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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 5 to 29 of 34. Go back in thread:
Posted by Susan47 on April 18, 2005, at 11:37:00
In reply to Re: Susan47, posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 11:32:11
Right now your self-loathing is spilling over onto everybody else. You won't alienate me I don't think, I'm pretty alienating myself at times .. but don't push away the people IRL who could help. Even just by listening. Okay?
Posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 11:58:54
In reply to Susan47, posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 11:05:35
> I wish I had been aborted. If I haven't changed after 37 years, the probabiity that the same cycle will repeat itself over and over is so high as to be cataclismic. I don't want this life. And I keep trying over and over with so much exhausting effort to do therapy, read, practice copinkg skills- and nothing ever changes. I'm tired of trying any more. I give up.
>Sunny - I read this and saw myself in your words. Please don't worry about your capacity to change and adapt - we human beings are pretty amazing at reinventing ourselves, with the right help.
I for one am amazed at your capacity to help and encourage others when you are feeling so badly yourself. And I want to thank you, sincerely, for all the help you are to me.
That's all.
Hang on.
pc
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 18, 2005, at 12:08:53
In reply to Susan47, posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 11:05:35
>If I haven't changed after 37 years, the probabiity that the same cycle will repeat itself over and over is so high as to be cataclismic. I don't want this life. And I keep trying over and over with so much exhausting effort to do therapy, read, practice copinkg skills- and nothing ever changes. I'm tired of trying any more. I give up.
You're tired. You need a hug. Maybe a snuggle. {{{{{{{{Sunny}}}}}}}}
I'm going to give you my objective view of your situation (*as if* I can really be objective)....
Something really crappy, scary, and violent happened in your closest personal relationship. You immediately recognized it for what it was, took steps to isolate yourself from further harm, and you're working diligently at coping with the changes it has made *in your life*.
You are living the Serenity Prayer.
It may have taken you 37 years to obtain that wisdom, but it is there, right now. And, it is your wisdom. You're not reciting advice you've heard from others. You're living in your own wisdom.
You're tired. You're frustrated. Those will pass. But the wisdom will not pass. It will continue to grow. Just like you, it will continue to grow.
Nurture yourself. Get grounded. Get ready. And give 'em sh*t.
Lar
Posted by Susan47 on April 18, 2005, at 12:12:00
In reply to Re: sunny10, posted by Larry Hoover on April 18, 2005, at 12:08:53
And PC, oh, right on.
Posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 12:53:51
In reply to Re: sunny10 » Larry Hoover, posted by Susan47 on April 18, 2005, at 12:12:00
want to just give up... have utilized last of my inner resources.
Tired of trying. Tired, just tired...
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 18, 2005, at 13:24:21
In reply to Re: not feeling very Serene..., posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 12:53:51
> want to just give up... have utilized last of my inner resources.
>
> Tired of trying. Tired, just tired...Then please rest. Please?
Hugs,
Lar
Posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 13:34:22
In reply to Re: not feeling very Serene... » sunny10, posted by Larry Hoover on April 18, 2005, at 13:24:21
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 18, 2005, at 14:58:03
In reply to Re: gotta work- would if I could (nm) » Larry Hoover, posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 13:34:22
Rest is also a state of mind. It is, in part, an attitude. That's why the addict lives for today. All the sorrows over yesterday cannot be undone. All the fear over what tomorrow may bring, do not bear on today. Anybody can manage just one day.....ya know?
I hate to dig into tired old aphorisms, but that's what they're for. When you're too tired to think, they're good guidance.
Take care of you,
Lar
Posted by AuntieMel on April 18, 2005, at 17:40:58
In reply to Susan47, posted by sunny10 on April 18, 2005, at 11:05:35
"Abused (emotionally and physically), and soon to be abandoned again. "
Hold on for a minute, missy. Who took off to the airport? Who called around and found a place to stay? Who is saying clean up or else?
There was *attempted* physical and emotional abuse there, but you refused to accept it as your due.
