Posted by Noa on November 4, 2004, at 18:23:55
In reply to Re: That's what happens.... » Noa, posted by Shar on November 4, 2004, at 17:16:08
Yeah, there are things I like about this job. Also, I'm not feeling like I could undertake a job search as yet one more thing to do in addition to everything else, and I don't think I can afford to take the risk of leaving a job before having a new one. I'm gonna hang in there a while longer.
I have to say it didn't help that a number of people were quite distraught about elections. I myself had just tried to dissociate from it all (after voting) because I don't have the mental/emotional energy to really think about it. I went to bed early, without watching the coverage of the returns, and when I went to work the next day, I knew it was still undecided and then just didn't pay direct attention to it at all. But people were wanting to talk about it and some people were crying. So it became yet one more thing to try to stay clear of in order to keep from getting overwhelmed.
Today, I wish I had said something right away to deal with an interaction that really bothered me. A kind of whiny fellow employee (different department, but we have to collaborate on some projects) wanted to engage me in rehashing some stuff talked about at a meeting yesterday. Besides the fact that I would not want to have this conversation with her anyway, I was in the middle of about 100 different things and was in transit from one office to another, feeling stressed already. She kind of cornered me. I tried to just kind of give a quick response and excuse myself, and when I started to move away, she actually got hold of my shirt sleeve between her thumb and finger to kind of pull on me so I would stay and listen to her. I pulled myself free without addressing this directly, she said one more thing and I told her I really have to go do something and left. When I got back to my office, a close colleague saw that I was not happy and asked me about it and I vented to him. Then, getting busy with the rest of the day, I kind of forgot about it. But I brought it up in therapy tonight and realized how annoyed I am and wish that I had said something to address it right then.
I guess this happens sometimes, that all I want is to get out of a situation as fast as I can and if the other person gets even more intrusive with boundaries, I should call attention to it and set limits, but don't even think of doing that because I'm just h---bent on getting outta there.
Also, I think having someone tug on my shirt to hold me there is not the kind of thing I'm prepared for because it is pretty unexpected (being highly inappropriate office behavior!).
So now the question is whether I need to say something to her about it. I should have just dealt with it right away because the last thing I need now is to initiate another interaction with her.
poster:Noa
thread:410890
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20040626/msgs/411841.html