Psycho-Babble Relationships Thread 576528

Shown: posts 1 to 23 of 23. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

some girls I hate....advice???

Posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 20:08:15

hi everybody,
I'm hoping for some advice! :)

My husband and I are friends with a guy I'll call "John" (**names may have been changed, etc,etc.)

There are 2 important things about John: 1) In general, he has some things in common with us which makes hanging out with him fun.

2)Since he is newly single, John has invited some new girls to join our "group" of friends that usually hang out, go to dinner together, and have casual parties -- and I HATE, HATE, HATE THESE GIRLS!!!

Most of us are in our 30's and 40's, and we're a casual, laid-back bunch of friends. These "girls" are in their 20's and they're giggly and screechy and like to drink a lot, and talk about who got drunk last week, and who hooked up last week, and things of that nature. They do NOT like to have discussions about anything else.

They ignore me and the other "regular" women in the group, although they flirt with our husbands & BF's. I have tried to talk to them, I've tried to get along, and I feel we have nothing in common. Trying to talk is like pulling nails. One of them made fun of me behind my back even -- made fun of my job, which she thought was dumb, apparently. This enraged me, but I let it go b/c she was completely drunk and I didn't want to make a scene. But I'm a highly educated person with an advanced degree, I've accomplished a lot in my life, and I'll be d**ned if I'm going to hang around with people who are not up to my standards of civility and regular conversation!

Lately, every time a group of us get together to do anything, John automatically invites this gaggle of brats to join us. And I am sick of it! I can't stand them, their facile idiotic conversations, their stupid flirty mannerisms, their drunken eye-rolls, and their childishness. Because of them, I've started avoiding the "gang" activities. My husband talks to John often, and reported that John is trying to figure out which of the girls he's going to sleep with. (They're all interested in John, apparently.)

But my husband, although he agrees they're annoying, still wants to go out with John & the crew. The other nite, he went out w/out me. I told him I couldn't stand seeing those girls again, and told him HE could go out with John and the rest. And he did, leaving me home alone! Which was OK, b/c I had stuff to do....but STILL.

I hate the girls. I hate the fact that John has invited them into my/our little world of friends. And I hate the fact that my husband does not seem to be as hateful of them as I am.

advice, anyone????

JenStar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star

Posted by sleepygirl on November 7, 2005, at 22:57:22

In reply to some girls I hate....advice???, posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 20:08:15

you and the ladies may want to boycott all occasions where these girls may be present (it sounds ABSOLUTELY dreadful). Or perhaps if they show up the group should split up - take the ladies and move over to another table or another part of the room.
If John just wants to get laid can't he do that without torturing everyone else? ......hhmmm, but I see your problem truly, how does one communicate to John that the drunken hags must stay away?

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » sleepygirl

Posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 23:40:16

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star, posted by sleepygirl on November 7, 2005, at 22:57:22

hahaha, thanks for being supportive! I know I probably sound petty. The girls themselves probably think that I and the other "older women" (ha!) are jealous of their youthful good looks and generic sluttiness.

On some level, I probably AM jealous that some of these brats have tanned bellies with silver rings, and are thin enough to show off said bellies and rings.

But truly, that's not the reason I can't stand them. I have plenty of thin, attractive friends -- I can handle having non-ogre-like friends. What I can't stand is their lack of social graces, their lack of kindness, their total inability to talk to anyone beyond their little clique, their inability to do anything other than drink and squeal and gossip. I feel like it's high school all over again - the bad parts! I want to have "real" conversations! Bleech.

Anyway, thanks for letting me rant. I hope John lays ALL of them, because maybe that will make them go away...and that he's careful about any diseases. Some of those girls, I can be pretty sure, get around, if you know what I mean!

Still hating them...
JenStar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star

Posted by gardenergirl on November 8, 2005, at 7:11:34

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » sleepygirl, posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 23:40:16

Oh my, that sounds just horrible. I'm so sorry you've been put in that position. You know, when I was in my 20's, I couldn't imagine that 30's and (eek!) approaching 40's could be better. But it is. You know so much more. You are able to reflect on a much deeper level. You've got priorities that are better in line with life (imo). They don't know that yet.

I don't think I would want to go back to my early 20's. Maybe going back knowing what I know now? I don't know. Seems like it's just a part of development...not that we all acted that way, but still. Priorities are different. Getting drunk, hooking up, gossiping, feeling superior...some girls value that. Ick.

I think the separating when the gang goes out is a good idea. Maybe saying something to John about how you feel? Something like, "We like You, John, and we want to be able to spend time with you, without this distraction"? "Pick one and invite her." I don't know.

