Posted by alesta on October 24, 2004, at 22:17:54
In reply to Re: Are these not I statements? » alesta, posted by gardenergirl on October 24, 2004, at 16:35:38
hi, gg,
thanks for addressing me in the nice way that you did. :) i guess we'll just have to agree to disagree on this one..:)
I realize in therapy they emphasize "I statements" as a good way to help communicate to your partner in a nonoffending manner. I do think they can be a great tool for that purpose. But I think it is still possible to offend someone, even using these statements, if that is the intent. Good intent needs to work in conjunction with the "I statement." For instance, someone could have said to Mary, or whoever (this is just an example of how an "I statement" can be hurtful) "I hate stupid b*tches." this is definitely completely offensive. So, therefore, the "i statement" format does not guarantee that a statement will be nonoffensive. in sum, with good intent, i statements can help, but do not eliminate the possibility of offending.
Amy
poster:alesta
thread:406152
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20041012/msgs/406828.html