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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by pegasus on February 4, 2004, at 14:29:06
OK, I loved the depressionwear thread, and someone mentioned that we need to talk about shoes. So, I'll bite.
I have this pair of tan suede slides that have an extreme heel and leather tooling, and I think they're the best shoes I've ever owned. I'm pretty tall, so usually I won't wear shoes with a big heel, but these just make me feel so . . . beautiful, that I wear them every chance I get. And I've even started enjoying towering over people. It's always a good day if I can manage to wear those shoes. (Or maybe I just don't wear them on bad days . . . hmmm)
-p
Posted by Karen_kay on February 4, 2004, at 14:42:08
In reply to Anti-depression shoes???, posted by pegasus on February 4, 2004, at 14:29:06
Yahoo! Shoes! I am tall and always wear boots with thin heals! I have three pairs of black boots that are my absolute favorites!!! It's a tough decision on which to wear. One pair only has a 1.5 inch heel, the other has a 2 inch heel and my other pair has a (gasp) 3 inch heel! And I don't compromise between being cold and being stylish. I'd rather be stylish and cold than frumpy and warm. You never know where Mr. Kevin Spacey will be!!! Or who you might see out! And I just love towering over men! Just today, I was walking through a hallway and my boots clump when I walk. As I passed by doors, people were looking for the "principal", as I say. I like it! I always smile, I'm not important, but for a second I feel that way. I could be, and the shoes make me feel like I am.....And coats.. Oh, I could talk about that too...
And I didn't even talk about my tan ones...Or my brown ones. Oh, and I have a pair of red ones for when it's raining outside that match my red tailored raincoat. I look so cute. But, that's just my perception! But, I'm entitled to it :)
Posted by Racer on February 4, 2004, at 20:38:15
In reply to Re: Anti-depression shoes???, posted by Karen_kay on February 4, 2004, at 14:42:08
I've got about 60 pairs of anti-depression shoes. Here's the allegedly amusing anecdote:
One of my friends brought her daughter to my place one day, and we were looking at my shoes. (She was 11 inches shorter than I, but we could share shoes. Go figure...) She said something like, "I just don't know why you have so many pairs of black shoes?" Her daughter said:
{get ready for this}
"But Mom, they're all a different shade!"
Shoes are a special thing, aren't they? I wonder if men feel anything like that?
Posted by gardenergirl on February 4, 2004, at 23:24:31
In reply to Warning: anecdote inside, posted by Racer on February 4, 2004, at 20:38:15
Oh, what a smart girl she is!
Posted by Ilene on February 5, 2004, at 18:31:57
In reply to Warning: anecdote inside, posted by Racer on February 4, 2004, at 20:38:15
> Shoes are a special thing, aren't they? I wonder if men feel anything like that?
My husband does. He's got way more shoes than I do. However, I wear size 10 AA (I need a combination last, but no one makes one) and I use orthotics, so my choices are limited.
None of my shoes work as ADs, even the Italian cowboy boots with the cut-out scrollwork over the shiny blue fabric. They aren't very comfy, or I would wear them more often.
I.
Posted by Racer on February 5, 2004, at 19:59:46
In reply to Re: Warning: anecdote inside, posted by Ilene on February 5, 2004, at 18:31:57
Tough size to find. My mother wears a 10 *1/2* AA -- be thankful you don't have to try to find those!
(No, you really don't want to know what size shoe I wear...)
Posted by Medusa on February 7, 2004, at 6:37:21
In reply to Anti-depression shoes???, posted by pegasus on February 4, 2004, at 14:29:06
Mmmm, I skipped this topic the first few times I saw it - I thought it was about orthotics or something. You know those pressure-point-stimulation flip-flops with the gazillions of little rubber prongs?
Anyway, now I'm here ... and maybe ... hoping ... DaisyM will show up soon too.
Now, to the transference issues ... I think I've found a pair of shoes that could love me. And they wouldn't require monogamy. Alas, I won't be buying them (unless they end up on the clearance rack) because they're just too expensive and outfit-specific, and I'm saving shoe money for the elusive pair of perfect black pumps. I found a pair of Stuart Weizmans that are the right shape, but the heel is just too high.
Letting myself wear heels was a huge signpost for me on my exploration of femininity as an integral aspect of my life. An earlier shoe-shaped signpost was wearing fashion boots (vs. construction or hiking or winter or other functional boots). Eventually I'll move on to combine these ...
Colorful shoes have also been a big step. I have a pair of ... oh, dear I should really just get a digital camera and make a site for my shoe-wardrobe, as a reflection of my emotional state.
Shoe care is another aspect of this reflection. My mother said she could always tell when I wasn't doing well as a kid (depressed, though not dx'd, since 6-7) by the state of my shoes. Most of the time I only had one pair, and generally I cleaned and polished them every Sunday. Now I sometimes do a routine clean-care-polish sweep of my footwear, and I try to maintain them - I use wooden shoe-stretchers in all of my boots and in whichever shoes need them, and I buy good sole inserts and change them as necessary. But I'm doing rotty-rotty bum-bum right now, and my workhorse pair of clunky shoes is looking kind of sad, to my critical yet tired eye.
