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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 14 to 38 of 38. Go back in thread:
Posted by alexandra_k on August 10, 2013, at 19:11:49
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by alexandra_k on August 10, 2013, at 19:02:09
e.g., I think Bob feels that he is being restrained in blocking people for only one year (which, while it may be an eon in internet years) is restrained. Compared to the alternative of a life ban.
so... (compared to a life ban) people do have the power to return. to start anew.
but RIGHT F*CK*NG NOW (which is of course all there is) one doesn't have the power to return. because every time one hits 'submit' one gets slapped in the face with a blocked message. so one f*ck*ng does not.
because one is still entangled i suppose. and i suppose that is the point of blocks.
i wonder how many people who got blocked for a year... i wonder how many of them (any of them?) actually kept up reading the boards over that period of time? or whether... gradually... over months (weeks actually wouldn't have been enough) enough time and space (ahahaha) enough distance... so that the memory of whatever entanglement resulted in...
...whatever the f*ck that was...
receeds...
so that one might be in the position to return. to the point of the boards. the support and education thing.
?
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 11, 2013, at 2:06:55
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by Twinleaf on August 10, 2013, at 9:38:30
> As you know, I have never supported year-long blocks, so I can't support Manic's block. I would of course support him in other ways.
I'm not clear in what ways you'd like to support him.
Would you like to support him emotionally? Expressing the desire that I summarily cancel his block could do that.
Would you like to support restoring him to Babble? Helping him let his block expire without posting as someone else could do that.
Or maybe you, or others, have other ideas.
Bob
Posted by Twinleaf on August 11, 2013, at 10:05:38
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 11, 2013, at 2:06:55
As I said, I can't support Manic adhering to a blocking policy which I think is wrongly conceived. I don't expect that you would do things my way, of course, but I have expected that you would acknowledge and respect my point of view. I realize now that I have been completely wrong in having this expectation. There is only one point of view here: yours, and every communication is twisted and altered to support that. I am feeling a lot like Larry Hoover - progressively detached and indifferent - and for exactly the same reasons. And I think you know that I have supported Babble and given it every chance up until now
Posted by Willful on August 11, 2013, at 15:41:06
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Twinleaf on August 11, 2013, at 10:05:38
One thing that's kind of vexing here is that Bob never explained his blocking ideas. At least not while I've been here. I don't understand any more than anyone else why the blocks escalate by doubling each time any offense, no matter how minor, takes place. I don't understand why certain things are blockable offenses, rather than just something one doesn't like, or find unsavory, like using certain words.
I'm left to infer Bob's intentions and theories, but this is always unsatisfactory, especially in the face of blocks that seem very unfair.
And of course there is Bob's insistence on a certain cleverness rather than substantiveness in his answers.
Something that I think must be a question of cultural attitudes or a tin ear for the resonances of language, is that Bob doesn't seem to understand the nails-on-blackboard effect of his little question, "would anyone like to help support X in avoiding a block?"
We all cringe when we hear this, which in this culture is so infantilizing, and sounds like a parody of the 2nd or third grade prattling teacher's question, "are you all being good little girls and boys?" I don't think Bob understands how that question sounds to the ear of those of us who are entirely adapted to the culture of late 20th and early 21st century America- otherwise there is no way that he could keep repeating it--
And then sometimes I begin to wonder if it doesn't represent his attitude toward us, that we are somehow mentally backward, nonpeers, and not to be respected and addressed as such.
Of course none of us is going to volunteer to "help" Manic be a good little boy. And none of us appreciates Bob's attempts to be gnomic, or delphic, or somehow more subtle than we are. We could play wordgames too if we had nothing at stake... if we were the one in control. We could come away from every exchange pleased at our epigrammatic form, and without the sense that the other person is slip-sliding away from every attempt to start a serious and mutually respectful dialogue.
But I imagine Bob doesn't mean any harm by it. And he does care about Babble-- and about us. He simply doesn't see how short shrift he truly gives us, and how palapably he displays this in his posts.
