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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by sdb on October 11, 2008, at 15:30:53
even if you are at your working place or somewhere else somebody may feel lonely. regardless if there is somebody, probably a family or nobody is waiting for you, there can be the feeling of loneliness. Somebody else experienced this? and how do you think about that?
Posted by Phillipa on October 12, 2008, at 10:57:11
In reply to loneliness, posted by sdb on October 11, 2008, at 15:30:53
sdb I'm always lonely. Used to like me and when I worked wasn't. Now even with someone here it's as if I'm alone and bored. Can't make it go away. So yes experience it also. Love Phillipa
Posted by Sigismund on October 12, 2008, at 16:11:26
In reply to loneliness, posted by sdb on October 11, 2008, at 15:30:53
Lonely in the crowd?
Lonely with a family?
I can do it.We're always dissatisfied, of course.
When people have significant real conversations with each other there is less loneliness.
Posted by WaterSapphire on October 13, 2008, at 6:33:27
In reply to Re: loneliness » sdb, posted by Sigismund on October 12, 2008, at 16:11:26
((((SDB))))
Sigismund got it right on the dot.
I am lonely even with other people around. Sometimes, perhaps it is because we cannot relate, or have no decent communication with the people in the same room. Kinda hard...
Posted by Toph on October 13, 2008, at 9:42:04
In reply to loneliness, posted by sdb on October 11, 2008, at 15:30:53
True loneliness is when your inner self, your purported best friend, doesn't even like you.
Posted by Kath on October 13, 2008, at 20:14:59
In reply to loneliness, posted by sdb on October 11, 2008, at 15:30:53
Yes. I can feel even MORE lonely when among a lot of people. Especially if they know each other & seem happy etc.
I have some good friends & a nice husband & I can sometimes feel really lonely. I'm not lonely if I'm with them, but if I'm by myself sometimes I feel really lonely.
It doesn't feel nice.
((((((((((you))))))))) Kath
Posted by Sigismund on October 13, 2008, at 23:39:41
In reply to Re: loneliness, posted by WaterSapphire on October 13, 2008, at 6:33:27
The trouble with decent communication with me is that unless I'm careful I give people the sh*ts.
Maybe I don't give them the sh*ts; maybe I just need to be loved all the time.
But I don't love them, and they want to be loved too.
If they loved me first I could try to forgive them, if they didn't irritate me too much first.
Get the picture? Is there a diagnosis for this?
Posted by manic666 on October 14, 2008, at 8:03:58
In reply to Re: loneliness and decent communication, posted by Sigismund on October 13, 2008, at 23:39:41
if your depressed you are lonley full stop . you could be at your favorit concert with 20.000 people but still be on your own, the depression monster want,s you all to himself , he only lets you go when he feel,s like it the selfish bast/ard why dont he take a day of an play in the middle of the freeway in rush hour an do us all favour. manic666
Posted by sdb on October 14, 2008, at 11:01:26
In reply to Re: loneliness » sdb, posted by Kath on October 13, 2008, at 20:14:59
the feeling is transient. depending on somebodies daily life, communication can be very formal. that you can feel more lonely in a lot of people is something that I can understand.
Posted by sdb on October 14, 2008, at 12:26:04
In reply to Re: loneliness, posted by sdb on October 14, 2008, at 11:01:26
its' very interesting that for some people loneliness isn't instantly negative. I've hard from people meditating for years in Tibet in a cave. Maybe it is a difference if you feel lonely in western city or in a non typical Tibet mountain region. I asked myself if I could survive such an experiment psychologically...(apart from nutrition problems cetera)
Posted by Sigismund on October 14, 2008, at 18:15:43
In reply to Re: loneliness, posted by sdb on October 14, 2008, at 12:26:04
http://www.hermitary.com/features/images/buddhist/palmo1.jpg
I suppose you would have to get your own food?
Posted by Cal on October 16, 2008, at 11:48:20
In reply to Re: loneliness » sdb, posted by Sigismund on October 14, 2008, at 18:15:43
Yes at times its when you are faced with the reality of other people being around you, that you become more aware of how your feeling inside. Why this is I don't know. Somehow the lonely feeling when I am actually alone feels manageable and actually comforting in some strange way, but put another into the picture along with that feeling then its like suddenly how I'm feeling must be wrong or bad, perhaps its the false masks of others that we experience and hence feels as if its our own loneliness?
