Psycho-Babble Social Thread 428096

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Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » alesta

Posted by Atticus on December 20, 2004, at 21:37:48

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no..., posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 20:03:49

You should always feel free to be honest, Amy. If that's the way you feel, then that's the way you feel. I don't understand why you feel that way -- it kind of hit me out of left field, given our past interactions -- but as Jai said, it's certainly your right. Thing is, it can't help but affect the way I feel. Please don't feel bad. I just need time to think. Maybe a lot of people on PB feel the same way you do. I don't know. But that thought sure makes me uncomfortable about posting. Guess I should've just stuck to poems. I just wanted more interaction with others; but if I'm coming across as emotionally chilly, then I'm failing to connect anyway. Atticus

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » Atticus

Posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 21:51:03

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » alesta, posted by Atticus on December 20, 2004, at 21:37:48


Atticus,

I'm not sure I'm any good at this, but I'd like to see if I can help at all. (My first instinct was to mind my own business.)

First, I think "chilly" is taking what Amy said too far. She said "distant," right? I think a lot of that could be related to your obvious intelligence and that makes people feel intimidated. For all you know, Amy is just projecting onto you, and it has nothing to do with you. I think she'd be the first one to agree that that's a possibility (correct me if I'm wrong, Amy). You shouldn't assume that you *are* distant, even if she perceives you that way.

But even if there's a grain of truth in what she said, I don't think it means (in the slightest) that you're failing to connect. I'm sure that's wrong in fact. Jai and amy clearly *do* feel connected to you, *I* felt "connected" enough (or intrigued, anyway) to ask you to meet for coffee, and I'm sure there are others (I don't know you that well).

Please don't regret having ventured into Social. You are an enormously valuable addition to it, and I don't think anyone of us wants to lose you.

just my two cents,
crushedout

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus

Posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:23:29

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » alesta, posted by Atticus on December 20, 2004, at 21:37:48

> You should always feel free to be honest, Amy. If that's the way you feel, then that's the way you feel. I don't understand why you feel that way -- it kind of hit me out of left field, given our past interactions -- but as Jai said, it's certainly your right. Thing is, it can't help but affect the way I feel. Please don't feel bad. I just need time to think. Maybe a lot of people on PB feel the same way you do. I don't know. But that thought sure makes me uncomfortable about posting. Guess I should've just stuck to poems. I just wanted more interaction with others; but if I'm coming across as emotionally chilly, then I'm failing to connect anyway. Atticus

thanks for replying..i'm going to be totally honest and let stuff spill out (my style), so i have no idea how this is going to go over..atticus, please don't stop posting here over this. you're going to get a lot of babblers really pissed at me, lol.:) they love you, atty. you're fun and nice and smart. you're perfect for this forum. it's ok if you don't like me too much anymore, although shocking to me. i guess i have to accept that, although of course it makes me a bit sad. i was kind of planning on leaving here anyway. you were actually one of the things that kept me here. although most of my blunders are usually on admin, i can't believe i hurt you. just please don't run..

i don't even know what i should say right now. but i tried my best. i have a hard time being friends with guys anyway, so maybe this will save me some heartache, lol (looking on the bright side:)) i think it'll all be ok. stay here..the crowd loves you!!! :-)

amy:)

 

don't you leave either » alesta

Posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 22:34:02

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:23:29


i barely know you, but i'd miss you. please don't go. you're cool, funny, and smart.

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » crushedout

Posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:37:14

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » Atticus, posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 21:51:03

>
> Atticus,
>
> I'm not sure I'm any good at this, but I'd like to see if I can help at all. (My first instinct was to mind my own business.)
>
> First, I think "chilly" is taking what Amy said too far. She said "distant," right? I think a lot of that could be related to your obvious intelligence and that makes people feel intimidated. For all you know, Amy is just projecting onto you, and it has nothing to do with you. I think she'd be the first one to agree that that's a possibility (correct me if I'm wrong, Amy). You shouldn't assume that you *are* distant, even if she perceives you that way.
>
> But even if there's a grain of truth in what she said, I don't think it means (in the slightest) that you're failing to connect. I'm sure that's wrong in fact. Jai and amy clearly *do* feel connected to you, *I* felt "connected" enough (or intrigued, anyway) to ask you to meet for coffee, and I'm sure there are others (I don't know you that well).
>
> Please don't regret having ventured into Social. You are an enormously valuable addition to it, and I don't think anyone of us wants to lose you.
>
> just my two cents,
> crushedout

hi crushed:),
you said that so amazingly well..all of those are very good points! thank you for illuminating that..and, yes, i do feel connected to atticus. i hope he didn't think that i didn't..

