Psycho-Babble Administration Thread 296523

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Re: Dr bob is a pedophile

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 8, 2004, at 9:19:16

In reply to Dr bob is a pedophile, posted by stjames on January 7, 2004, at 13:12:36

> Lest see how this works:
>
>
> People have never been under any obligation here to back up what they say. So sometimes they don't. That should be taken into account when deciding what information to trust:
>
this may be a cleaver way to get your point across but I was molested by a pedophile and this is very painful. you seem to have lost any concern for others with this post....it's even hard to post this, I am so uncomfortable...
I hope you can see this.

 

Re: some special training » Dr. Bob

Posted by SLS on January 8, 2004, at 9:44:48

In reply to Re: some special training, posted by Dr. Bob on January 8, 2004, at 3:05:12

> > My concern is that people don't understand the concepts of making things non-accusatory and using I-statements and so forth. It's such a different standard than other boards, and from normal social discourse. I really think it takes some special training to get your rules. Did you ever think of putting together a bunch of examples like this, of blockable offenses, and the acceptable alternatives? Put it into the FAQ somewhere. Otherwise we keep having these cases of valuable, intelligent, well-spoken posters stepping over the lines without realizing it.


> There have always been a couple examples in the FAQ:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
>
> and not too long ago I added a link there to more information on I-statements:
>
> http://www.crnhq.org/windskill4.html


The FAQ serves as a thoughtful guideline for civility, but there is a learning curve involved that includes practice. You are effectively teaching an entire population important skills for improved communication.

It would make for a great study...

:-)

Cool.


- Scott

 

Re: Dr bob is a pedophile » Jai Narayan

Posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 10:26:54

In reply to Re: Dr bob is a pedophile, posted by Jai Narayan on January 8, 2004, at 9:19:16

>I was molested by a pedophile and this is very painful. you seem to have lost any concern for others with this post

Please don't Jump to conclusions about others Jai,
I had the same experience as a child and most emphatically do not agree with your statement about St. James. I think Mair said everything most eloquently in her posts I don't need to repeat anything. There are many ways to hurt people besides the "headline grabbers." Somehow I think you are aware of that.

 

Re: how about this equal enforcement? » zenhussy

Posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 10:41:07

In reply to Re: how about this equal enforcement? » judy1, posted by zenhussy on January 8, 2004, at 8:08:27

you're right of course, a lot of that was unfair. but I guess I look at the hundreds/thousands? of messages posted on the dozen boards at any given time and I stand by my statement "nobody can be right 100% of the time". We get into discussions on PB psych about our therapists messing up sometimes, then we realize they're human and agree that on the whole they're doing a good job. I guess I look at this board the same way. I'm grateful it's here, I've gained a great deal, and sometimes I disagree or am hurt but realize I benefit a great deal more often than not. I truly hope you can feel the same way because I think you're a wonderful asset to the board.
take care, judy

 

I agree with you » Jai Narayan

Posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 10:46:47

In reply to Re: Dr bob is a pedophile, posted by Jai Narayan on January 8, 2004, at 9:19:16

it was hurtful for me also that someone can be so cavalier about a subject that has harmed many of us. it was plain wrong.- judy

 

Re: PBCs » Dinah

Posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 10:59:03

In reply to Re: please be civil » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on January 8, 2004, at 9:14:53

I was surprised he didn't get a block either, especially (as you pointed out), there had been numerous PBCs issued. But a.) you never would have written such a post and b.) that would have been Dr. Bob's response no matter who had posted it, I think he was trying to defuse an angry situation. If the post had been directed towards anyone else, he would have been blocked- judy

 

Re: Dr bob is a pedophile

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 8, 2004, at 11:04:56

In reply to Re: Dr bob is a pedophile » Jai Narayan, posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 10:26:54

> Please don't Jump to conclusions about others Jai,
> I had the same experience as a child and most emphatically do not agree with your statement about St. James.
<I am sorry I have not read all of Mair postings. I will read it when I have time. thanks for the heads up.

 

Re: how about this equal enforcement?