You deserve a whole bunch of back pats for that.
"If I haven't changed after 37 years, the probabiity that the same cycle will repeat itself over and over is so high as to be cataclismic."
Refer to what I put above. I'm seeing changes and I hardly know you. I know you are tired - and rightly so after this last merry-go-round - but when you get rest enough to look, I hope you can see that:
THIS TIME YOU ARE NOT A DOORMAT.
Posted by sunny10 on April 19, 2005, at 10:01:22
In reply to Re: Sunny?, posted by AuntieMel on April 18, 2005, at 17:40:58
just trying to keep head above water...
Must admit to using humor within other threads here as way to bury head in sand... it's strange to reply "with humor" without actually feeling the "fun" of it...
Am I making any sense at all??????
Posted by alexandra_k on April 20, 2005, at 5:00:07
In reply to Re: I love you, AuntieMel and Lar, posted by sunny10 on April 19, 2005, at 10:01:22
Aw hon, I had no idea.
I didn't know any of this was going on for you.
I just saw this tonight
And read the thread over on psychology
About what your parents were like.
Sunny, you are such a warm and kind and giving and smart and funny person.
((((Sunny))))
What a crap life
crap
crap
crap
It makes me so mad.
I am really glad you are here
Glad and grateful.
You are wonderful Sunny.
If you went anywhere I'd miss you very much.
Quite often I feel like I wish I never existed.
Peoples don't like me saying that...
And when I hear you say you wish you had been aborted I get why.
YOU ARE NOT A DOORMAT ANYMORE
(Very good PC)
YOU ARE WORTH A WHOLE HEAP
YOU DESERVE TO HAVE SOMEONE REALLY SPECIAL WHO TREATS YOU LIKE THE TREASURE THAT YOU ARE
And one day...
One day...
You might.
I might.
Oh God.
Just possibly
Possibly
It might be true.
And things will get better.
They have to.
And we love you.
Don't forget that.
Please.
Posted by Susan47 on April 20, 2005, at 10:09:25
In reply to Re: Sunny, posted by alexandra_k on April 20, 2005, at 5:00:07
Yes, you and Sunny are both treasures. Yes.
Posted by sunny10 on April 20, 2005, at 13:17:13
In reply to Bingo Alexandra, posted by Susan47 on April 20, 2005, at 10:09:25
we are so lucky to have found each other here...
Good thing I've never been one to harbor celebrity crushes or I might fall for Dr. Bob !!!!
My 20 yr old cousin has a thing for Josh Hartnett- could never understand how she can have a crush on someone she never met...
Posted by partlycloudy on April 20, 2005, at 13:33:41
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel, posted by sunny10 on April 20, 2005, at 13:17:13
> we are so lucky to have found each other here...
>
I say that to myself every day :-)> Good thing I've never been one to harbor celebrity crushes or I might fall for Dr. Bob !!!!
>
> My 20 yr old cousin has a thing for Josh Hartnett- could never understand how she can have a crush on someone she never met...
>
Ahem. Admission to having collected Tiger Beat magazines when I was about 11 years old; and having mad crushes on Donny Osmond (head sinking very low) and - wait for it - Michael Jackson when he was still cute. Their posters were plastered over my room. (dreamy sigh...)
Posted by Susan47 on April 20, 2005, at 14:48:49
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » sunny10, posted by partlycloudy on April 20, 2005, at 13:33:41
My walls were empty and bare, I think I might have had one oil painting once. If I'd put anything on my walls I would've regretted it. I wasn't even allowed to read those magazines, when I was old enough I hid them though. And I read them on the sly.
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 20, 2005, at 16:49:42
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel, posted by Susan47 on April 20, 2005, at 14:48:49
> My walls were empty and bare, I think I might have had one oil painting once. If I'd put anything on my walls I would've regretted it. I wasn't even allowed to read those magazines, when I was old enough I hid them though. And I read them on the sly.