> I have this pair of tan suede slides
so P, these are backless? I have yet to own a pair of backless heels ... I was in love with a pair at an outlet a few years ago, and now of COURSE they would match half of my summer work wardrobe ... which does pose the question of whether I could wear backless heels to work? They'd have been a perfect way to transform a work outfit into a going-out thing, except that I rarely go out, mostly just obligatory stuff!
Oh, another aspect of shoes: trouser length corresponding to heel height.
And one more thought ... references to *sharing* shoes brings out all kinds of OCD impulses I never knew I had. Strikes me as kind of like sharing a toothbrush. (One of my sisters used to say, "I LOVE friends that have the same shoe size as I do!" eeeewwwwwwwwww.) I know there are disinfectant sprays, but at least in my shoes, the leather adjusts to the shape of my foot, and I wouldn't want to share that unless the house was burning down and some guest was barefoot.
Posted by Ilene on February 7, 2004, at 9:52:59
In reply to transference issues with shoes, posted by Medusa on February 7, 2004, at 6:37:21
I am intensely jealous of people with normal feet. I now you can't help being normal, but feet are so wierd that I can't wear slides or heels. Much of the time I wear orthopedic shoes. I wish to burn them, they are so ugly, but my entire body hurts if I wear the wrong shoes. Even with the "right" shoes I can't stay on my feet long enough to do much housework or cook a big dinner. No walkies for me.
Despite this, I buy the occasional pair of fun shoes.
I wonder, if instead of lipo, I can get a foot transplant as my depression cure? Any donors out there?
I.
Posted by gardenergirl on February 7, 2004, at 13:45:19
In reply to transference issues with shoes, posted by Medusa on February 7, 2004, at 6:37:21
> Mmmm, I skipped this topic the first few times I saw it - I thought it was about orthotics or something. You know those pressure-point-stimulation flip-flops with the gazillions of little rubber prongs?
>
> Anyway, now I'm here ... and maybe ... hoping ... DaisyM will show up soon too.
>
> Now, to the transference issues ... I think I've found a pair of shoes that could love me. And they wouldn't require monogamy.LOL! (oops, hope this isn't insensitive, but your post gave me quite a chuckle.)
Thanks,
gg
Posted by gardenergirl on February 7, 2004, at 13:47:01
In reply to Re: transference issues with shoes, posted by Ilene on February 7, 2004, at 9:52:59
Posted by Ilene on February 7, 2004, at 14:06:17
In reply to Ilene, lots of hobbit feet available now ;) (nm), posted by gardenergirl on February 7, 2004, at 13:47:01
Posted by pegasus on February 7, 2004, at 14:50:53
In reply to transference issues with shoes, posted by Medusa on February 7, 2004, at 6:37:21
> Mmmm, I skipped this topic the first few times I saw it - I thought it was about orthotics or something.
Sorry, I'll be clear we're talking about shoes we like next time!
> > I have this pair of tan suede slides
>
> so P, these are backless?Oh yes they are. :) And I wear them to work, too. Although my workplace is pretty casual, especially in the summer.
Your comments about shoe transference were great! It reminded me of the first pair of really expensive shoes that I bought, with a big heel (2" - huge for me at the time). I have always been self conscious about being tall, so I never wore heels. And I was a grad student, so poor. Then one day I was at Nordstroms, and the guy brought out these awesome shoes, and I tried them on . . . and suddenly I didn't give a s*** whether I was taller than everyone. I just loved those shoes so much. It was a real milestone for me in my self acceptance. I remember telling myself that plenty of people would love to be as tall as me. And everytime I wore those shoes, I just felt so stylish and sexy. Never too tall. Makes me smile remembering it. I still have them, but they're kind of falling apart now. I still wear them when I need a little "boost" so to speak.
-p
Posted by Racer on February 7, 2004, at 18:08:58
In reply to transference issues with shoes, posted by Medusa on February 7, 2004, at 6:37:21
Ohmygosh! You don't know how much that resonates! My shoes, back when I wore something other than athletic shoes, were always carefully selected to proclaim that, while I might be wearing a fashionable yet elegant business suit and working in a very conservative job, I was still cutting edge.
My favorites, by the way, for comfort and glamor, are a pair of Capezio T-strap tap shoes. Very classic, but very edgy. AND, since they're made for professional tap dancers, very well engineered. (Special order pro models, not the sitting there on the shelf at the dance store kind.)
Man, I love my shoes.
Posted by Pfinstegg on February 8, 2004, at 14:36:53
In reply to Re: transference issues with shoes » Medusa, posted by Racer on February 7, 2004, at 18:08:58
Has anyone shopped for new, or slightly used Ferragamo shoes on e-bay? I have gotten the BEST shoes there-$300 shoes for $15- three pairs in the last six months as a pick-me-up for very low times. I adore them!
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