Posted by Phillipa on August 11, 2013, at 20:29:37
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Willful on August 11, 2013, at 15:41:06
Ever wonder why the wording feel but not think is civil. I both feel & think. Do you also? If so why is feel okay and the word think blockable? Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on August 11, 2013, at 22:28:55
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Willful on August 11, 2013, at 15:41:06
> Bob doesn't seem to understand the nails-on-blackboard effect of his little question, "would anyone like to help support X in avoiding a block?"
> We all cringe when we hear this, which in this culture is so infantilizing, and sounds like a parody of the 2nd or third grade prattling teacher's question, "are you all being good little girls and boys?" I don't think Bob understands how that question sounds to the ear of those of us who are entirely adapted to the culture of late 20th and early 21st century America- otherwise there is no way that he could keep repeating it--
> And then sometimes I begin to wonder if it doesn't represent his attitude toward us, that we are somehow mentally backward, nonpeers, and not to be respected and addressed as such.> Of course none of us is going to volunteer to "help" Manic be a good little boy.
Yes. I feel like this in response to some of the things he says on threads about blocked individuals, too.
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 12, 2013, at 2:28:18
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Willful on August 11, 2013, at 15:41:06
> I can't support Manic adhering to a blocking policy which I think is wrongly conceived. I don't expect that you would do things my way, of course, but I have expected that you would acknowledge and respect my point of view. ... There is only one point of view here: yours, and every communication is twisted and altered to support that.
>
> TwinleafI acknowledge and respect your view that my policy is wrong and that it would be unconscionable to support adhering to it.
I'm definitely aware that there's more than just my view. I keep butting my head against others and getting a sore head. :-)
> this ... sounds like a parody of the 2nd or third grade prattling teacher's question
>
> I begin to wonder if it doesn't represent his attitude toward us, that we are somehow mentally backward, nonpeers, and not to be respected and addressed as such.I remind Dinah of a middle school teacher. I guess you see another side of me. :-)
I do believe there's something I could teach, and posters could learn. But I might be wrong. I certainly wish I were a more effective teacher. Let me try again:
> Of course none of us is going to volunteer to "help" Manic be a good little boy.
I think opposition to me, or to blocks, may be getting in the way of support for Manic.
Maybe think of it this way: He's on the other side of a minefield. The mines expire after a year, but he isn't willing or able to wait. He keeps trying to make it back on his own and keeps getting blown up.
> I don't think Bob understands how that question sounds to the ear of those of us who are entirely adapted to the culture of late 20th and early 21st century America
>
> WillfulIn early 21st century America posters might support mandatory sentencing.
In early 21st century America posters might not concern themselves with someone who needs help.
In early 21st century America posters might occupy Babble/protest.
In early 21st century Tibet posters might consider Manic a martyr. Or martyr themselves.
I wonder if in early 21st century Babble any posters might want to help Manic avoid the mines (which isn't inconsistent with opposition/protest). (How to do that is another issue.)
Bob
Posted by Twinleaf on August 12, 2013, at 7:10:28
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 12, 2013, at 2:28:18
Your statement, " I acknowledge and respect your view that my policy is wrong and that it would be unconscionable to support adhering to it," does NOT reflect my views at all. It would be much closer to what I hope for here to say something like, " I acknowledge and respect your views, and recognize that there are legitimate different ways of looking at things." You have assumed a level of judgement and condemnation of your views which I do not have. I don't think anything is unconscionable. There can be mutually respectful disagreement without it becoming a battle. To disagree with you is not at all equivalent to condemning either you or your views.
Posted by SLS on August 12, 2013, at 7:45:29
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by Twinleaf on August 12, 2013, at 7:10:28
> Your statement, " I acknowledge and respect your view that my policy is wrong and that it would be unconscionable to support adhering to it," does NOT reflect my views at all. It would be much closer to what I hope for here to say something like, " I acknowledge and respect your views, and recognize that there are legitimate different ways of looking at things." You have assumed a level of judgement and condemnation of your views which I do not have. I don't think anything is unconscionable. There can be mutually respectful disagreement without it becoming a battle. To disagree with you is not at all equivalent to condemning either you or your views.
Twinleaf, I admire you. Don't ask me why. I don't have the time to create such a long list.