A-hah! That explains the late blooming effect. <Spock eyebrow>
Lar
Posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 0:58:07
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » sunny10, posted by partlycloudy on April 20, 2005, at 13:33:41
Uh, PC, what in the heck were you doing in my bedroom all those many years ago?!!
Who let you in?
Or...are you me?
That was unreal - your description. I'm thinking hard to make sure I didn't write that post and then somehow impersonate you on Babble.
Wow. Uncanny.
(I had David Cassidy, too, though. Mmmm...)
Posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 1:03:00
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » Susan47, posted by Larry Hoover on April 20, 2005, at 16:49:42
<Spock eyebrow>
Mmmm, Spock...
(Yes, I know full well Leonard Nimoy's a man past 70 now, and old enough to be my father, but...who cares?!!)
Spock...yummy!
Posted by Gabbi-x-2 on April 21, 2005, at 3:14:13
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » Larry Hoover, posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 1:03:00
> <Spock eyebrow>
>
> Mmmm, Spock...
>
> (Yes, I know full well Leonard Nimoy's a man past 70 now, and old enough to be my father, but...who cares?!!)
>
> Spock...yummy!I think you're the only other woman I know of who thinks Leonard Nemoy is yummy.
mmmm Spock
>
Posted by partlycloudy on April 21, 2005, at 4:45:08
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » partlycloudy, posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 0:58:07
> (I had David Cassidy, too, though. Mmmm...)
Just the Rolling Stone cover! Though I had ALL the Partridge Family LP's.
Posted by partlycloudy on April 21, 2005, at 4:47:32
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » 10derHeart, posted by Gabbi-x-2 on April 21, 2005, at 3:14:13
> I think you're the only other woman I know of who thinks Leonard Nemoy is yummy.
>
> mmmm Spock
> >Oh, yeah? (I once stood in line for 2 hours to see him at a book signing and it was so totally worth it!)
I guess crushes never really stop, do they?
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 21, 2005, at 7:37:46
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » Larry Hoover, posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 1:03:00
> <Spock eyebrow>
>
> Mmmm, Spock...
>
> (Yes, I know full well Leonard Nimoy's a man past 70 now, and old enough to be my father, but...who cares?!!)
>
> Spock...yummy!Well, the fact of the matter is, I *do* the eyebrow thing. It cracks my kids up, and then I have to figure out why they're laughing (when I've just given them something to mentally "chew on"), and it's usually because that eyebrow thing was my closing "remark".
Lar
Posted by sunny10 on April 21, 2005, at 8:32:37
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » 10derHeart, posted by Larry Hoover on April 21, 2005, at 7:37:46
yes, Suze is a late-bloomer!!!
I wasn't allowed to have anything on my walls, either- though I STILL don't read those types of magazines...
I just can't get myself to care which movie star is married to whom or the seven degrees of seperation to Kevin Bacon...
I know these things exist, but can't get myself to give a d*mn....
Posted by Susan47 on April 22, 2005, at 11:25:19
In reply to Re: I do the eyebrow thing, too... » Larry Hoover, posted by sunny10 on April 21, 2005, at 8:32:37
And I can see you doing the eyebrow thing, that fits right in with my impression, you.
Posted by AuntieMel on April 22, 2005, at 12:03:58
In reply to Re: and you, Suze, PC, Lar, and AuntieMel » sunny10, posted by partlycloudy on April 20, 2005, at 13:33:41
Most of them were covered with black light posters. 'The Acid Queen' was my favorite.
One wall was covered in ring tabs {low budget, you know.} I spent hours collecting ring tabs (the things you used to open sodas with - the ones that came all the way off) out of parking lots. Then I made chains out of them. My father told me I couldn't put holes in the walls, so of course I had to. I covered one full wall with ring tab chains. Even he had to admit it looked good.
And I only had plain white sheets, so I tie-dyed them. And the sheets that were too old to use got tie-dyed for curtains.
I still can't believe people actually *buy* tie-dyed shirts.
No movie stars, though.
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