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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 15:57:06
Saturday today.
Just realised I'm struggling...
Didn't know where to put this so thought I'd just put this here.
I think I may have over committed myself with respect to how much work I am doing this semester. I was absolutely exhausted at the end of the first day. Wanted to just eat and sleep. But I had to prepare for the next days lot. And near the end of the week I felt dead on my feet. Even the students were saying I looked really tired. I know it can be harder at the start with the stress of seeing everyone for the first time. But I know it also gets harder as winter comes along and as everyone gets worn out. And then I am supposed to be compiling an index for a proff and I really don't see when I am going to have the time. And then I am supposed to be working on my thesis. To have a draft of the first half in 4 weeks. And I don't see when I am going to have the time. The time off I have I am sleeping or blobbing. I don't seem to have the energy to do anything. I guess it was hard about my application being turned down. It didn't sink in until today. Today is Saturday and so I don't have anything I absolutely have to do and so I am a right mess. I don't know if I can keep going like this. Preparing for the battle with the service to get a therapist. Maybe I need to take some medication or something. I don't know. I just feel so very tired.
Posted by Toph on March 18, 2005, at 16:12:55
In reply to Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 15:57:06
Is it a race, alex? Can you drop something (other than Bobbling, of course)? If it is a race, can you come in second place?
Posted by Susan47 on March 18, 2005, at 16:17:52
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » alexandra_k, posted by Toph on March 18, 2005, at 16:12:55
Well, to begin with your exhaustion might be physical in origin. Are you taking supplementary iron? Do you eat well enough? Get outside every day?
Posted by zeugma on March 18, 2005, at 16:52:10
In reply to Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 15:57:06
I was amazed at how much energy you have- you post and post and post, on subject after subject, and what you say ALWAYS MAKES SENSE, or is empathetic and kind, as the case may be, and that takes an enormous amount of energy. But the year is just beginning and you just received a major disappointment, which is a terrible drain for anyone. Do you have Seasonal Affective Disorder? That could sap you as well.
I'm sure you will have the energy you need. I'm not a big advocate of medications although I take plenty of them- I wouldn't be posting AT ALL if not for them.
get some sleep and dream of your happiness machine :-)
-z
Posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 16:52:49
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » alexandra_k, posted by Toph on March 18, 2005, at 16:12:55
It isn't really a race so much as meeting deadlines. And having to be in classes. And having to be prepared before that class begins.
Second place... Hmm... I am not sure there is such a thing. I am already just aiming for adequacy over brilliance.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 16:56:07
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling, posted by Susan47 on March 18, 2005, at 16:17:52
I sort of get outside... I walk outside from home to the office. And there is a little bit of outside between classes.
Aside from that it is pretty much sitting in class or on the computer all day.
Even my recreation (babble) is on the computer.
I don't know about the iron. Probably should get a general health check. I think that is one of the tings that is going to be reccomended in the assessment. So I will do that. Maybe that does have something to do with the tiredness.
Thanks for that.
If I am deficient in something or other I might even start taking suppliments :-)
Posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 17:00:12
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » alexandra_k, posted by zeugma on March 18, 2005, at 16:52:10
:-)
Thank you.
I don't think I have SAD. Besides which it is autumn over here and still hot hot hot (I notice between classes).
I think I got loads of sleep last night. From 6pm to 8am so I think I am all slept out. Do feel drained though. Was just going to play comp games or something.Should be doing my thesis.
Should be doing the index.
Should be preparing for next week.But I won't.
Can't face it right now...
I think I may be getting depressed again.
Probably time to start back on the meds.
Yuk.
Yuk.
Yuk.
Posted by Toph on March 18, 2005, at 17:44:44
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » Toph, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 16:52:49
... I am already just aiming for adequacy over brilliance.
>That'll work. Save your brilliance for where it matters most, PB... er, I meant, your post graduate practice.
Posted by anastasia56 on March 18, 2005, at 21:44:02
In reply to Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 15:57:06
i have no idea what it will entail to accomplish the stuff on your list but it sounds intimidating. you are one smart, smart person tho so the brain power required to get it done isn't a problem. motivation is tough to come by when when the 'ebb and flow' is more 'ebb' than 'flow'. maybe meds are in order...it's hard to say...but as my great grandfather william winifred used to say "couldn't hurt".
ana
Posted by minnewa on March 18, 2005, at 23:08:14
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » Susan47, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 16:56:07
Well I wish you the best.. Tahnks for talking to me...
Posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:01:54
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling, posted by minnewa on March 18, 2005, at 23:08:14
Thanks again.
I feel much better after having yesterday off.
