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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 20 of 20. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
Is anyone interested in doing a mutual support sort of thing?
It's always been a problem for me, but even more so now with my planned reduced hours (and subsequent lack of medical benefits).
I could really use a support group - and Debtors Anonymous scared me silly. I went once and it was all I could do to keep from running out the door.
Posted by All Done on March 23, 2006, at 11:21:09
In reply to How many have spending problems?, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
I'm interested.
You know...as long as it doesn't cost anything. ;)
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:44:08
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » Dinah, posted by All Done on March 23, 2006, at 11:21:09
I think that would have to be a requirement. :)
Posted by verne on March 23, 2006, at 13:01:36
In reply to How many have spending problems?, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
I have a spending problem. I once was $33,000 in debt but it's now down to a manageable level.
In fact, my recent internet purchases have really stressed me out. I started out buying four large poof chairs (too many and wrong color) Bought covers - again wrong color. (looked nothing like the online sample) Returned them for a different color only to have them ship the same color back.
I need to stop making internet purchases while I still have one crippled nerve left.
Verne
Posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 16:56:57
In reply to How many have spending problems?, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
I have the complete opposite problem. I can't seem to spend money! It's extremely...and I mean extremely...stressful and anxiety producing to spend money on something.
I'll give you guys some of my money problems if you give me a taste of yours. I'd love to be able to buy something and not freak out about it. :-P
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 17:01:29
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems?, posted by verne on March 23, 2006, at 13:01:36
I am so impressed. Mine only gets worse and worse. My therapist keeps trying to convince me to give him a dollar figure, but I won't. Too much shame.
I'd rather talk about sex than money, especially how much I owe.
So.... I've consolidated my loans and am planning to reduce my credit card limits to just what I need from month to month for necessities. And cancel all but one card.
The trouble is limit creep. No matter how low you ask them to put it, they nudge it upwards. And if it's there, I'm likely going to spend it.
I really really hate myself about this. Particularly since it's what my mother does. Well, not quite, but close enough.
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 17:03:09
In reply to What about us scrooges?, posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 16:56:57
Well, I'd like better to be like my husband. He's just really really organized about money, but he does spend it if he's budgeted it.
But if I had to choose, I'd take being a scrooge. It doesn't leave you with the awful monetary hangover.
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 17:20:57
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » verne, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 17:01:29
Not only can you reduce your credit limit, but you can have them put something on your account to prevent automatic increases.
Posted by Phillipa on March 23, 2006, at 17:50:48
In reply to What about us scrooges?, posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 16:56:57
Meet my husband. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 18:34:27
In reply to Re: What about us scrooges? » thuso, posted by Phillipa on March 23, 2006, at 17:50:48
Dinah & Phillipa,
Interesting you both mentioned your husbands were also not as free with money. My guess would be that more men are tight with money and a majority of women like to spend money. I wonder what the statistics are for the opposite. How many women are like me? (btw...I'm a girl) And how many men are like you guys?
At least for me, it was a mix of my type-A personality and the fact that both my parents are absolutely HORRIBLE with money that taught me to be stingy. hmmmmm...maybe it's time for a little googling.
Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 19:05:49
In reply to Re: What about us scrooges?, posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 18:34:27
My best friend's husband was like my mother.
I think my father liked to spend money, but had to become careful out of necessity. He resented the financial position my mother put him in until the day he died.
I hope my husband isn't reacting to my behavior.
But... He's not really a scrooge. He's just very organized.
Posted by Phillipa on March 23, 2006, at 19:49:13
In reply to Re: What about us scrooges?, posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 18:34:27
Thurso I never would have guessed that you were a girl!!!! That blew me away. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by thuso on March 23, 2006, at 20:13:30
In reply to Re: What about us scrooges? » thuso, posted by Phillipa on March 23, 2006, at 19:49:13
> Thuso I never would have guessed that you were a girl!!!! That blew me away. Fondly, Phillipa
>hahaha! Why wouldn't you have guessed that? I know I've mentioned it a few times now and each time at least someone is shocked. Do I sound male? haha!
