![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Temmie on July 30, 2003, at 21:37:17
Things have gone through a great turn in the last several days, and I've committed to working on things with Paul. I'm not sure this was the best decision (long-term), but it was too painful, and too difficult for me to focus on my work with the way things were. Mercury, I hope you read my post and know I took no offense at the things you said. I liked your reminder about accessing the inner powers in your referral to doing the "Jedi Knight" thing -- and I'm attempting to do that now. Sources close to Paul think he's using coke. Good Lord. Does the drama never end? I'm ... just writing ... because I need conversation and support right now -- and because I'm attempting to lift up. Paul has made me feel like a precious, priceless, sacred, beloved being .... (And I am. We all are.) I am trying to center myself in that knowing to just steel myself to get through with what's ahead re. the press of academic demands ... and will sort the rest out later.
Can we resume The Conversation? Temmie
Posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 7:02:57
In reply to Mercury, Habby, I miss you, posted by Temmie on July 30, 2003, at 21:37:17
I am trying to lift up here ... but am having great problems focusing. For me, accessing the higher realms has always required a great deal of intention and focused prayer (on the positive end), reflective opening (on the meditative end). I don't seem to be doing either very well.
I have been using sleep medication to help me through these mid-life sleep-challenged years, which compounds the problems of there being no authentic clarity at night. You know ... I'm just knocked out and unconscious .... So last night I went without ... and tossed and turned all night.
Mercury, if you're reading this, you're probably disappointed beyond description that I've "gone back to" this man. Yet someone loves you, dear, and sometimes I wonder if we can't help the ones we love -- when you feel such a deep, spiritual connection.
That said, I also tossed and turned (looking at the clock most of the night) wondering/worrying about the "deep spiritual connection" I have with my child, who needs a move balanced, healthy, wholesome and present mother in this last month of our time together ....
I prayed all night. Prayed without stopping. I just want to see clearly ... say the right things ... do the right things. I want to find my anchor so I don't feel so buffeted this way and that by the winds of change.
I'm reading an interesting book, "The Jesus I Never Knew." When I have time to read that is ... just a few minutes here and there. I'm really going to have to start pulling things together here ....
Whether or not Paul is using coke remains to be seen. That, and infidelity is where I draw the line. I'm going to have to be faith-based strong, which is why I've moved back to this site .... I welcome support and encouragement from all those trying to lift up and live more consciously and more carefully. Peace, Temmie
Posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 8:56:29
In reply to Trying to Lift Up, posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 7:02:57
hi Temmie,
i offer you my support and encouragement ... ... i hope you're doing better and feeling better there ... at least one guy in central texas is pulling for you ... me!
i hope we get to hear from Merc and Habs pretty soon, if just to get you something more than my support here ...
the emotional-romantic-interpersonal-relationship thing can be sooo hard and ... ... potenially destructive ... these things can have so much energy, and if mishandled, can cause soo much damage .... ....
in my own little goof-ball version of religion, i have my 3 commandments:
1) Remain Calm!
2) Do Not Panic!
And
3) Take a big nap!after all, we all do better on lots of rest ...
.... ... .... my point? ... just try to hang in there Sweetie.... ... you know, we have to hope you will look out for Temmie for us ... because we can't be there to look out for you ... so we have to be depending on you to ...
TAKE CARE!!!
~ jim
Posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 12:54:05
In reply to re: Trying to Lift Up, posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 8:56:29
Thank you, Lil Jim .... I sure appreciate your support.
Paul is in court right now (I assume) for A&B charges filed by his ex. Apparently she tried to recant her petition, which is of no use at this point, since the suit is (don't know the correct terminology here) being pursued by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts on her behalf. She is planning on showing up today, I hear, and recommending therapy for his PTSD and rehab for various addictions. I'm sure no news is not so great news at this point ... or I'd have heard from him by now.
I didn't know this man carried such a trail of demons when I fell in love with him ... and didn't learn about the possibility that he was experimenting with coke until last night. (Apparently Jane left a message -- oh, it's too complicated to explain who's leaving messages where and for whom), but apparently the word is out.
I'm pretty sick.
Not as heartsick as I was, but pretty sick.
Oh well. I'm (still!) working to raise my Jedi forces, everyone (!). I chanted the AUM all the way to work, and I am praying without stopping. I feel an aura of light and love ... of peace about me.
I am resigned to doing what I must -- and obviously, Paul is in the process of earning whatever outcomes are related to things that happened in the months before we met.
I am all through with "dating" right now .... That date with Dennis was scary enough to set me back a bit.
