![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
Barely three months after my leave of absence I'm crying at my desk again. I can't put on that brave front for work, can't stop the tears that swell up my eyes and nose. Every appointment I have to leave for, I have to make up the time for. There's no break.
I just can't imagine that it's worth it to push myself to smile and xanaxify (like the new word?) myself through 8 hours a day. I know that there is a sofa with my name on it at home and a cat looking for my lap to curl up in. That's all I want right now.
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on April 18, 2005, at 12:25:33
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
pc,
Do you need the money from this job? Do you feel like you would be happier in ANOTHER job or happier not being in an office environment at all?
Remember how happy and relaxed you had gotten after your last break? Maybe it wasn't long enough. Our bodies are sometimes the first to tell us things that our brain hasn't acknowledged yet. Maybe the need to xanaxify (I'm SURE this has to be a word) just to get thru your work day is a major sign that you need to pay attention to.
What do you think?
Posted by antigua on April 18, 2005, at 12:35:59
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
If you can afford it, maybe it would be a good thing to take the time to pull yourself together. You seemed much less stressed during your leave of absence and you were enjoying new things in your life. Some time off now might save you a lot of trouble later.
Personally, I'm giving myself another six months to pull all of my pieces together (sobriety, coming to terms w/csa, depression, etc. etc.)because I want to move on with my life and I am so sick of dealing w/sh*t that keeps popping up. I am going to either resolve the issues or come to terms w/them and live again. (I'm trying to sound hopeful, here!)
As hard as I try, I can't do it in these bits and pieces. That said, I don't want to be so self-absorbed that I get stuck in the mud.
I haven't been much help, but just wanted to lend some support.
antigua
Posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:36:29
In reply to Re: Is it time to quit my job?, posted by Miss Honeychurch on April 18, 2005, at 12:25:33
Yes, I think you're pointing me in the direction I already know would be the right one. Luckily my sad salary isn't critical to keeping our household running. I feel particularly guilty about being so ill-equipped to hold down even the most menial of jobs.
thanks.
Posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:47:56
In reply to Yes, posted by antigua on April 18, 2005, at 12:35:59
I *do* appreciate your your support and input. It makes too much sense and I'm scared, I guess.
pc
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on April 18, 2005, at 13:24:41
In reply to Re: Yes » antigua, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:47:56
to take care of yourself. No one will do that for you except yourself.
And don't feel crappy about not being able to hold down this job. It is obviously something not well suited to you, your personality, etc. This doesn't make you a loser at all. This is part of life, finding your way around.
Posted by anastasia56 on April 18, 2005, at 14:30:38
In reply to Re: Is it time to quit my job?, posted by Miss Honeychurch on April 18, 2005, at 12:25:33
can't you just feel your entire body relaxing after you give notice at work.
undoubtedly you are working on the depression part of this equation.
ana
Posted by TamaraJ on April 18, 2005, at 15:23:36
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
Partlycloudy,
Well, only you can answer that, really. But, I would say that if your emotional well-being and your quality of life, including your physical health, are suffering by working right now, then maybe it is time to take a break, to cleanse and re-energize not just the body and the mind, but also the soul. It might be in your best interest to leave your current job now, and take some time to think about what would bring you the most fulfillment in terms of career options when you are ready, emotionally and physically, and decide to return to the workforce.
You are a bright, personable and caring individual who could probably do almost anything you put your mind to. Right now, maybe you need to put your mind to taking take of you, and deciding what will be the most rewarding for the next chapter of your life.
Take good care of you (((partlycloudy))). My thoughts are with you.
Tamara
Posted by Damos on April 18, 2005, at 17:12:20
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
Hey PC,
I was really tempted to say "Buck Up", just to hear you tell me to "Buck off".
Seriously though, gotta say I tend to agree with Miss Honeychurch & antigua. You need to look after you first, it's just that simple. There are so many things that make you special PC, way to many to list.
Hope you can find a path to healing soon. I'll be send big waves of love and healing energy your way. Take good care of you okay.