I feel for you.

gg

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » gardenergirl

Posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 10:27:32

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star, posted by gardenergirl on November 8, 2005, at 7:11:34

hi gg, thanks for the advice! I don't mean to pick on them JUST b/c they're in their 20's. I'm sure that if I looked back on myself in my teens & 20's, I'd see lots of stuff that wouldn't "fit" anymore!

I know that when I was single and younger, I did a lot more wild and crazy things, more drinking, etc. And it was all fun, too! :) But somehow I remember being friendly, too, and open to people, and hanging out with friends who were open to more friends.

Or maybe I didn't...I don't know! But the thing is, I was a hugely different person back in my 20's in some respects. And young single people have different fun priorities than married older people. And depending on the nature of each person, sometimes the two just don't mix well, I guess. (Although: I have friend who are much older than I am, and some younger, and it works out just fine!)

The problem with the girls is they are a "three pack" -- all best friends, roommates, etc. The go EVERYWHERE together. If one goes, they ALL go. And I think John probably wouldn't care that they bother me and others...he's interested in hooking up. And I hate to spoil HIS fun, since he seems to be having fun with them. But *I* don't have fun with them. And I wish my hubby would stay away. I guess that's the part that really bothers me. I'd be OK NOT hanging out with the group, but my hubby still wants to, even knowing how much the girls are awful, and even knowing that one of them dissed me behind my back while he was listening. :(

JS

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » Jen Star

Posted by allisonross on November 8, 2005, at 13:27:34

In reply to some girls I hate....advice???, posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 20:08:15

> hi everybody,
> I'm hoping for some advice! :)
>
> My husband and I are friends with a guy I'll call "John" (**names may have been changed, etc,etc.)
>
> There are 2 important things about John: 1) In general, he has some things in common with us which makes hanging out with him fun.
>
> 2)Since he is newly single, John has invited some new girls to join our "group" of friends that usually hang out, go to dinner together, and have casual parties -- and I HATE, HATE, HATE THESE GIRLS!!!

Doncha just HATE HATE stooopid gurls? I work at a University, and am constantly amazed at their conversations (lack of), and every word is "like" or the ever present f --word. Intelligence of a gnat.

>
> Most of us are in our 30's and 40's, and we're a casual, laid-back bunch of friends. These "girls" are in their 20's and they're giggly and screechy and like to drink a lot, and talk about who got drunk last week, and who hooked up last week, and things of that nature. They do NOT like to have discussions about anything else.

Brain-damage. i think saying the "like" and f*** word does that.

>
> They ignore me and the other "regular" women in the group, although they flirt with our husbands & BF's.

Disrespect! Disrespect!

I have tried to talk to them, I've tried to get along, and I feel we have nothing in common.

You don't. You are intelligent. They aren't.

Trying to talk is like pulling nails. One of them made fun of me behind my back even -- made fun of my job, which she thought was dumb, apparently. This enraged me, but I let it go b/c she was completely drunk and I didn't want to make a scene.

I would have (not made a scene), but I WOULD HAVE IN A CLASSY way (a way they wouldn't "get") explain the "facts of life" to her. How dare she/they insult yo!

ut I'm a highly educated person with an advanced degree, I've accomplished a lot in my life, and I'll be d**ned if I'm going to hang around with people who are not up to my standards of civility and regular conversation!

I hear you. i feel the same way.
>
> Lately, every time a group of us get together to do anything, John automatically invites this gaggle of brats to join us.

How close are you to John, etc,? How about just being authentic and telling him just what you just told us?

And I am sick of it! I can't stand them, their facile idiotic conversations, their stupid flirty mannerisms, their drunken eye-rolls, and their childishness. Because of them, I've started avoiding the "gang" activities. My husband talks to John often, and reported that John is trying to figure out which of the girls he's going to sleep with. (They're all interested in John, apparently.)
>
> But my husband, although he agrees they're annoying, still wants to go out with John & the crew.

Let him. you and the intelligent women, go out by yourselves.

The other nite, he went out w/out me. I told him I couldn't stand seeing those girls again, and told him HE could go out with John and the rest. And he did, leaving me home alone! Which was OK, b/c I had stuff to do....but STILL.
>
> I hate the girls. I hate the fact that John has invited them into my/our little world of friends. And I hate the fact that my husband does not seem to be as hateful of them as I am.
>
> advice, anyone????

i don't know how good this is, this is what I would do (what I said previously).

The real problem?

(LOL)

Your husband and those other men?

They are men. They don't get it.

They probably think those, ahhhhh, girls are harmless and fun, etc.....

They probably even maybe LOVE to be around those vapid, moronic, soporific, girls.

No reason YOU should have to feel aggravated and ucky. you and your girlfriends should just boycott the whole business (sounds radical), but you can talk about it with the other women; come up with a plan.