I'm hoping ... just to be able to focus enough, to take care of me (thank you, Jim!), to attend to the things I must (like this horrible class), and to see where summer's end brings me.
I'll be okay. And when I'm not, you'll hear about it here.
Thank you thank you thank you for writing. I appreciate your words of kindness and encouagement.
Temmie
Posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 14:48:46
In reply to re: Trying to Lift Up » lil' jimi, posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 12:54:05
hi Temmie,
You have definitely got yourself a very full plate there ... ... i'd call it "too many irons in the fire" -like ... ... and we can all have our reasonable fears about getting burned, you know?
i can be grateful that the falling-in-love thing turned out okay for me ... ... there' so many folks been crashed and burned out by the broken-heart disease that there's that whole genre of music about it ... the Blues ...
... but i do understand how we give up some of our ability to "bail out", when we are in love ...
... so i pray for you my buddhist prayer to Manjushri, which goes:OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
protect temmie from all forces that might shade her light ... support her in her self-preservation ... provide her with your guidance ... relieve her from her suffering ...
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
may all sentient beings be released for pain
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI
OM AH RA PA TSA NA DHI("TSA" is pronounced 'cha')
(... having offered my unconditional support, i should (gently) mention that i would agree with Mercury that your Paul is ... dispenseable? ... ... whereas, you may not be able to act on this now ... ... just keep your eyes on that light at the end of the tunnel and try to watch out, that it could be a freight train barreling down at you! ... when you hear that whistle blow ... JUMP!!)
... please do
TAKE CARE !!
~ jim
Posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 15:19:19
In reply to re: Trying to Lift Up » Temmie, posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 14:48:46
Paul was convicted of ... misdemeanor A&B, I guess. His attorney did nothing. That Jane struck him, bit him, threw him down some stairs, and God knows what else, when he raised his hands attempting to deflect her blows (and who knows, how or in what manner this occurred, I wasn’t there to witness this), the State of Massachusetts stepped in to intervene on the part of the woman, and he was the only one charged.
However, apparently they both have some kind of restraining thing. I can’t remember what it’s called. Suffice it to say -- whatever it is -- it's "against the law," Paul says, for them to come within 50-feet of each other. Or something to that effect. I wonder how long that will last?
Paul says he won't be able to return to his work as a nurse -- ever again -- because of the criminal (misdemeanor?) charges?
He’ll also be on probation for a year – so I guess – I have little to fret about. He’ll be there. I’ll be here. Maybe someone, or something will come along to intervene in the year between now and then – and – I’ll just hope ...
I’m just hoping Paul can pull himself together enough to figure out some new kind of career. He’s a certified t’ai chi instructor. Can one work in any kind of health/wellness fields with a conviction?
I don’t guess he could ever become a teacher ....
I’m also hoping, of course, in that “pulling himself together” note, that he doesn’t fall deeper into the downward spiral I’ve seen unfold around him in the last year ... which apparently now includes coke, crack, or some variation of same.
I guess I need to get to some meetings. I’ve got to keep my own ship afloat, and not invest any more of my precious life’s energy and blood to try and keep his ship sailing, too.
I appreciate your Buddhist prayers, Jimmi. Paul is also a Buddhist. I can’t remember which sect – but he’s taken vows ... somewhere ... and was given the name of Karma Jentsen (sp?)
Maybe you should offer up a few prayers for him, too.
Now? It’s starting to thunder and rain. I think I’ll go for a walk.
Peace, Temmie
Posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 16:14:51
In reply to Is There a Lawyer in the House?, posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 15:19:19
hi Temmie,
rough trip for Paul there, Tem ... ...
... ... Manjushri will have seen Paul when he came to your aid ... as the Bodhisattva of Wisdom and Justice, Manjushri will know what is best ... always does for me ... ...i am grateful you remember to focus your good energies on Temmie for us ... thanks
speaking of spiritual matters, here in the land of pBab Faith, i ask if you can see your aura?
if you can (?)
... can you visualize it rotating with your spine as an axis?
... try rotating it to the right (i.e. clockwise when looked down on from above) slowly ...
... can you feel this making your aura come inward?
or
is it going farther out?... now try to rotate it the other way (counterclockwise) ...
it is going in or going out now?first practice it to determine which way does which: in or out ?
now try to practice rotating your aura, at will, in which ever direction brings it into you ...
... and then rotate it the other direction to bring it out ...... when the opportunity allows (and meds allow you to) do this practice regularly until you can bring you aura into your spine all the way, at will .... and out again ... at your command ...
this is how you open and close your aura ... use this to close it up when you feel dissipated or unsafe or threatened ... this should let you feel more composed ... and open your aura when you need to be more sensitive and more receptive ...
also, your aura should be clear and bright ... if you can see anything in your aura that isn't light (practically anything at all ... there should not be any _things_ in your aura) try to focus your energy on the object(s) to disolve it(them) away ...
these are the means to maintain your aura's health ...