Posted by Karen_kay on January 8, 2004, at 11:08:45

In reply to Re: how about this equal enforcement? » judy1, posted by zenhussy on January 8, 2004, at 8:08:27

> > ...I think on the whole they are enforced equally (meaning the good people who occasionally screw up get hit with blocks along with those who consistently mess up), and more importantly I feel safer now then I did for the period when the board was growing w/o rules in place...
> > take care, judy
>
> Judy1,
>
> What do you think of this kind of selective enforcement with the recent blocks and bans of late?
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20031120/msgs/297991.html
> Re: Before this gets deleted.... » Dr. Bob
> Posted by zenhussy on January 8, 2004, at 7:58:17
>
> In reply to Re: sorry, sometimes things slip through, posted by Dr. Bob on January 8, 2004, at 3:07:35
>
> >>Meaning? You will be dealing with the offensive language from the three posts by the methods you spell out in the FAQ?
>
> >>Or are you saying that if it slips through then 'oh well' and you're going to let it be?
>
> >In cases like this, I think it's usually better overall just to let it be...
> Bob
>
>
> That's the biggest load of bs to ever come out of your mouth Dr. Bob. I cannot believe you enforce your rules so willy nilly.
>
> I think everyone needs to see that you CHOOSE not to enforce the rule where others have been banned for alternate words for DONKEY.
>
> Posters...what do you think of the doctor's enforcement???? Especially those of you dinged for lesser words?
>
> zh
>
> Here's how the doctor treats Zenhussy:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031217/msgs/291964.html
> Re: please be civil » zenhussy
> Posted by Dr. Bob on December 20, 2003, at 16:59:38
>
> In reply to Re: Hold on to these feelings while they pass.... » 8 Miles, posted by zenhussy on December 20, 2003, at 4:41:53
>
> > Who will come take care of everything I've let fall to sh*t because of my depression?
>
> Please don't use language that could offend others, thanks.
>
> Bob
>
>
> Here is how NikkiT2 is treated:
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20031122/msgs/297278.html I'm sorry about all of that shit..
>
> Here is st@cy's special treatment:
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031229/msgs/295751.html and if i ever disagree with what
> you do i can beat the shit out of you and not get into trouble
>
> And fluffy too gets a pass:
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20031231/msgs/296349.html I've been pretty shitty myself. I was laying
> on the couch crying,
>

***Well, I really understand your concern regarding consistency. But, do you feel it is absolutely necessary to point certain posters out who have "gotten away" with things that you haven't? I know that I personally have gotten called out for language and will be watching what I say in the future, but don't you run the risk of making others feel accused by actually pointing out the posters who have slipped through and those who haven't? I too would appreciate consistency, I just feel there would be a better way to prove a point without involving people who may feel accused in some way. It just seems that the point you are making sugggests that Dr. Bob is allowing some posters to have special treatment and warning or blocking others. Is that the point you're trying to make?
I disagree. I just think it happens sometimes that he misses things. That's my honest opinion.

Personally, I was warned for calling my Pdoc a dumba**. I don't mind it a bit. And I do see worse language on here. But, I honestly don't see the point in making a big deal out of it. I have gotten away with worse in the past. I do see a need for consistency. But, I understand that sometimes Dr. Bob misses things. He is human. That happens. Just my personal opinion. Sorry, you asked :) (No hard feelings I hope)

 

Re: Can we please change the subject line? (nm)

Posted by Dinah on January 8, 2004, at 11:12:07

In reply to Re: Dr bob is a pedophile, posted by Jai Narayan on January 8, 2004, at 11:04:56

 

Re: It's just plain wrong » judy1

Posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 11:21:28

In reply to I agree with you » Jai Narayan, posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 10:46:47

I agree that it hurts people when people are cavalier about a subject that has harmed so many,
I just don't believe that a character assessment can be made by it. You said that what St. James did was "Just plain wrong."

I think there is also much potential to hurt when when unfounded statements are made about medications destroying people's brains.
I don't think what Larry said regarding these statements was as strongly worded as
"It's just plain wrong" yet you agree that Larry should be blocked. This seems like a contradiction to me.

 

last post on this thread » gabbix2

Posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 11:40:27

In reply to Re: It's just plain wrong » judy1, posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 11:21:28

gabbi,
hopefully I wasn't misunderstood in my post regarding James, he has been posting here for many years and has been a great help in the past. I regarded his action of his post to Dr.Bob as wrong, and did not address his character.
as far as Larry's block, quite honestly I don't know the circumstances that led to it (since I don't read that board), I was making a general statement regarding posters (that I considered wonderful assets) being blocked in the past and Larry just the latest. I honestly wasn't debating whether he deserved it or not, simply that *in general* I agree with Dr. Bob's blocks and feel they have helped keep the boards under control.
and with that I'm removing myself here, I don't do well with these kind of threads.
take care, judy

 

Re: last post on this thread- me too!

Posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 12:08:03

In reply to last post on this thread » gabbix2, posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 11:40:27

Thanks judy, It was a misunderstanding,
I didn't think you had addressed his character
I was in full agreement with how you worded
what you said "its hurtful when people are so cavalier about a subject that has harmed so many"
And I wanted to make sure you knew that.

