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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
As I ride down Main Street, I pass in front of what used to be my aunt's house. I spent a lot of time there. My cousin and I would make up dance routines to the Grease Soundtrack. Lots of memories there. Well my aunt is gone, and now it is a candle shop.
There are new businesses popping up everywhere. It makes me sad. I dont like change. It is a weird feeling. I grieve for the past. Relatives who are no longer around, I am a mom and a wife now, no longer a young girl who is carefree.
This world sucks.
Posted by Declan on October 16, 2005, at 19:36:13
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
I hate change too. But at least it's a candle shop and not a 7/11. I live near a town that in 20 years has been completely gutted. I never thought I'd dislike (and fear too) the modern world so much. And you grieve for the past? Strong feelings of nostalgia? (Who would have thought it, back then, that you'd feel this way now?) The main feeling I carry around with me is grief. I'm never sure where it comes from, how justifiable it is, and whether I should take more Parnate.
Declan
Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2005, at 19:43:07
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
I identify, especially with the last part.
Lately, all the people I rely on have either died, or disappeared or are going to disappear, or proved themselves to be less capable than I had hoped. I keep looking around for a grownup to take care of things, and coming to the sad realization that that grownup is me.
My husband quoted Doug (the Nickelodeon cartoon) for me. To paraphrase, "I'd been hoping to meet a wiser, more mature, person to help me with my problems. Then I found out that the wiser, more mature person was me."
I hate that.
Posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 20:09:04
In reply to Re: Do you hate change. » lynn971, posted by Dinah on October 16, 2005, at 19:43:07
When did I become the adult? Another thing. The world used to be exciting, I was like a kid who was trying to figure out a new game. Now that I know how the game works, the excitement is gone. Scared for the future, scared for my kids. I am a christian, so I rely on Jesus, but so much is happening in the world. Good people dying, while sexual predators run ramport. Earthquakes, wars, pestilence (bird flu), tsunami, 911, hurricanes, energy crisis.
I hate my job now.
I have always loved my job until this year. A student cursed out a teacher and absolutely nothing happened to him. Another student stuck children with a needle (used for diabetics) he only got a 3 day suspension. Am I just in a depression?
Posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 20:15:29
In reply to Re: Declan and Dinah, posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 20:09:04
>It all plays a role in why you and me IMO are depressed. This is the real world and it isn't very pretty when you look past the beauty on the outside. I do believe in Heaven so I won't be here or in any similiar when I pass. Just my input.
Posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 20:32:14
In reply to No Lynn » lynn971, posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 20:15:29
Posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 20:33:50
In reply to Re: Hi Wildcard! Missed you (nm), posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 20:32:14
>I will be back soon but I'm here.
Posted by JenStar on October 16, 2005, at 21:10:31
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
hi Lynn,
Sometimes I get sad when i see change, too.When I visit my parents and drive down the street where I used to live, I see that it's getting older. The houses are more dilapidated, the sidewalks are cracking, and there is a LOT more traffic. The old businesses that I "know" have changed. The store I used to spend HOURS in is gone - and car dealerships have sprung up. :(
It makes me feel so ungrounded, so lost, like I'm just floating around without an anchor. I wanted to think of home as a stable base, not just in my memory, but for REAL too. I hate seeing my parents get older and sicker. It's scary.
I also hate being the "adult." It doesn't feel right! OK, I'm older...but not ready to be "the adult" person around! I mean, I DO think I'm smart and thoughtful and insightful and all that, but I didn't want to be THE one, you know?
It's scary. Sometimes I just want to curl up somewhere safe and hide away.
Anyway, sorry for talking about me so much. But I think I get what you're feeling...at least, I think I do. And I know there are people like Dinah who have suffered HUGE, roiling changes. Dinah, you're a priceless gem and a strong woman for being able to deal with all of that. Seriously strong.
take care,
JenStar
Posted by JenStar on October 16, 2005, at 21:12:14
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
Lynn,
I'm sorry your aunt's home is not a home anymore. :( But I'm sure there are good things, too, about change! You have wonderful kids, and you ARE a smart strong adult. I know it's weird to be the adult and to be the caretaker, not the caretaken (if that's a word), but still, there are some beautiful new things about being you in this moment too. :)JenStar
Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2005, at 21:23:34
In reply to Re: Do you hate change. » lynn971, posted by JenStar on October 16, 2005, at 21:10:31
People sometimes ask the secondary benefits to my actions.
There are tons of secondary benefits to not being strong. My husband is now looking a lot to me for decisions, and wanting me to handle things, etc. etc. just because I've proved I can do it better than he can. Sigh. My work is relying on me for things.
Of course that's on 1.5 mg Risperdal which has me gaining weight like crazy so much so that I dream I'm breastfeeding. lol.
Posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 21:31:15
In reply to Re: Do you hate change. » lynn971, posted by JenStar on October 16, 2005, at 21:10:31
You have completely described how I am feeling. Especially the floating around without an anchor. I did not know how to describe it but you did it. Thanks. I also agree that Dinah is a jewel. She is strong.
Posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 21:34:39
In reply to Re: Do you hate change. » lynn971, posted by JenStar on October 16, 2005, at 21:12:14
>I know just what you mean by " I feel like I'm floating around without an anchor"
> "I just want to curl up somewhere safe and hide away".
>I'm older...but not ready to be "the adult" person around.>>>You are definately NOT alone. I will be 28 and have 2 kids and still am not ready to be an adult. I wish I could curl up and hide from so many things but that is not reality. I wonder if we all at some point feel like we are w/o that anchor? I sure do. I agree that Dinah is one of the strongest people that I *don't* really know but she is an inspiration. Why she keeps getting knocked down, I don't understand but she sure as hell keeps getting back up and that takes strength. I admire her ability to keep fighting back. Now I'm rambling...sorry ; )
Posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 21:36:32
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
>Grease was and still is a classic ; ) I am sorry the house is gone but they cannot take the memories!
Posted by wildcard on October 16, 2005, at 21:37:06
In reply to Re: Thanks Jen, posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 21:31:15
Posted by Deneb on November 14, 2005, at 22:07:34
In reply to Do you hate change., posted by lynn971 on October 16, 2005, at 19:27:16
I hate change too...everything always moves so quickly...it's hard to adapt sometimes.
One good thing about change is that change can be for the better. Without change, there wouldn't be anything to really look forward to in life.
I miss those childhood days too.
Deneb
Posted by allisonross on November 15, 2005, at 9:11:32
In reply to Re: Do you hate change. » lynn971, posted by Deneb on November 14, 2005, at 22:07:34
> I hate change too...everything always moves so quickly...it's hard to adapt sometimes.
Are you kidding?! I am the poster-child for hating change, LOL.....I don't even like to change my toothpaste!!!
It is so ironic! My whole life has been about chaos and CHANGE!
The most recent (5 months ago) change being.....coping with divorce after 31 years of abuse; now thatz change, for ya!!
>
> One good thing about change is that change can be for the better.So far, NOT.
Without change, there wouldn't be anything to really look forward to in life.
>
> I miss those childhood days too.Wish I could say that, LOL, LOL
Childhood of abuse, too); I just keep on, keepin' on; oh yes, and then there was the church (spiritual) abuse thing; voted out of membership, because I got a divorce....
Guess i was born standin' up and talkin' back! Good thing, or I would be drooling in a corner, somewhere!
Hugs n Smiles, Ally
>
> Deneb
This is the end of the thread.
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