So... Back to it today. I think I will have a chat about going back on Effexor with my p-doc on Tuesday. Prevention... Don't know whether they work for prevention or whatever but it is worth a shot. If I am feeling like this already... Well... I know it is only going to get worse.I forget just how much difficulty I do have with functioning sometimes. I don't think I could ever hold down a regular job. Really. Being a student is different for me. You don't actually have that much 'scheduled' time where you have to be somewhere. So I can happily bugger around most of the day and work in the small hours of the morning etc. But I have lots of scheduled time now so it is more like a proper job than I have ever had before. That is probably why I am finding it so hard.
But we shall see.
Thanks so very much for your support.
Good to see that you are still around minnewa :-)
Posted by Damos on March 19, 2005, at 22:33:26
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:01:54
Sorry I'm only seeing this today. You are an amazing individual and if anyone can manage all that you can. But your physical an mental health is more important than anything else so do what you need to do to be confident about those and the rest will be okay.
Lack of sleep, some bad news (School), the general stresses around new living arrangements, of and being screwed over about compo etc will have all worn you down, so shutting down for a day was probably just your bodies way getting what it needed.
You know if there is anything I can do to help, you don't even have to ask, just tell me okay.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 20, 2005, at 0:17:31
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on March 19, 2005, at 22:33:26
> Lack of sleep, some bad news (School), the general stresses around new living arrangements, of and being screwed over about compo etc will have all worn you down, so shutting down for a day was probably just your bodies way getting what it needed.
Yeah. Feeling a bit better today so I guess rest had a lot to do with helping. And I have mondays off so that is nice. I am really appreciating that about now :-)
> You know if there is anything I can do to help, you don't even have to ask, just tell me okay.Yeah. Thanks so very much :-)
I shall have a chat to my p-doc on Tuesday.
Hopefully...
He has yet to confirm...
But hopefully...The assessment should be back too.
Apparantly it was taking so long because she was trying to identify peoples. I hope he found someone. Maybe I can contact them soon?? I dunno...But I am feeling a bit better :-)
Posted by jay on March 20, 2005, at 12:06:16
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:01:54
> Thanks again.
>
> I feel much better after having yesterday off.
> So... Back to it today. I think I will have a chat about going back on Effexor with my p-doc on Tuesday. Prevention... Don't know whether they work for prevention or whatever but it is worth a shot. If I am feeling like this already... Well... I know it is only going to get worse.
>
> I forget just how much difficulty I do have with functioning sometimes. I don't think I could ever hold down a regular job. Really. Being a student is different for me. You don't actually have that much 'scheduled' time where you have to be somewhere. So I can happily bugger around most of the day and work in the small hours of the morning etc. But I have lots of scheduled time now so it is more like a proper job than I have ever had before. That is probably why I am finding it so hard.
>
> But we shall see.
>
> Thanks so very much for your support.
> Good to see that you are still around minnewa :-)
>
>A.K....the world seems to want to put us in these 'conventional' jobs, the 9-5, etc. But like Maslow said, you have to deeply enjoy what you are doing to become a "whole" human being, his "self-actualization" concept. To reach that, that's where the struggle is. Keep that in mind...in fact don't ever forget it..:-)
Best,
Jay
Posted by Susan47 on March 20, 2005, at 12:25:46
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling » alexandra_k, posted by jay on March 20, 2005, at 12:06:16
Hmm, you have to deeply enjoy what you're doing to become a whole human being ... self-actualization, I love that, Maslow was a man to really really love.
And so if somebody is making you feel inadequate, you can't deeply enjoy what you're doing, you don't feel whole; in short, the person who's the thorn in your side is preventing you from your self-actualization, so of course you resent the person ... ah HAH. Makes sense too, in its own crazy way. Don't know what I'm talking about, do you? Does anybody? SUsan's gone off a bit again methinks. Ew, have to post on Books.
Posted by tkmphd on March 21, 2005, at 12:17:38
In reply to Just realised I'm struggling, posted by alexandra_k on March 18, 2005, at 15:57:06
hi,
i am not 100% sure of your situation at the moment, but have gotten bits and pieces from your post.
if it makes you feel any better, i was not accepted the first time i applied for a phd. i applied a year later and got in at different schools. i'm not sure what it was. if you need help w/ the process let me know. what area are you interested in?
Posted by alexandra_k on March 21, 2005, at 14:03:15
In reply to Re: Just realised I'm struggling, posted by tkmphd on March 21, 2005, at 12:17:38
Thanks.
I am into philosophy.
Two US applications in at the moment - one rejection and still waiting on the other.
If they fall through then I will apply to Australia in October (different funding round for the southern hemisphere).
Might apply to a few places in Australia then...
Or not...
Then I'll apply to Canada the following January.
So there is a bit of a way to go yet...
This is the end of the thread.
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