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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Angela2 on June 14, 2014, at 16:01:24
I'm listening to an interview online today about mental illness. It's really good, and it makes me feel more clear and grounded about my own mental health issues and diagnosis.
I bought a dress online, I received it in the mail yesterday and it fits. and I like it!
I may not be poor anymore, for a little while.
I am reading a book called Grain Brain by David Perlmutter. It's good. It makes me want to cut out all carbs and grains and especially sugars! I ate some sour patch kids today. yum, lol.
Posted by alexandra_k on June 15, 2014, at 15:41:57
In reply to gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 14, 2014, at 16:01:24
congrats on the not being poor for a little while! i might have a small window of that coming up, too. it helps me feel... liberated. lighter. freer. options. yay :)
i never think to buy clothes online. partly because we get ripped off for shipping here and partly because i know i'd never return stuff if i didn't like it... and i have hard enough time selecting sizes appropriately when i do try stuff on in the store...
nice to have something new that you like, though.
i think it might be time for... new socks. it really is insane how happy new socks make me... i'm just... persistently aware of them for weeks. but i'd really like new sneakers to go with those... and i really need (honestly and truly) "Campbell's Biology" only it's crazy expensive and I hear that a new edition is due out for next year so probably I should wait...
Posted by Angela2 on June 15, 2014, at 20:53:45
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by alexandra_k on June 15, 2014, at 15:41:57
Is Campell's Biology a textbook? Wow you're a smarty!!
Posted by Angela2 on June 15, 2014, at 20:57:21
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by alexandra_k on June 15, 2014, at 15:41:57
Today I am grateful for
I've been reading some things on Facebook about Grain Brain might be bogus, and not supported by science. It makes me feel better, because I had a hunch that it was like a new fad diet book made for popularity and profit. Plus, I don't want to give up fruits or whole grains.
I spent some time with my family. My crazy family, lol.
I made a new music mix
I went for a long walk. It felt great.
Posted by alexandra_k on June 16, 2014, at 2:25:49
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 15, 2014, at 20:57:21
i love long walks! i will try and do one tomorrow if it is fine.
if i was a smarty i wouldn't need to read the book - ha!
but i love books, yes. and i learn a lot from them.
i had a nice time in the gym today. i thought about waves when i was doing the battling ropes... i thought about pendulums when i was trying to kick up to handstand. and i realized i don't know anything about either of those.
but i get the opportunity to learn. yay.
the chemistry website people... they have heaps more up there... physics stuff, too... and more chemistry stuff...
it is... odd... for me to be thinking of things sort of in pictures. a picture. with an equation. sort of... so simple, in a way. but so freaking hard to understand in the first place. i... enjoy it, yes. i guess i just have to hope that that means i'll get good at it at some point. perhaps... i won't. hurr.
Posted by Angela2 on June 16, 2014, at 19:41:23
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 15, 2014, at 20:57:21
Today I am grateful for painting. music. therapy. actually working on myself. It rained today. that was nice. the ac, since it's really kind of hot out. a print I ordered online came in the mail today. that was really nice.
Posted by alexandra_k on June 16, 2014, at 21:21:02
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 16, 2014, at 19:41:23
today i am grateful for...
my room / study space. as always :)
my calculator... which i am getting more used to...
for the opportunity to be able to focus on learning what i'm supposed to be learning. to... develop my focus. doing equations... is kinda fun in its own special way.
Posted by Angela2 on June 16, 2014, at 21:34:42
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by alexandra_k on June 16, 2014, at 21:21:02
What are you in school for? I forget!