Simple. life is too short to be aggravated on purpose!!

i try

(I am 59--feel 18, people guess my age at 39-40 / this is my own little plug, here, LOL)

to Never to do anything I don't want to. I LOVE saying
no

In a polite, respectful, but firm way!!

Guess I rambled. Does this help? invite me over, I know just what to say to them; if you are ever in their company again. LOL, LOL (My nickname isn't Sassy---for nothing!)

hugs, Ally
>
> JenStar
>

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet!

Posted by rainbowbrite on November 8, 2005, at 16:35:15

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » Jen Star, posted by allisonross on November 8, 2005, at 13:27:34

>
> Doncha just HATE HATE stooopid gurls? I work at a University, and am constantly amazed at their conversations (lack of), and every word is "like" or the ever present f --word. Intelligence of a gnat.


Just to clear up any misunderstandings...I overuse 'like' but I really dont believe that makes me stoopid? And when I converse with my friends at school it can often sound very superfictial or lacking 'substance', but we are not stupid. Maybe it is just a release from all our hard work spent studying.


> Brain-damage. i think saying the "like" and f*** word does that.

hmm

>
> I have tried to talk to them, I've tried to get along, and I feel we have nothing in common.
>
> You don't. You are intelligent. They aren't.
>


I dont think its about intelligence but rather what Jenstar said about having nothing in common. Most likely, thats the reason.

Sorry Jenstar, that you are having to deal with this situation.
Hope you manage to work it out. Id talk to John about bringing just one. Im sure that will change the dynamics

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star

Posted by Tamar on November 8, 2005, at 19:31:45

In reply to some girls I hate....advice???, posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 20:08:15

What an annoying situation! I agree with what other people have said... If you can limit ‘John’ to one girl at any occasion she might be more likely to behave more appropriately.

I think the thing I reacted to most strongly was that they flirt with other people's husbands and boyfriends... Now, I enjoy a good flirtation as much as the next pervert, but I think there are standards of decency to be observed... And excessive flirting in front of someone's partner is usually just rude.

And I have to admit I always feel discouraged when I see intelligent men fawning over foolish women who are just toying with them. (But to be fair, women are sometimes easily mesmerised by powerful, charming men.)

I find it hard to believe 'John' is playing hard to get, so I can't understand why he hasn't hooked up with one of them already. Unless they're stringing him along... Honestly, I think you'd be doing him a favour if you told him to pick one or drop all of them.

Tamar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet!

Posted by rainbowbrite on November 8, 2005, at 20:06:41

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet!, posted by rainbowbrite on November 8, 2005, at 16:35:15

RE: my previous post- I was having one of those impulsive overly-sensitive bad day moments. Sorry

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star

Posted by Larry Hoover on November 8, 2005, at 23:02:55

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » gardenergirl, posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 10:27:32

I gotta give you my gut reaction to this situation.....

> The problem with the girls is they are a "three pack" -- all best friends, roommates, etc. The go EVERYWHERE together. If one goes, they ALL go. And I think John probably wouldn't care that they bother me and others...he's interested in hooking up. And I hate to spoil HIS fun, since he seems to be having fun with them. But *I* don't have fun with them. And I wish my hubby would stay away. I guess that's the part that really bothers me. I'd be OK NOT hanging out with the group, but my hubby still wants to, even knowing how much the girls are awful, and even knowing that one of them dissed me behind my back while he was listening. :(
>
> JS

The hooking up thing....the girls go everywhere do everything together....if it gets to the hooking up part, what if they do that together, too? It's no place for your husband to be, to be around three girls who decide it's time to get it on.

Lar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Larry Hoover

Posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:23:28

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star, posted by Larry Hoover on November 8, 2005, at 23:02:55

hahaha, I agree! :) The weird thing is, I kind of think those girls WOULD be ok with a "4-way" with them and John.

I know they all like him, and it's almost like one of those bachelorette show things going on, where he decides which "lucky lady" he's going to choose. Even though I don't like the girls, I also think it's not fair of him to play around with them all, leading each one on a bit.

But maybe they're all the "share and share alike" kind of crew. I know they're a bit more free and easy with their lovin' than I ever was when single (from random comments they make.) Not that there's anything wrong with that! Just one less thing in common, I guess.

It's kind of like an (annoying) soap opera. I'd enjoy it better, though, if I didn't have to be "on set" when it played out!

JenStar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » rainbowbrite

Posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:28:42

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet!, posted by rainbowbrite on November 8, 2005, at 16:35:15

I use "like" a lot too, and I can enjoy a superficial coversation too! :)

It's just that these girls seem to really be no more than skin deep. I know that it's probably not true, but they are SO HARD to talk to. They are so cliquy and so rude. It's just so not fun to be around them, for me, anyway. :( I hate feeling that way. What free time I have, I don't want to spend being around people who make mean comments and are very exclusive.