I had mistakenly thought you were in agreement
with what I had seen as a character asessment.
Thanks for taking the time to clear that up I appreciate it.

I'm outta here too
take care
G.

 

Amen to all your posts on this thread! » judy1

Posted by jane d on January 8, 2004, at 14:22:11

In reply to last post on this thread » gabbix2, posted by judy1 on January 8, 2004, at 11:40:27

Thank you. It was nice to see the things I wanted to say presented so much more clearly than I could have done.

 

Re: please be civil

Posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:11:04

In reply to Re: please be civil » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on January 8, 2004, at 9:14:53

> Wow, Dr. Bob. If I had a bunch of PBC's on my record, and made that statement, I'd pretty much expect a block. I kind of think I'd get one too....
>

Yep, some of us get "special" treatment.
I feel I have gotten special treatment for some time. So I selected my subject with care, to prove
my point. If you did not like it, why are not you asking why I was not blocked ?

 

Re: please be civil » stjames

Posted by gabbix2 on January 8, 2004, at 23:34:16

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:11:04

I'm speechless..you're the best!

 

Re: please be civil

Posted by SLS on January 8, 2004, at 23:52:37

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:11:04

> I feel I have gotten special treatment for some time. So I selected my subject with care, to prove my point.

That was a hell of a selection.


- Scott

 

Re: please be civil

Posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:58:59

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by SLS on January 8, 2004, at 23:52:37

> > I feel I have gotten special treatment for some time. So I selected my subject with care, to prove my point.
>
> That was a hell of a selection.

Yep, a selection the begs a greater question.

 

Re: please be civil » SLS

Posted by Karen_kay on January 9, 2004, at 0:07:14

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by SLS on January 8, 2004, at 23:52:37

Then again, if Dr. Bob were to block St James for the post, he may have numerous posters accuse him of blocking St James due to the nature of the post. This only leaves the good doctor in the position of defending himself and his actions. It is a no win situation, correct?

 

Re: please be civil

Posted by stjames on January 9, 2004, at 0:16:36

In reply to Re: please be civil » SLS, posted by Karen_kay on January 9, 2004, at 0:07:14

St James for the post, he may have numerous posters accuse him of blocking St James due to the nature of the post

What posters would do that ?

Note to self....go bigger next time

 

Re: please be civil » stjames

Posted by SLS on January 9, 2004, at 0:21:17

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:58:59

> > > I feel I have gotten special treatment for some time. So I selected my subject with care, to prove my point.

> > That was a hell of a selection.

> Yep, a selection the begs a greater question.


Forgive me, but I am still confused. What is this question?

Not trying to be a wise as... Oops. Almost.


- Scott

 

Please Be Civil » stjames

Posted by gabbix2 on January 9, 2004, at 0:25:40

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 9, 2004, at 0:16:36

Yes it would be another scandal everyone would attack Bob because he blocked the person who called him a pedophile. I've seen this type of thing happen before.
Oh god. Its hopeless.
Nevertheless I Thank you ST. James. I've always admired your ability to be concise but that was razor sharp.


 

Re: Please Be Civil

Posted by stjames on January 9, 2004, at 0:33:48

In reply to Please Be Civil » stjames, posted by gabbix2 on January 9, 2004, at 0:25:40

> Yes it would be another scandal everyone would attack Bob because he blocked the person who called him a pedophile.

Huh ?

 

Re: Please Be Civil » stjames

Posted by gabbix2 on January 9, 2004, at 0:43:28

In reply to Re: Please Be Civil, posted by stjames on January 9, 2004, at 0:33:48

> > Yes it would be another scandal everyone would attack Bob because he blocked the person who called him a pedophile.
>
> Huh ?

Oh I was not serious

I was referring to this:
" he may have numerous posters accuse him of blocking St James due to the nature of the post"


 

Re: please be civil

Posted by Dinah on January 9, 2004, at 9:12:01

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 9, 2004, at 0:16:36

>
>
> Note to self....go bigger next time

Please don't. We all have noticed you get preferential treatment from Bob. No need to make it "bigger". I know I feel like a lesser being in Dr. Bob's eyes because of it, and I'm sure everyone else does too. Your point is made.

Congratulations.


 

Re: Above for St. James

Posted by Dinah on January 9, 2004, at 9:19:54

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by stjames on January 8, 2004, at 23:11:04

And to be in context, should have also included this quote:

> Yep, some of us get "special" treatment.
> I feel I have gotten special treatment for some time. So I selected my subject with care, to prove
> my point. If you did not like it, why are not you asking why I was not blocked ?
>


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