... you probably already know all this , but i thought i should remind you, just in case ...
... please use these techniques to protect yourself ... at all times ... best to close your aura when you sleep at night too ...
and if you notice that things, people don't seem to be making sense ... spin your aura out a little to be more in touch and to relate better ... ... but just a little ...
... mastering aura control may take weeks, months ... ... just increasing control a little will accumulate benefits as your practice enhances this ability.
hope this can help you ...
peace,
~ jim
Posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 17:06:31
In reply to re: Is There a Bodhisattva in the House? » Temmie, posted by lil' jimi on July 31, 2003, at 16:14:51
Dear Jimmi, I do see auras, yes -- sometimes in photographs. Sometimes in the mirror. Sometimes when looking at others. You will be XXX to know Swami Rama invited me to study with him when we meet years ago. I am not immune to the unseen realms, thank God, although I'm a crying mess right now. Paul IS using coke. And I got a letter from his ex today (full of pictures of the two of them) and describing me as a homewrecker, etc. That she's the one he should be with not me. (!) First of all, I didn't even KNOW about Jane. And from what I'd heard, other than convenience -- it was over over over.
Be that as it may, I'm going out for a drive, a good cry, and a meeting with supportive folks whom I hope will help me see straight and get my feet on the right path again. Sad, sad, sad. Sorry to be such a mess. Temmie
P.S. Am printing out your post to read on the way. I haven't gone all the way throgh it yet. Thanks, dear. T.
Posted by Dr. Bob on July 31, 2003, at 19:35:54
In reply to Trying to Lift Up, posted by Temmie on July 31, 2003, at 7:02:57
> I'm reading an interesting book, "The Jesus I Never Knew."
I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon
The first time anyone refers to a book without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html
Thanks!
Bob
Posted by MissouriGal on July 31, 2003, at 21:04:36
In reply to Mercury, Habby, I miss you, posted by Temmie on July 30, 2003, at 21:37:17
Hi Temmie. Hope you don't mind me interjecting here since I'm a newbie, but I just can't help myself.
Chakra balancing as lil' jimi suggested is a wonderful thing to accomplish. Luckily for you, you don't have problems visualizing, and should be able to do it quite readily.
May I make a suggestion? In your local library, there is usually a book called "Hands of Light" by Barbara Brennen. (I believe that's how her last name is spelled. It might be BrennAn instead, but I think it's En) It's a wonderful book that can guide you in many, many ways of "healing". If your local library doesn't have a copy, ask them if they can get it on loan from another one. The book is out of print I believe, but you might be able to find one online if you can't at the library and are interested in doing something along those lines.
I am Wiccan myself (The 100% Neo-Pagan I believe jimi was looking for. :) ) and I also have/do other things. I'm a Level 1 Reiki practitioner, I'm also an empath, and I occassionally do aura interpretations. No, this isn't a pitch of any kind, just trying to give you a little background on me. :) However, I'm not a good "visualizer" like you seem to be. I'm more kinesthetic. I feel and sense, rather than "see", and interpret those sensations into a visual format on my own. You could tell me to close my eyes and picture a red balloon, and even though I of course know what a red balloon looks like, I can't "see" it. I sense it in my crown chakra, and interpret those feelings into a visual.
There is also something else that I don't know if many people have heard of... called MAP. Actually, the technical term is "The Co-Creative White Brotherhood Medical Assistance Program". I use it in combination with Reiki occassionally. Please don't be deceived by the words 'White Brotherhood'. It's no where near what others that use that name imply. It's not a racial slur at all. It has to do with the whiteness of purity, cleansing, protection, etc. I used the double double quotes in hopes that an Amazon search will yield results. I use it on myself as needed.
I don't know if these things are something that you would be interested in, but if so, I'd be more than happy to help you in any way that I can. Yes, even though I don't know you. :)
~Brightest Blessings~
Posted by lil' jimi on August 1, 2003, at 1:15:40
In reply to Re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you » Temmie, posted by MissouriGal on July 31, 2003, at 21:04:36
hi MissouriGal,
... for my part, thank you for your wonderful post! .. .... .. and your kind and generous offers of support and assistance ... ... you've warmed my heart!
... ... your contribution is so valuable and appropriate ... and so applicable ...
... your "interjection" is most welcome!