crushed, you are very 'good at this,' lol. feel free to attempt to clear up my misunderstandings anytime.:) it was really kind of you to try and help.

thanks again,:)
amy

 

Re: don't you leave either » crushedout

Posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:46:38

In reply to don't you leave either » alesta, posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 22:34:02

>
oh, thanks! how nice of you to say that.:) i'm really touched. maybe we all just need to sleep on it?...or go get an enema or something.:) i don't know..it'll work out somehow.

take care :-)
amy

 

you're very welcome » alesta

Posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 22:47:10

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » crushedout, posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:37:14


i'm so glad if i was helpful

 

Re: don't you leave either » alesta

Posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 22:48:45

In reply to Re: don't you leave either » crushedout, posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:46:38


yeah, this feels like something that oughta blow over. we'll see

 

Re: don't you leave either » crushedout

Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 20, 2004, at 22:53:00

In reply to Re: don't you leave either » alesta, posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 22:48:45

I think I suggested that up above.


PEACE

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no...

Posted by anastasia56 on December 20, 2004, at 23:53:43

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:23:29

so it's a deal then...amy is a peach we love and adore...atticus is the squirrel that lives in the tree we love...so they both must stay! Anyone who reads the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is worth fighting to keep on board!!!

anastasia

 

today is solstice and full moon's coming

Posted by Jai Narayan on December 21, 2004, at 7:25:12

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no..., posted by anastasia56 on December 20, 2004, at 23:53:43

not to mention the holidays.
so much energy.
I enjoy both Atticus and Amy.
LOVED the little humorous story that was going on another thread...
I would dearly miss delightful creative story making if either one decided to vacate this board.
Ja*

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » crushedout

Posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 10:44:42

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...n » Atticus, posted by crushedout on December 20, 2004, at 21:51:03

Thanks so much, crushed. I'm not entirely sure why the concept of me being emotionally distant was such a potent trigger. This is something to take up with my T at our next session. It just left me feeling very insecure about posting to people who might potentially also harbor the same feelings, and made me feel very isolated on PB (despite my best efforts) as well. It just seems, given my life experience, that some people chose to be alone; however, sometimes being alone seems to choose some people. Hope that last sentence makes sense. Ta. Atti

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » alesta

Posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 10:58:34

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 20, 2004, at 22:23:29

I'd really hate to see you leave, Amy. Somehow, the idea that I was perceived by someone I like as emotionally distant acted as a powerful trigger. I think a sense of unwanted isolation -- and my difficulty in figuring out why it sometimes occurs and what I can do about it -- is something I've probably wrestled with internally for a long time. I'll think about it and just not be able to figure out where I'm going wrong. I hope you'll stick around PB. And let's be clear on one thing: I don't dislike you and I'm not mad at you. It's just that you accidentally detonated something in my head that hurt like hell. I still do like you and I know your intentions weren't malicious in any way. I think you unintentionally pressed a big red button in my brain, and the issues are mine more than yours. Ta, cool mama. Atticus

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » anastasia56

Posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 11:08:38

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no..., posted by anastasia56 on December 20, 2004, at 23:53:43

Thanks, anastasia. You're one frood who really knows where her towel is at! (Intergalactic hitchhiker's slang for "You're very cool and have got it together.") Ta. ;) Atticus, who's hanging out with Ford Prefect right now

 

Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus

Posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 17:20:54

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » alesta, posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 10:58:34

thank you *so much* for your openness, and helping me to understand why you felt that way. i'm so relieved to see that we're still cool.:) i'm glad you know that i would never intentionally hurt you. i hope you know you can trust me. i may get a little wild sometimes, but i also have a very serious, caring, conscientious side. i have a strong sense of loyalty and empathy, and a very strong moral code. i'm glad you're okay, and that we're choosing to work through this.:-)

your friend,:)
amy

 

anastasia, mmmwuh! :-) (nm) » anastasia56

Posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 17:24:32

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no..., posted by anastasia56 on December 20, 2004, at 23:53:43

 

Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » Fallen4MyT

Posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 18:16:26

In reply to Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception?, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 20, 2004, at 21:34:56

hi, fallen,:)

thank you so much, dear, for your helpful suggestion, and i'm really sorry i didn't reply to it amidst the flurry of posts and responding. You are one of the kindest people i know.:-) hope things are okay with you, sweetie.

hugs!:)
amy

 

Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » alesta

Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 21, 2004, at 19:02:07

In reply to Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » Fallen4MyT, posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 18:16:26

Awww thanks Amy I just hate to see you feel like you have to say you're sorry in soooo many colors. :(

\]> hi, fallen,:)
>
> thank you so much, dear, for your helpful suggestion, and i'm really sorry i didn't reply to it amidst the flurry of posts and responding. You are one of the kindest people i know.:-) hope things are okay with you, sweetie.
>
> hugs!:)
> amy

 

Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » Fallen4MyT

Posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 20:35:14

In reply to Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » alesta, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 21, 2004, at 19:02:07

> Awww thanks Amy I just hate to see you feel like you have to say you're sorry in soooo many colors. :(

i know, i have become somewhat of an 'overapologizer' on this site...i kinda make my own self sick sometimes, lol. i guess i've been called 'uncivil' so many times i'm starting to believe it, lol. dr. bob thinks i'm bad and wrong, so heck, it must be true.:) well, i'm flushing that nasty ideal down the toilet. i was nice before i got here and i still am, dam* it!

anyway, you were there for me when no one else was, and i shall never forget it.:)

amy XOXO

 

Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » alesta

Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 21, 2004, at 22:33:20

In reply to Re: Maybe do not dwell on one person's perception? » Fallen4MyT, posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 20:35:14

Awww sweetie nobody thinks you uncivil it is just Dr Bob has rules he goes by he said the same to me WAY BACK but deep down he adores us :)

HUGS

 

No worries » alesta

Posted by Atticus on December 22, 2004, at 12:30:40

In reply to Re: Atticus....distance???no, did I say no yet...no... » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 21, 2004, at 17:20:54

Hi Amy,
Sorry I upset you. It just took me a little time to figure out why I was so upset, to get a handle on what was going on in my noggin. I'm glad you still want to be friends. I put up a new chapter in our story up top. I was in the mood for something a bit film noirish. The ball's back in your court, and the coffeehouse audience is waiting for you to take the stage, cool mama. Ta. ;) Atticus, all in black, wearing shades, and snapping his fingers

 

Re: No worries » Atticus

Posted by alesta on December 22, 2004, at 16:28:15

In reply to No worries » alesta, posted by Atticus on December 22, 2004, at 12:30:40

thanks, dear atticus. :) ah, peace has once again been restored to the kingdom. :) so you're going with something film noirish, aye? nice. i like the sound of that..guess i gotta try and get my a## disciplined enough to sit down and write again..we'll see if i'm successful at doing so..i like reading it more than writing..stay cool, papi!:-)

amy:)

 

Re: No worries » alesta

Posted by Atticus on December 22, 2004, at 18:52:57

In reply to Re: No worries » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 22, 2004, at 16:28:15

Hi Amy,
I think we need to wrap up our story in the next few posts. We're right at the top of this page and standing on the edge of being archived. So go, girl! And stay tres groovy, mama. ;) Ta. Atticus, who's got his mojo back and a new poem on Writing to boot

 

Re: No worries » Atticus

Posted by alesta on December 22, 2004, at 21:34:08

In reply to Re: No worries » alesta, posted by Atticus on December 22, 2004, at 18:52:57

> Hi Amy,
> I think we need to wrap up our story in the next few posts. We're right at the top of this page and standing on the edge of being archived. So go, girl! And stay tres groovy, mama. ;) Ta. Atticus, who's got his mojo back and a new poem on Writing to boot

all right! good idea. you've got me pumped, atti. i'll get right on it, coach. gotta sober up first, and i also want to check out your poem! cool. you know, i never notice when things are about to be archived..good eye, man! :-)

amy XO

 

Re: No worries » alesta

Posted by Atticus on December 22, 2004, at 22:54:34

In reply to Re: No worries » Atticus, posted by alesta on December 22, 2004, at 21:34:08

OK! Let the hot moose love flow! You da woman!
XO back atcha. Atticus, who rather likes the Biggles character, even if he does say so himself


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