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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by lonelygal on October 11, 2004, at 19:52:39
On an earlier thread, I was talking about trying to get a hold of my records. Well, I found out this week that my old t won't let me see them- at least not yet. She says she is concerned that it may be harmful for me to read them- that I will misunderstand them and have "unnecessary feelings of diminished self worth". It makes me want to see them more. And, I don't know what to think about my old t. I miss her, but I am so mad, and I'm not sure I like new t. I was freaking out last night and I left a message for new t. Well, she called me and woke me up this morning & was asking me what was wrong and all i said was nothing and asked what time it was. I think she was ticked - she said something like this doens't sound like an emergency. I feel badly for calling her and like I'm going to be in trouble. But, at night it was an emergency sort-of. I was freaking out. I wasn't about to kill myself, but the pain wouldn't stop... how bad does it have to be for it to be an emergency? I don't get it. I don't get therapy. I'm scared to see her this week. Maybe I should quit- b/c i'm not sure she really cares anyways.
Posted by fallsfall on October 12, 2004, at 6:57:19
In reply to my records, posted by lonelygal on October 11, 2004, at 19:52:39
Please do go to see your therapist and talk about what you should do when you are freaking out. Find out about her phone policy. Each therapist has their own rules, you can't be expected to know your particular therapist's rules if you haven't talked about them. Some therapists get messages at night. Others only check during working hours and want you to call a hotline if you need help after hours. You won't be in trouble with your therapist for not knowing her phone policy. Just ask her what it is.
Given your old therapist's concern about you seeing your records, I would encourage you to talk about this with your current therapist. It is often suggested that patients *ALWAYS* have a therapist present when reading their records. You might want to consider having your new therapist read them and summarize them for you. There have been past threads on reading one's records. Please be cautious about this.
It makes sense that you are scared to see your therapist. These times are what my first therapist called "Therapeutic Opportunities". That always meant that there was going to be a bunch of pain, but that it was going to be OK in the end, and we probably were going to learn something from the experience. It is your therapist's job to help you through things like this.
Good luck!
Posted by ghost on October 12, 2004, at 15:22:06
In reply to Re: my records » lonelygal, posted by fallsfall on October 12, 2004, at 6:57:19
I can see what fallsfall is saying, and it makes perfect sense. But the stubborn "screw you, it's my body/mind/life" attitude says that your medical records are your property and you have a right to see them if you want to. I think I have a real problem trusting everyone though-- I'm paranoid, and always want to know what is being said or written about me at any given time.
I guess I'd think seriously about what I wanted to get out of seeing the records, and have a backup plan in case seeing them raises unexpected emotions or triggers. Viewing the records with your current T is a very good idea.
ghost
Posted by lonelygal on October 12, 2004, at 19:28:13
In reply to Re: my records » lonelygal, posted by fallsfall on October 12, 2004, at 6:57:19
Thanks fallsfall. I haven't canceled yet, so I guess I am going to therapy tomorrow. I did however e-mail my t today. She has told me not to e-mail her anymore, b/c I dont' talk in session and she thinks it's halting therapy. I e-mailed her anyways telling her I was embarassed to go see her & that I feel like a kid & that I didn't want to talk about what happened that night I called her & that I missed my old t. I think she is going to be pissed that I continue to e-mail her when she told me not too. I feel badly that I'm probably ticking her off, but I also feel badly that I feel screwed. that I can't talk to her in session, that i don't know how to trust her & the one way i feel comfortable talking (through e-mail) she won't allow. she said i could bring writing in, but i just dont' want to be there in her presence when she reads anything...
about reading my records... i dont' want her to be in the way when i read them (if i ever get to) if that makes any sense. and why shoudl i have to pay for another therapy session when i can read them perfectly well myself. therapy is expensive. and i just want to be able to read what i want to read and think about it and not be interrupted. i want to be alone. it feels intrusive for her to even be there.
Posted by lonelygal on October 12, 2004, at 19:30:12
In reply to Re: my records, posted by ghost on October 12, 2004, at 15:22:06
i like the screw you mentality. and i don't trust people apparently either.
Posted by Racer on October 12, 2004, at 19:49:36
In reply to my records, posted by lonelygal on October 11, 2004, at 19:52:39
I've seen my records from the agency that was treating me over the past year. I don't recommend it, though. My situation is a bit unusual, since I got the copy of my chart in order to send it on to an attorney. I didn't get it in order to satisfy my own curiousity.
Here are the first questions I'd suggest asking yourself:
1. Why do you want to see your records? Be as honest with yourself as possible, and make sure you're not trying to stay closer to your old T, or satisfying some need to confirm that you're unacceptable. There are some good reasons to see your records -- to check whether there's another actionable in your treatment, to clarify something you've never understood, etc. But there are also some very bad reasons for seeing them, too, and curiousity alone is probably not sufficient, in case the information contained in the record is upsetting.
2. How can my request be satisfied? The law says a few things about mental health records, including that the clinician can opt to release a summary of the record to the patient, rather than the entire record. It also says that another clinician can request the record, on the patient's behalf, even if the patient's direct request was denied -- but the requesting clinician must not allow the patient direct access to the record if it was denied. Would you be satisfied if your new therapist got a copy of the record and read it for you? Would a summary of your record from your old therapist satisfy you?
3. Why is this so important to you? Is it because you're afraid that it must contain something so dreadful about yourself that it would be dangerous for you to know it? Or is it because you distrust your old therapist? Are you beginning to obsess about this?
4. Why are you so uncomfortable discussing this with your new therapist? This is, as fallsfall said, a really good therapeutic opportunity, a place where you can explore a problem together, and see if that helps to build a bond between you. What's more, you might need a little help working out the answers to some of those other questions.
I guess I'm hoping you'll ask those questions, before -- or instead -- of getting worked up over the denial of your request to see your records. There's unlikely to be much in them that would help you, and there's very likely information that would be distinctly UNhelpful. That doesn't mean you're a terrible person, it just means that therapy records aren't intended to make the client feel better -- they're intended for other purposes, like protecting the therapist, documenting progress, etc.
I hope this gives you something to think about. And do take fallsfall's other advice, too, and ask your new therapist about telephone policies. Surely she's aware that sometimes something seems much more problematic at night than it does in the cold light of day.
Posted by lonelygal on October 13, 2004, at 17:49:22
In reply to Re: my records » lonelygal, posted by Racer on October 12, 2004, at 19:49:36
Thanks racer... I've been thinking about your post all day... Not sure i can answer all your questions yet...
Posted by lonelygal on October 13, 2004, at 17:56:48
In reply to Re: my records » lonelygal, posted by Racer on October 12, 2004, at 19:49:36
I met with my new t today and umm, I was surprised but she does not want to receive a copy of my old records. She wants to be left out of it & wants me to deal with them directly. I'm not sure if my saying that I would be mad if she had them and wasn't able to show me had anything to do with it OR if it was the fact taht she would be receiving more info about me indirectly, which she apparently doesn't like- she told me that she wont' respond to my e-mails, voicemails, b/c it doesn't help if i can't talk to her there in person. I dunno if i'm making sense- i'm really tired. i think it's sort of weird.
she doesn't know any of my issues and i dont' feel like explaining all over again and i already feel self conscious that i will be whining, or being a crybaby, that i should just deal with things on my own. it makes me think i shouldn't be in therapy- that maybe i don't need therapy badly enough. that i'm making a big deal out of nothing and should just suck it up.
This is the end of the thread.
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