Posted by alexandra_k on June 16, 2014, at 22:38:18
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 16, 2014, at 21:34:42
me too! ahahaha.
i guess i was hoping to do medicine or bio-medical science.
but i also like the thought of doing theoretical physicists or engineering or... well... who knows. i never did any science (or math) at high school... so... i thought i'd basically see what i enjoy / turn out to be capable of...
i am very lucky that i get disability... which means that i can study part time... that i don't need to take enough papers to make up a full time work load. that means i can take a course that i'm really not at all well prepared for (like general chemistry) and put a lot of time into learning things like... how to do simple unit conversions, scientific notation, how to read an equation, how to enter an equation into a calculator, how to do basic algebraic manipulation on an equation, how to interpret graphically represented relationships between variables...
it turned out that there is rather a lot of math in chemistry... ideal gas laws and enthalpies of reaction and rates of reaction and equilibrium constants and log scales... i am enjoying it a lot, but i'm also extremely grateful that i don't have 3 other courses to be juggling at the same time...
next semester: animal biology.
it was either that or plant biology and they said they recommended animal for people going on to pre-med / bio-med, so animal biology it is. we do stuff like... the digestive system of ruminants. stuff like that. get a bit of a head start on kinds of tissue...
next semester: conceptual physics (algebra, no calculus, no labs).
next year... pre-med is basically 'OY1' which consists in 'the overlapping 4' (organic chem, cell processes and development, human anatomy / physiology, population health) and... you choose 1 of two options for your other 3 papers (and everybody does a general ed). one pathway is bio-med (biology, bio-chem, physics) and the other pathway is health science (sociology / management crap about our health system). i'd really like to do bio-med (in case you hadn't guessed) - but it means i need to get the hang of enthalpy and co...
basically... i don't know that i can get the grades i need for entry if i do bio-med next year. health science would be an easier pathway for me (cr*pp*ng on about crap seems to be my speciality) but i'm sick of crap. i don't know that i'd last 5 minutes in medical school, anyway... i made a complete mess of my labs this semester... and i have an 'ick' response to people... i can do 'professional' but... we will be expected to play / grope at each other for years before they are expected to have any sort of professionalism about them... i think i could potentially like something like orthopedic surgery or er medicine... but it is years and years and years until you get to there and the skills are taught / expected to emerge up out of... labs. and the way labs are taught... i, uh, don't learn like that.
and, uh, this is probably a huge part of why the health system doens't really work for me. and a whole f*ck*ng bunch of people like me that are out there... and don't even get me started...
cr*pp*ng on about crap.
a simple model... a simple model of a simple machine... a person and their tool. and an equation. i think there is... relief. in something like that. efficiency. perfection. perhaps a high jump. or a throw. or a lift. years and years and years and years of training and dedication and sacrifice... and... it shows. meh.
Posted by alexandra_k on June 17, 2014, at 20:05:15
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by alexandra_k on June 16, 2014, at 22:38:18
9 days to the exam.
i am grateful for that. a lot of work... but can make a lot of manageable progress in that time... and then, uh, i'm done with chemistry for a bit.
i got to looking through the cell bio and development course book for next year... and feeling... inspired, i guess. remembering... when i went to meet with the convenor for biology and there was a bunch of different animal skulls in this display in the building. and i was like 'f*ck yeah!'... how cool is that? feeling excited about comparative animal biology...
looking through one of the bio-sci course books for next year... organ systems... yeah... that's the stuff i really want to be doing.
i will work hard over the next 9 days... calculations it is... i'm glad that i ended up enjoying the significant majority of the chemistry course... but i guess i'll also be glad to put this stuff behind me. for a bit... it will only come back later, of course... but keep it simple for next semester, again.
it occurred to me to apply for compassionate consideration for my lab grade this semester. i will do that. i wont' expect anything will come of it... but it will make my case for lab assistance greater. give a person a fish... vs teach them how to fish... etc. i need to remember i see the touchy feely worst of things with psychiatry (support workers mostly) and general practice (ditto, really)... the atmosphere in the bio-med year was... for the most part... well focused. i think... when people are respectful about backing off when i need them to... that i'm okay. and that i'll habituate over time... ? perhaps? anyway... keeping options open...
doing equations... glad that i'm not hating it / them. very glad, indeed.