Posted by AuntieMel on April 18, 2005, at 17:15:39
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
It is time to quit when the benefits are outweighed by the costs.
Just don't forget that one of the benefits is just having to get up and out.
I think if I quit mine I'd never see sunshine again. But that's just me.
Anyway - an objective list of the pros and cons should decide it. With mental health being the primary concern.
Posted by Dinah on April 18, 2005, at 17:49:31
In reply to Is it time to quit my job?, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:03:01
If you don't have to to keep your family's life together, I can't see why you'd stay at a job that makes you miserable.
If I could, I'd quit work and go back to school in something that I'd enjoy. I think I will when my son is up and out of the house, if I'm not too old.
Posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
In reply to Re: Is it time to quit my job? » partlycloudy, posted by Dinah on April 18, 2005, at 17:49:31
Since I'm trying to be less impulsive :-)
We are tweaking my meds first so I will give them some time to work. If I'm still weeping into the tannoy by next Monday, then I'll give notice. I would still like a large rock installed beside my desk for hiding behind. (If I close my eyes and clamp my hands over my ears, they won't notice me. If I'm quiet and good and do what I'm told, I'll be OK.)
Posted by Damos on April 18, 2005, at 19:21:29
In reply to I am going to think about it for a week, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
Hey PC, go down to your nearest garden centre, they have these great really realistic looking fibreglass ones that are light enought to carry around with you. And they're hollow to so you can literally "crawl under a rock" any time you feel like it. Please just don't ask how I know these things.
(((((PC)))))
Posted by jay on April 18, 2005, at 20:24:31
In reply to I am going to think about it for a week, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
I don't know if this is of concern or not...but are you on your own...can you afford to quit? Even if married...maybe wait until you get another job??? I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life because of similar circumstances. I'd hate to see anyone else live through them.
Best,
Jay
Posted by fallsfall on April 18, 2005, at 21:22:09
In reply to I am going to think about it for a week, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
Caution: The tone of this post is more about me than it is about you... This is a touchy subject for me....................
One word of caution: For some people, working is strongly tied to their self esteem. There can be a cost to your self image if you stop working.
I'm NOT saying that you shouldn't stop, and I do think you should take care of yourself, and it sounds like it is very difficult for you to work.
I'm just saying that that decision has a cost associated with it. And it is best to take those costs into account when making your decision.
Posted by justyourlaugh on April 18, 2005, at 22:30:20
In reply to I am going to think about it for a week, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
do not think you will not be crying on that couch with your name on it...
whats after the couch?
sleeping all day?
j...
Posted by partlycloudy on April 19, 2005, at 4:54:08
In reply to Re: I am going to think about it for a week » partlycloudy, posted by fallsfall on April 18, 2005, at 21:22:09
Falls - thanks for your advice - I understand the spirit in which it's given! - and actually I feel that my work performance anxiety days are behind me. Work is what gets me out of the house and amongst other people - the work that I do is of no consquence to me. And jyl, I hear you, too. My sick leave was no fun for 6 out of the 8 weeks of its duration. That's why I'm going to wait a bit, let the meds do their thing. I'd hate to have to quit; on the other hand, I hate having to pretend that everything is alright with me when it obviously isn't. Unfortunately the wheels come off before I ever have a chance to collect myself - this falling apart thing happens very quickly and without ANY warning.
I have a splitting headache, so the Cymbalta must be working. Yuck!
Posted by partlycloudy on April 19, 2005, at 7:47:08
In reply to I am going to think about it for a week, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 18:44:50
...who responded with your thoughts. I don't take any of your suggestions lightly, and for me the quality of my life comes before all else. I have to weigh all the aspects - income, purpose, social interaction, and my emotional fragility and how well it's tolerated in the workplace (which is that it's NOT tolerated).
I should have a better and more objective sense of my situation in a week or so.
Posted by Racer on April 19, 2005, at 12:54:54
In reply to Re: Is it time to quit my job? » Miss Honeychurch, posted by partlycloudy on April 18, 2005, at 12:36:29
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.