- Scott
Posted by Phillipa on August 12, 2013, at 21:07:33
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Twinleaf, posted by SLS on August 12, 2013, at 7:45:29
I feel it's a challenge to him to get through the walls. Shows how easy it is to post when blocked. Phillipa
Posted by Twinleaf on August 13, 2013, at 7:57:03
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Twinleaf, posted by SLS on August 12, 2013, at 7:45:29
That was lovely of you, Scott. I don't really feel that I deserve it, but the support and understanding, coming from you, means a great deal. The communication gap on administration is beginning to feel too wide, though.
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 13, 2013, at 17:12:54
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by Twinleaf on August 12, 2013, at 7:10:28
> Your statement, " I acknowledge and respect your view that my policy is wrong and that it would be unconscionable to support adhering to it," does NOT reflect my views at all. ... You have assumed a level of judgement and condemnation of your views which I do not have. I don't think anything is unconscionable.
OK, I guess I misunderstood. Maybe that feeling of judgment and condemnation comes from somewhere else. Let me try again:
I acknowledge and respect your view that my policy is wrongly conceived and that you cannot support adhering to it.
How about that?
Bob
Posted by Twinleaf on August 13, 2013, at 18:13:26
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 13, 2013, at 17:12:54
How about eliminating all judgmental words ("wrongly") and just say that you acknowledge and respect that we have differing views?
Posted by 10derheart on August 13, 2013, at 18:18:17
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 8, 2013, at 12:02:53
>>...all he needs to do is let his block expire without trying to get around it by posting as someone else. Does anybody want to support him in doing that? Bob"
As one of your resident (former) lap dogs, I 'm wondering what you think of manic's response today to your ever-so-kind offer to assist him with his...problem?
Posted by Phillipa on August 13, 2013, at 19:04:37
In reply to how do you like his response, Dr. Bob? » Dr. Bob, posted by 10derheart on August 13, 2013, at 18:18:17
It is true also he's written me he no longer wants to return to babble. Phillipa
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 16, 2013, at 2:35:30
In reply to how do you like his response, Dr. Bob? » Dr. Bob, posted by 10derheart on August 13, 2013, at 18:18:17
> How about eliminating all judgmental words ("wrongly") and just say that you acknowledge and respect that we have differing views?
>
> TwinleafI'd prefer that. I respect your views and acknowledge that we have differing ones.
--
> I 'm wondering what you think of manic's response today to your ever-so-kind offer to assist him
>
> 10derheartYou can't expect to be thanked every time you're kind. That's not a reason not to be kind.
Bob
Posted by Phil on August 17, 2013, at 12:36:41
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 16, 2013, at 2:35:30
this has built up over many months without a way to contact him. It's angry but I'm blowing smoke.
my blog was a personal journal. He would use what I said to hurt me. This was down and dirty personal attacks. So...
Just know in advance that if manic posts to me or looks at me wrong, it's his *ss.
I've spent months on my blog getting personal, vile comments from this jerk. These were uncalled for and nasty.
Manic I was an enter key away from coming to find you. I have the connections to find you. I have the time and the cash.
Is this an invitation to fight? I'm 60 and I'm not going to start a boxing career now. Nope, I'd spend that money just to get in your face and say, tell it to my face. Say what you said. Why have you made it your life's goal to chase me around the internet saying things that most people could hardly imagine and I have never done one thing to you.
If you sincerely apologized, I'd be up for coffee if you buy. I don't think you're all bad or good but you have to get rid of an overwhelming desire to make me miserable. You are a grown man, you know better. Act like it, fake it till you make it.
The irony, I think we could be good friends, you have great taste in music. I don't hate you but what you said was not right.Not one word or three days from now that cab in front of you house is carrying one pissed off Texan. That is the last thing you want to see.
Again, fly all that way to talk? Yes, I've done weirder things.Otherwise, happy posting.
Oh, to be honest I screwed up on my favorite forum. I've been there longer than anyone and the peeps are younger. I said something that I have zero recollection to someone in a pm that must have been pretty bad. We make mistakes but we can't become chronic with them. I probably don't have a chance to restore my practically flawless rep there. But posters come and go so....
