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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by 10derheart on April 21, 2011, at 20:08:21
to be dead to someone when you are still very much alive.
it's cruel.
it's wrong.
how do you sleep at night?
strangers can know you
animals
clients
family
anyone on the street
insects
fish
whatEVER
just not ME
so....
of all living creatures on the entire earth
you choose freely to simulate death ONLY to **me**
well, aren't I just special.
well, i must be really, really important.
yeah. sure. liar.are you sure you were ever trained as a t? all those many years ago? really? did you sleep through it all, 'cause I doubt they trained you to do this at the end of 6 years.
no, *this* is not in any books.
how dare you abuse our mutual trust like this
how could you toss me like garbage, with a side trip to 'under the bus?'
WHO are you, anyway?thanks. thanks for nothing, you idiot, you &^%*^ing *(**&^&^
ihateyou.
Posted by sleepygirl2 on April 21, 2011, at 22:11:27
In reply to it's wrong. you're wrong, posted by 10derheart on April 21, 2011, at 20:08:21
((((10der)))))
Wanna say more?
Posted by Daisym on April 22, 2011, at 0:44:32
In reply to it's wrong. you're wrong, posted by 10derheart on April 21, 2011, at 20:08:21
(((Tender)))
It is so, so painful. I wish I could gently put you to sleep and have you wake up when the pain has passed and the world has righted everything.
Keep letting it out. It really does s*ck.
Posted by Dinah on April 22, 2011, at 6:59:22
In reply to it's wrong. you're wrong, posted by 10derheart on April 21, 2011, at 20:08:21
((( 10der )))
Somehow it's always the client who gets hurt when boundaries are stretched, with whatever good intentions.
I've been meaning to ask you how you're doing, but I can't seem to stay awake lately.
Posted by 10derheart on April 22, 2011, at 12:36:24
In reply to it's wrong. you're wrong, posted by 10derheart on April 21, 2011, at 20:08:21
I guess I was missing the Writing board. I didn't use it often, but I did use it, and I sure do miss it when I *need* it. I'm hoping it's okay to just put that stuff here. I won't always be able to explain all the particulars to everyone. Either I can't or I won't, or I'll forget to....or something. I am afraid that will frustrate and annoy readers. It still helps me to get words out here about the emotions this *man* (if that's what he is....what-ev-er)has triggered in me with his crappy choices and behavior.
I'll be back. I have to take a test and finish a paper today. I hope to post more over this weekend. I really appreciate all responses, especially when some have little idea what the heck I'm talking about. I feel so alone and can't really respond to any of your issues with therapists if you still have them. It just hurts too much to wrap my mind around problems within these close relationships when this person I adore has rejected me so thoroughly. I should be a bigger person, but I'm just not. So I read then try to forget about what I read...sorta. Though I really can't forget any of your stories. Sigh.
I **definitely** could cope with PB and talking about therapy IF he had not thrown me away like garbage and refused to explain why. I had come to be okay with termination. It had to happen in our case and I understood (enough) why. I was adapting and overcoming and I **thought** everything was okay with him, too. But this never, ever, ever included 100% silence with no more contact....ever?? With no warning or explnation.
I am NOT okay with what he did right afterwards and other things I might explain here, if I can figure out how. Not at all okay. He screwed up something that was already horribly difficult, but then - amazingly - we repaired much of that...and then he smashed the repairs we did **together** all to bits.
jerk.
sigh.
I will be back.
Posted by wittgensteinz on April 22, 2011, at 17:45:20
In reply to thanks....., posted by 10derheart on April 22, 2011, at 12:36:24
10derheart,
I'm so sorry. What a burden of pain you are carrying. (((10der)))
There's nothing wrong with being cryptic or just writing down raw feelings, as they are - without filling in the gaps - I'm sure it doesn't/wouldn't frustrate anyone.
The longer I browse these boards - the more I get the image of therapy (long term therapy that is) as a double-act tightrope walk. If one person so much as wobbles, both might lose their balance. It's a precise and tricky path, uncertain and risky.
Sometimes I wonder whether the risks outweigh the benefits. When I read of others experiencing traumatic, unexplained break-ups I wonder "who will be next" and I know it could be any one of us. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
Witti
Posted by TherapyGirl on April 22, 2011, at 20:55:05
In reply to thanks....., posted by 10derheart on April 22, 2011, at 12:36:24
I'm so sorry. You don't deserve this.
((((((((((((10der))))))))))))
This is the end of the thread.
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