... i thank you, my new Neo-Pagan friend ...in peace,
~ jim
Posted by Temmie on August 1, 2003, at 6:33:26
In reply to Re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you » Temmie, posted by MissouriGal on July 31, 2003, at 21:04:36
Thank you, Missouri Gal. I actually have a copy of the book you mentioned. :-) There's another good one (hope I'm doing this double quotes thing right), "Awakening the Healing Energy of the Tao." Lastly, I am acquainted with The White Brotherhood -- and all-in-all, I am delighted with your writing. Focusing -- intently -- on Light -- moving Light through my being -- lifting up with earnest, honest intention are all what I need right now. I'm going to go upstairs to my room and do some work! Thank you and bless you for writing. I am most ... humbly ... grateful. Temie
Posted by habbyshabit on August 12, 2003, at 22:34:19
In reply to Mercury, Habby, I miss you, posted by Temmie on July 30, 2003, at 21:37:17
Temmie,
Thank you for your thoughts. It's been a long period of exhaustion and depression that finds me not turning the computer on for a long period of time. I crashed the day after my birthday. I'm still not full of the energy that would lend to long letters and response to what's going on in your world, though I have read most of it recently. I send you love and best wishes for successful navigating of the roiling waters in front of you.
Peace,
habby
Posted by Temmie on August 12, 2003, at 22:50:49
In reply to Re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you, posted by habbyshabit on August 12, 2003, at 22:34:19
Thank you. My. We all have our struggles ... don't we.
Tonight I'm existing 15-minutes at a time. I am cleaning my bedroom, putting things away, and getting ready for a trip up north (to the loons, the falls, the water and the woods). I'll be back Saturday.
I am telling myself -- truly -- my best way of loving Paul ... is to love him and let go. To love his soul, and to pray for his well-being.
And I'm living those 15-minutes at a time, to keep from calling him.
Life is challenging for us all. Best wishes, Love and Light to you, and to all who have followed this sad and sorry thread. Temmie
Posted by lil' jimi on August 12, 2003, at 23:47:02
In reply to Re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you, posted by habbyshabit on August 12, 2003, at 22:34:19
hi Habby
> a long period of exhaustion and depression
take good care of yourself and please rest your soul, sweet spirit!
glad you're hanging in there.love,
~ jim
Posted by lil' jimi on August 13, 2003, at 0:04:40
In reply to Re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you » habbyshabit, posted by Temmie on August 12, 2003, at 22:50:49
hi Temmie,
> Tonight I'm existing 15-minutes at a time. I am cleaning my bedroom, putting things away, and getting ready for a trip up north (to the loons, the falls, the water and the woods). I'll be back Saturday.
>
> I am telling myself -- truly -- my best way of loving Paul ... is to love him and let go. To love his soul, and to pray for his well-being.
>
> And I'm living those 15-minutes at a time, to keep from calling him.
>
> Life is challenging for us all. Best wishes, Love and Light to you, and to all who have followed this sad and sorry thread. Temmiebless you Temmie ... you are seeing the Light ...
... you are doing the best thing ...
... hang in there ...
om ah ra pa cha na dhi,
take care sweet one~ jim
Posted by habbyshabit on August 15, 2003, at 21:23:58
In reply to re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you » habbyshabit, posted by lil' jimi on August 12, 2003, at 23:47:02
Thanks Jim,
I'm trying. 3 weeks seems like forever to feel like this. Trying not to add suffering to suffering with additional negative thoughts. Can't say I've been overly successful. I know this will pass. May it pass sooner then later. I think of those monks who survive years in prison with good attitudes. Were that I had the strength of mind and practice to survive just this wee depression so well.
Habster
Posted by lil' jimi on August 15, 2003, at 23:16:02
In reply to re: Mercury, Habby, I miss you » lil' jimi, posted by habbyshabit on August 15, 2003, at 21:23:58
hi Habster!
> Thanks Jim,
>
> I'm trying. 3 weeks seems like forever to feel like this. Trying not to add suffering to suffering with additional negative thoughts. Can't say I've been overly successful. I know this will pass. May it pass sooner then later. I think of those monks who survive years in prison with good attitudes. Were that I had the strength of mind and practice to survive just this wee depression so well.
>
> Habster... ... you're welcome for what little i've done here ... ...
... ... it is great to hear you ... ... it is encouraging that you've the strength to come and post ... ... i have a vague notion of what your plight must be like ... ... it seems as if the energy flows into you Or it flows out ... and drains your spirit .... .... so save your strength that you may endure until the tide has turned .. .. .. ..
... ... relax ... ... we will be here whenever you need us ...take care sweet soul,
~ jim
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Faith | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.