Posted by Partlycloudy on June 18, 2014, at 9:29:06
In reply to gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 14, 2014, at 16:01:24
I am grateful that I am feeling well. I have a new pdoc sorted out.
I am more resilient than I thought.
I am finding that "working" on my social anxiety isn't feeling like work when I don't force it. I am getting out more and spending time with FRIENDS.
I am grateful for the roller coaster ride of moods and feelings and learning how to ride them out.
Posted by Angela2 on June 18, 2014, at 20:02:39
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Partlycloudy on June 18, 2014, at 9:29:06
Yay!!!!
Posted by Angela2 on June 18, 2014, at 20:12:03
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Partlycloudy on June 18, 2014, at 9:29:06
Today I illustrated my gratitude, but don't really have a good way of showing, since my digital camera is broken. But I'm grateful for that, because it was fun.
Someone rsvp'd to my meet up group outing this weekend, feeling special about that :)
Also, I did something nice for my neighbor which in turn, made me feel better. His father passed away, I had been putting off saying anything to him.. today I slipped a condolences and sympathy card from me in his mailbox. :)
I found my old curtains. They're really pretty, and I decided to hang them back up.
My friend is frustrated with me because of my avoid ant and non committal behavior. and backing out of stuff. But she wrote me a kind / steer / loving / and honest letter. It was a little hard to hear that she's frustrated with me, but I understand. I am grateful to have friends who are gentle and honest, and giving me a push here and there.
I am grateful for Psycho-babble
Night all :)
Posted by alexandra_k on June 20, 2014, at 0:07:29
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 18, 2014, at 20:12:03
so... my i-pod is gone. i hope whoever has it... gets something from it.
i have been discovering... a world without i-pod. for which i sort of... uh... sort of am grateful. i forget that i-pod becomes... eventually... something that i blast in most probably destructive ways. i'm possibly a little more paranoid about other people than i would be without it. time will tell... but i've actually enjoyed being a little more responsive to the world over the last day...
i am grateful for... having sort of properly realized that there is an easier option for me next year. and for finding some... acceptance of it. instead of thinking it was just too ick, which it seemed to be before...
i am grateful for coffee.
my house.
protein / chicken.my calculator. that i love it :)
for babble.
for... not turning out to be a criminal. i see... it could so easily have been a path for me... yet it has not... for... city mission turning out to be... more civilised than student health. for thinking that... working with the most disadvantaged... doesn't have to mean being involved with a big f*ck*ng mess of riff raff. clinician's. i mean.
Posted by Angela2 on June 20, 2014, at 19:55:49
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by alexandra_k on June 20, 2014, at 0:07:29
I'm kind of having a hard time being grateful today for some reason. Maybe it's just my energy. Because there's definitely things to be grateful for.
I am grateful for
I realized that I have obsessions. Obsessive tendencies. I obsess. And this was a really empowering realization for me, because suddenly things clicked. Like, Oh, THAT's what that is.I made a healthy dinner today. Zucchini, fried with onions and garlic in coconut oil. Then a blend of grains. yum.
I volunteered today, at the library. I am grateful for that.
Posted by baseball55 on June 20, 2014, at 20:33:55
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by Angela2 on June 20, 2014, at 19:55:49
I just moved out on my own and am grateful for my new place and grateful that I can afford a nice new place. I am having a housewarming/potluck tomorrow and am grateful to have friends who will come and visit and break in my new home.
My nephew is very ill and I am grateful that I can visit him and stay by his side. I am also grateful that my husband is visiting him too, even though we are separated and he is my brother's son.
I am grateful for dry, mid-70's, sunny weather. I wish it could last forever.
Posted by Angela2 on June 22, 2014, at 17:07:03
In reply to Re: gratitude today, posted by baseball55 on June 20, 2014, at 20:33:55
:)
This is the end of the thread.
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