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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
Dear Everybody Who's Turned Me Down for a Job,
I'm sure you found a candidate that better fits your needs. Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy that my overall qualifications are excellent, and that you wish me well. Well, well, well.
I am not well. Monday, I dragged myself out of bed at 6 a.m., got to my newly assigned temp job and nobody knew why I was there. Turns out they didn't need me and nobody told the temp agency. Okay, mistakes happen. I'm not a failure, no need to blame myself for this one.
I can just blame myself that I've been begging for a job since May and this was the first one I got. 12 interviews, and one non existant position.
Tuesday. Temp agency felt bad. Bad, bad, bad. They got me an interview that afternoon. I got turned down an hour after I got home. Felt bad, bad, bad. Cried so hard that the message I left on my therapist's voicemail sounded like gibberish. By time she called back had self medicated with wine and probably made less sense. Sympathy for therapist is in order.
Wednesday. I am so unlikeable that nobody even wants me on a temporary basis. Oh, sorry, that's my negative attitude. That's what my husband says keeps me from getting a job. Must be positive. Yes, I'm positive I'm a failure. See, new attitude. Saw pdoc, answer to self esteem is *born with out it.*
Thursday. Saw therapist. Apologized for disturbing her with phone call. Believed her that I need to call her when I'm melting down. Don't believe her that I made sense. Followed by another temp agency! Oh, boy, oh boy, oh boy.
Fifth floor of office building. Seriously wondered if window opened as I answered for the 14th time why I left my last job. Decided to avoid the window and got into car and cried, cried, cried.
Friday. in pajamas at 12:30 p.m. Will get dressed and rake leaves. Sick of the neighbor kids asking for a job raking leaves. Maybe I should go door to door with rake in hand. Give those kids some competition. Pathetic.
Oh, oh, oh. Negative attitude. Husband gets mad and says that's why I don't get jobs. Bad, bad, bad. I am bad.
Clearly this badness comes across to all who speak to me. On paper or cyberspace I must not send out those danger, danger avoid her signals that shoot out in person. The ones that say, she's qualified, but kind of creepy or something, you know what I mean?
Decided in the future to lie, lie, lie about last job. Funding ran out sounds so much better than doctoring up *psycho boss made my life a living hell.* My references don't include my ex boss, might be safe. HR would say I'm eligible for rehire 'cause I gave proper notice. Even though my stuff was packed into a box and I was escorted out the door. I am when hell freezes over eligible to go back there.
Thank you for reading this, assuming anybody did.
Poet
Queen of Employment Losers & Badness & Madness
Posted by justyourlaugh on October 29, 2004, at 13:40:40
In reply to Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
i read all your post poet..
it had a nice flow about it.
i am sorry you feel so rejected and unwanted,
you are good good good...
i was out in the leaves today..
it did help..
it is a new day tomorrow..
yahdah yadah yahdah
peace poet
jyl
Posted by jay on October 29, 2004, at 16:28:52
In reply to Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
Hi....I just wanted to relate my story, as you must know you are not alone. So
*many* of us with mental health issues seem to get the 'bad end' of the deal when it
comes to jobs. So, let me tell you my story.For quite a few years, I worked at minimal paying 'basic' jobs, after I went through a
bad depression. My meds...nothing was working out. I did everything from being a
security guard to an office cleaner. Here I was a guy with a degree in social work
and 10+ years experience in the field. I was making minimum wage, and I was
getting *heat* from everybody...bosses who used me, treated me like crud...I felt as
low as you can go. It's like a self perpetuating machine....the negativity feeds itself.
I did these jobs for almost 7 years.But, one day this past Summer, just by my desire to keep some *hope* alive, I
applied for a job as a therapist who works with developmental handicapped folks. I
prayed...heck begged for a *miracle*. And yes, I was luckily handed the job in July.
Yes, *miracles* still do happen..heh. So, now I am doing professional social work
that is eons beyond what I was doing....and really, it was a matter of chance, luck,
and perseverance. You've gone through all of this sh*t...it can only get better.Yes, I still have many of the same mental health issues I had before the job, but I
now have a bit of a boost of self-esteem and that is what we all deserve! The
experience has also made me a better person I think...much more humbler, thankful,
etc. So, try and detach yourself from your *job*....your are a greater sum more than
the simple, menial little jobs. The economy is bad right now...only way to get ahead
is if you are born into wealth, and there are millions like you and I.Anyhow, I hope you are feeling better...and please don't let all of the negativity
bound you down or reduce your feeling of self worth. You are above and beyond
the jobs you apply for.Best,
Jay
Posted by Poet on October 31, 2004, at 15:18:27
In reply to Re: Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by justyourlaugh on October 29, 2004, at 13:40:40
Posted by Poet on October 31, 2004, at 15:25:10
In reply to Re: Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant » Poet, posted by jay on October 29, 2004, at 16:28:52
Hi Jay,
Thanks so much for the inspiration.
Last April I fell into a major depression, my meds kicked out, we bought a new house, and I quit my job all within two weeks of each other.
New meds have kicked in, but I just can't get a job. I'm going to dumb down my resume and keep at it. Right now, I'll take anything as we need the money, but I deserve a job that uses my writing skills, not just my typing ones. Sigh.
Thanks again. You did it and so can I. I'll keep repeating that like a mantra.
Poet
Posted by JohnDoenut on November 1, 2004, at 18:10:16
In reply to Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
Im trying to find a job and I find that I have to make up little lies like why I left my last job and what Im doing now. I realize in order to get ahead in this world you have to lie to people and tell them what they want to hear without them not finding out you are lying. If you then get hired and can do the job well then who cares because they are happy right?! The world is in a bad place right now and there are a lot of unemployed people or people driving cabs that should be doing something more useful.
Posted by partlycloudy on November 2, 2004, at 5:46:48
In reply to Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
Poet, I agree with the others. It helped me a lot when I decided that I was not going to have what I did for work define who I am. A paycheck is a paycheck, not a validation of my worth, you know? I don't lie on my resumes, but I leave things out. For me it comes down to what kind of rapport I have with the people I might be working for.
Good luck, I know you will come out of this OK.
pc
Posted by Poet on November 2, 2004, at 16:58:26
In reply to Re: Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant, posted by JohnDoenut on November 1, 2004, at 18:10:16
Hi John,
I am lying about why I left my job. I came up with something to cover that I've been looking unsuccessfully since May, too.
Sad that I (we) have to lie to get jobs. But lie I will.
Poet
Posted by Poet on November 2, 2004, at 17:02:19
In reply to Re: Lost temp job meltdown long (much needed) rant » Poet, posted by partlycloudy on November 2, 2004, at 5:46:48
Hi pc,
Somebody out there has to find some qualification I possess to be useful. My problem is that my resume is truthful. I'm dumbing it down so I don't look like the alleged marketing communications professional I once was. Maybe then those places that need temp administrative assistants will hire me.
Poet
This is the end of the thread.
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