Posted by allisonm on June 16, 2003, at 20:02:59
Hi all. Sorry to bother with what might be a long post.
I will start from the start. A woman I will call Jennifer (not her real name) went to work at my dad's business when she was a teenager. He taught her all about motor repair that the business did. She did this for a number of years, but then became interested in running other parts of the business. She did expand somewhat into other areas (it is only a 3 or 4-person business). this woman has always held a grudge against me ever since we were children because I am an only child and she is one of 3. She complained that I was spoiled. My parents were divorced when I was 3. Jennifer's mom died in her teen years. Her father was a brutal man and chased her out of her house. She slept in a car she bought as a teen for a time, but also sometimes was allowed to sleep at her sisters' places. Jennifer has a prickly personality. She had her favorite customers and her unfavorite ones. The unfavored were not treated well. Nor did she treat my dad well ... yelling (shoting) at him in front of customers, etc... But he would take it.
She would quit at least once a year, but always came back.... there is more to this. Anyway, a few years ago, my dad, who had been badgering me to go into the family business for years and yuears, finally convinced me. I started. She immediately felt threatened because he gave me some of her former duties. It all was a disaster. She sabotaged my projects as much as she could, badmouthed me, etc. there were screaming matches over really stupid things such as whether she could paint faster than I could and certainly I couldn't because I was sitting on a 5 gal. bucket because I was lazy.... etc. real irrational stuff. but when you are surrounded by it, it becomes real. Hard to explain.
Anyway, she walked out. I told my dad "she's not coming back." but he hired her back, so I quit and was out of work for about 4 months. Then got a very good job... that was in the mid-1990s.
Jennifer has since quit and had 3 baby girls - two by a former boyfriend and one by another, which has always been a secret. She works part time and does odd jobs. And probably gets child support. Well, my cousin and I have seriously been considering getting into my dad's business. He's 76 and is tired and it's too much work for him to keep up with. Plus he keeps the place chronically understaffed, which is frustrating, but he doesn't like to spend money.
So my cousin and I have been talking for about 3 years now about how to go about this (with my father's blessings, etc.) Nothing has happened yet, but plans are under way to expand the business substantially so that it could support both my cousin and me.
Yesterday,. on father's day, I found out that Jennifer's youngest girl is my dad's daughter. He called it a "slight indiscretion." He says that nothing has changed between he and I and that he still loves me very much. (Well of course, he wants to see his business legacy continue.) I am hurting. I have nothing else to say. I just hurt inside. Ativan makes me spaced out, but if I don't take it, I find myself weepy and anxious.
My dad has been trying to contact me. I am avoiding him, but know something has to happen eventually. I don't know what to do.
Alli
poster:allisonm
thread:234431
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20030125/msgs/234431.html