Posted by 10derheart on August 17, 2013, at 12:49:56
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 16, 2013, at 2:35:30
Doesn't even come close to an answer to my actual question. Why? Don't want to examine your idea of supporting people - who DON'T WANT SUPPORT - in not posting while blocked too closely?
Big surprise there.
News flash - using the 'universal' "you" to tell me or others how "we" ought to view kindness comes across 100% sanctimonious....like your pet likes to write (laughable he knows anything about humility) IMHHHHHHHHHHHO.
Thanks for the education on the basis and use of kindness....when no one asked you.
There. How's that?
Posted by Phillipa on August 17, 2013, at 20:25:47
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Phil on August 17, 2013, at 12:36:41
Phil he writes to me the same way. But he claims to be the most popular on a forum he using. Write if you wish to email. Figure a blocked poster's email could be shared. Phillipa
Posted by Phil on August 18, 2013, at 7:38:51
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Phil, posted by Phillipa on August 17, 2013, at 20:25:47
I think I've said enough here.
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 20, 2013, at 10:32:28
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by 10derheart on August 17, 2013, at 12:49:56
> Doesn't even come close to an answer to my actual question. Why? Don't want to examine your idea of supporting people - who DON'T WANT SUPPORT - in not posting while blocked too closely?
>
> Big surprise there.
>
> News flash - using the 'universal' "you" to tell me or others how "we" ought to view kindness comes across 100% sanctimonious....like your pet likes to write (laughable he knows anything about humility) IMHHHHHHHHHHHO.
>
> Thanks for the education on the basis and use of kindness....when no one asked you.
>
> There. How's that?That's good.
It's possible he doesn't want support. Or he may want it, but make it hard for people to give it to him.
My pet?
I shouldn't have said "you". Sorry about that. An I-statement would've been better. How about: I don't expect to be thanked every time I'm kind. To me, that's not a reason not to be kind.
--
So Manic's on the other side of the minefield and:
1. some posters would like him to be restored, but aren't stepping forward to help him avoid the mines
2. other posters would just as soon he stay there
Maybe he has supporters, but not friends. I guess everyone can't have friends.
Bob
Posted by 10derheart on August 20, 2013, at 12:10:43
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 20, 2013, at 10:32:28
Lou is your "humble" (HHHHHHHHH) pet.
>>but aren't stepping forward to help him avoid the mines
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? How can they force him to not PWB and to be civil when he doesn't want that? Insanity.
Your assertion is utter nonsense.
BTW, the fact you won't block me tells me what I wondered about and wanted to know, so thanks for that. So sad.
Posted by Phillipa on August 20, 2013, at 19:59:23
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble, posted by Dr. Bob on August 20, 2013, at 10:32:28
Manic wrote me he doesn't want to come back. He enjoys "stirring the pot". Phillipa
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 22, 2013, at 1:47:33
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by 10derheart on August 20, 2013, at 12:10:43
> > some posters would like him to be restored, but aren't stepping forward to help him avoid the mines
>
> WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? How can they force him to not PWB and to be civil when he doesn't want that? Insanity.
>
> Your assertion is utter nonsense.One way to rephrase that as an I-statement would be:
> > I don't understand what you're talking about. How can they force him to not PWB and to be civil when he doesn't want that?
I was thinking they could volunteer to be "mandatory civility buddies":
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20051205/msgs/596986.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20051205/msgs/597469.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20070123/msgs/729395.htmlThere isn't an automated a way to do that, but it could be informal. He could email what he wanted to post to a poster who wanted him to be restored, and if they approved, they could post it for him.
Bob
Posted by HomelyCygnet on October 9, 2013, at 9:32:56
In reply to Re: Restoring Manic to Babble » Dr. Bob, posted by 10derheart on August 20, 2013, at 12:10:43
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKMSgZo9c8s
What else have they been hiding from us while we lie on their couches and weep and drink their chemicals??????????????
Are you still emailing **i**i**a about porn you naughty boy you? I hope you are having a good time and feeling well.
This is the end of the thread.
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