Posted by AuntieMel on March 24, 2006, at 9:21:56
In reply to How many have spending problems?, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
Not me. I have no problem spending money.
<grin>
But - seriously - if you have a hard time with the card, put it in a container of water and stick it in the freezer.
It doesn't cut you off if you need the card, but it *does* force you to think about it.
Posted by Dinah on March 24, 2006, at 9:27:36
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » Dinah, posted by AuntieMel on March 24, 2006, at 9:21:56
That's a great idea! I used to get around that by using the number from a statement and remembering the expiration date. But with people usually asking for the security code now... Hey! I wonder if they realize that that security code might be keeping people from breaking their financial diet? grin.
I'm all finished reducing my cards now, but my husband will probably give me an emergency card in case my car breaks down or something. And since I'm a spendthrift but never a thief, I *know* I wouldn't use that except where specifically authorized.
I'm so lucky to have a husband who's not at all like me...
Posted by AuntieMel on March 24, 2006, at 11:30:23
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » AuntieMel, posted by Dinah on March 24, 2006, at 9:27:36
Isn't that the truth. I have very few money management skills, but I had the good sense to marry someone who does.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 28, 2006, at 8:42:13
In reply to How many have spending problems?, posted by Dinah on March 23, 2006, at 11:14:18
Great thread, Dinah!
I actually avoided joining this thread because I have such a tendency to overspend, especially when I'm feeling better. "Depression Decreases Personal Debt" - can you imagine if that were true?? It is for me.
I try to do comparison shopping as much as possible, and look for free shipping. Somehow, those online retailers also have minimum spending requirements in order to qualify for the free shipping, which only encourages me to buy even more... but I usually can it to within a buck or two of the requirement. So that helps.
And I have never bought anything on eBay. I must be the only north american resident with internet access who is too scared of that place.
I think a mutual support group here would be great. I'm in.
ClearSkies
Posted by verne on March 28, 2006, at 9:05:06
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on March 28, 2006, at 8:42:13
I'm afraid of ebay too. I have two real-life friends (and I don't have many) who've had to close their bank accounts after they were compromised at ebay. One is right back at it and the other is trying to but can't get through the hoops at ebay to reregister. He's in a loop where he never gets past his username and the new password they keep sending him.
I fall for iherb's free shipping for orders over $40.00. I probably average 2 orders a month with them.
I also have a habit of buying 2 or more of something if it's on sale. Now I have duplicate pieces of furniture, I don't have room for, in the garage. I'm hoping to find the lawn mower before haying season.
Sign me up for the support group. I'm like Steve Martin's character in the movie "The Jerk". I always NEED one more thing.
Verne
Posted by Dinah on March 28, 2006, at 9:16:22
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on March 28, 2006, at 8:42:13
I think I tend to spend more when I'm depressed and anxious. I think there's a barely beneath the surface subtext of "Wow, what an awful day. I deserve something nice." On the other hand when I'm happy and in the middle of an enthusiasm, it seems like the object is the most important thing in the world, and I just can't live without it. It obsesses me until I tell myself that I'm costing myself more in time than I would if I just got it.
Which clearly can't be true. :)
Posted by Dinah on March 28, 2006, at 9:23:51
In reply to Re: How many have spending problems? » ClearSkies, posted by verne on March 28, 2006, at 9:05:06
eBay and Amazon are two of my major downfalls. I'm can't resist DVD's of TV shows. And books of course.
eBay has a real problem with spoof emails. Answer one of those, and poof! you're in trouble. I guess it's because there's so much emailing going on directly between buyers and sellers.
I buy duplicates too! Mainly of shoes and purses and basic clothing. I hate buying shoes soooo much that if I find what I like, I buy several years worth.
This is the end of the thread.
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