Posted by Kath on October 16, 2008, at 13:21:51
In reply to Re: loneliness, posted by Cal on October 16, 2008, at 11:48:20
I'm certainly feeling lonely today. Posted on "Psychology" about it.
Often loneliness hits me in the Fall season. I wonder what that's about.
Kath
Posted by caraher on October 17, 2008, at 3:47:36
In reply to Loneliness, posted by Kath on October 16, 2008, at 13:21:51
> I'm certainly feeling lonely today. Posted on "Psychology" about it.
>
> Often loneliness hits me in the Fall season. I wonder what that's about.
>
> KathSAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder...)?
Just a thought....
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/seasonal-affective-disorder/DS00195
Posted by Kath on October 17, 2008, at 22:19:32
In reply to Re: Loneliness » Kath, posted by caraher on October 17, 2008, at 3:47:36
>
> SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder...)?
>
> Just a thought....
>
> http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/seasonal-affective-disorder/DS00195~ ~ ~ ~ ~ and a good thought too! I do definitely believe I have SAD - I have one of the special (& unfortunately expensive) light lamps. You know, I think it might help me, when I'm feeling that lonely feeling, to say to myself, "Hmmm - I bet this is part of my SAD!"
Thanks!!! hugs, Kath
Posted by sdb on October 18, 2008, at 4:29:25
In reply to Re: loneliness » sdb, posted by Phillipa on October 12, 2008, at 10:57:11
> sdb I'm always lonely. Used to like me and when I worked wasn't. Now even with someone here it's as if I'm alone and bored. Can't make it go away. So yes experience it also. Love Phillipa
Does that mean if you would work again it could diminish the feeling of loneliness?
Is it then possible that work is maybe a help for some people?I imagine that 'to be engaged' in work can give a feeling of being a part in something, being a valuable man in a group of people.
But as stated by people above it seems not to be the ultimative cure against feelings of loneliness.
love
sdb
Posted by caraher on October 18, 2008, at 7:31:54
In reply to Re: Loneliness » caraher, posted by Kath on October 17, 2008, at 22:19:32
I hope you also use the lamp in addition to saying "I bet it's just SAD..." after all, you did shell out the money already!
I hope you feel better soon!
Posted by Phillipa on October 18, 2008, at 18:57:56
In reply to Re: loneliness }} Phillipa, posted by sdb on October 18, 2008, at 4:29:25
sdb for me work was my identity and I loved what I did. So for me wasn't lonely when working. Love Phillipa
Posted by Kath on October 18, 2008, at 20:06:26
In reply to Re: Loneliness » Kath, posted by caraher on October 18, 2008, at 7:31:54
Every morning!!! It has a great feature on it called 'sunrise' where you can set it to go on dimly & then go on stronger after 30 - 90 minutes! I like that I can 'see' it even with my eyes closed - as if it really is the sun coming up.
Thx for your support! What I meant was this - I'm an analytical person. To be able to be feeling lonely & NOT good, & to be able to 'label' it as SAD - which I can & am doing something about - makes it feel less scarey. I guess I feel less out of control.
:-) How are you doing?
Kath
Posted by caraher on October 20, 2008, at 2:23:52
In reply to Oh YES - I use the lamp bigtime » caraher, posted by Kath on October 18, 2008, at 20:06:26
Good. I just wanted to be sure - I know someone who has one and isn't using it, just saying she doesn't care either way so why bother :(
I'm doing OK, though I'm not getting enough sleep and am frustrated with a number of things for legitimate reasons. But it's not depression; it's just sizing up what's going on and being dissatisfied. Funny how that can be a good thing!
Posted by Kath on October 20, 2008, at 11:12:41
In reply to Re: Oh YES - I use the lamp bigtime, posted by caraher on October 20, 2008, at 2:23:52
I thot it was great that you mentioned about me using the lamp. It's not at all out of the realm of possibility that I wouldn't do something that could help me.
I'm glad you're doing OK.
hugs, Kath
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