to me. Where even if good friends are discussing mangoes, perfect strangers are always welcome to drop in on the thread and add their mango experiences.

 

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