Maybe the whole thing says more about ME and my issues than about THEM.

I know I'm probably over-whining about this. But the thing really bothers me, for some reason. I think it's the fact that guys DO go for young, pretty, giggly, flirty girls, no matter what else they have or lack. It makes all of my success and hard work and good qualities seem suddenly like pig swill or garbage. And I don't like feeling that way. I guess I'm really very insecure in some ways. :(

JS

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » allisonross

Posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:30:03

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » Jen Star, posted by allisonross on November 8, 2005, at 13:27:34

thanks for the support! :)
JenStar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Tamar

Posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:37:37

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star, posted by Tamar on November 8, 2005, at 19:31:45

hi Tamar,
thanks for the support! Sometimes I just need to rant it all out. I guess I'm not close enough to John to tell him how I really feel about it all, so I just b*8ch about it here. The whole vibe with him & the girls is very weird.

I like to flirt a bit too, and I think SOME flirting amongst married folks is harmless and fun. But the one girl (who wears very tight tank tops) likes to stand too close even by European standards, and rub her manicured hand up a guy's arm, and giggle into his face, and then whisper something into his ear, and then ask him to get her a drink, and then stroke his arm AGAIN.

I know this routine because I tried to send eye darts into her hand as it touched my husband's arm. I interceded and put MY arm through HIS arm to signal "off limits", at which point she pointedly rolled her eyes at me behind his back and made a noise through her mouth/teeth at me. Then she went over to her other girls and whispered to them, and they all giggled.

Then they went up to John and started touching his butt and talking about how nice his butt is, and giggled. Then they started flirting with another married guy and wondering aloud if they could drop ice-cubes into his pants.

Annoying!
anyway, that was more ranting. I'll stop now. I just wanted to complain about them all here. Thanks for listening!

JenSTar


 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???Yes, MORE, LOL » Jen Star

Posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 8:58:35

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Tamar, posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:37:37

> hi Tamar,
> thanks for the support! Sometimes I just need to rant it all out. I guess I'm not close enough to John to tell him how I really feel about it all, so I just b*8ch about it here.

How close do you need to be? LOL The whole vibe with him & the girls is very weird.
>
> I like to flirt a bit too, and I think SOME flirting amongst married folks is harmless and fun. But the one girl (who wears very tight tank tops) likes to stand too close even by European standards, and rub her manicured hand up a guy's arm, and giggle into his face, and then whisper something into his ear, and then ask him to get her a drink, and then stroke his arm AGAIN.

Well HE is the one who should put a stop to that, and if he doesn't (of course a man would LOVE that, but if he is married, he is being DISRESPECTFUL to his wife; a kind of cheating!)
>
> I know this routine because I tried to send eye darts into her hand as it touched my husband's arm. I interceded and put MY arm through HIS arm to signal "off limits", at which point she pointedly rolled her eyes at me behind his back and made a noise through her mouth/teeth at me.

DISRESPECT!

Eye darts or looks are useless with these tarts.

At THAT point (I am quite bold, but with class), I would have said: "your behavior is inappropriate and disrespectful.

You need to keep your hands to yourself.

This isn't---the PROM. If you refuse to behave,

I'm not interested in babysitting, and you will have to take your immaturity, ignorance and disrespect

and-- leave."

Then she went over to her other girls and whispered to them, and they all giggled.

Walk over and repeat the above.
>
> Then they went up to John and started touching his butt and talking about how nice his butt is, and giggled.

Where are you when this is going on? Someone's house?

If so, the owner of the house should say something; how embarrassing to have this going on.

Then they started flirting with another married guy and wondering aloud if they could drop ice-cubes into his pants.

Where is the wife when this is going on? I would turn a hose on those, ahhh...........rhymes with.....hose!
>
> Annoying!

It's BEYOND annoying; it is DISRESPECT. It should not be allowed. I'd tell my husband that if one of these chickies acts like that with him, and he doesn't put her in her place and stop it, then I (underline the word, I) will step in, and he might be sorry, LOL< LOL!!

> anyway, that was more ranting. I'll stop now. I just wanted to complain about them all here. Thanks for listening!
>

and P.S., as I said, you can't (unfortunately) count on guys to say anything, cause they are eating it up, so you women need to put a stop to their disgusting behavior.

There is no reason to allow this disrespect, and that is what it is.

They are getting away with it, because (it seems from the little you have said) no one is saying a word.

Arrghhhh, it makes me angry, and I am not even there., LOL

JenSTar
>
>
>

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » Jen Star

Posted by rainbowbrite on November 9, 2005, at 9:37:33

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » rainbowbrite, posted by Jen Star on November 8, 2005, at 23:28:42

Hey Jen Star, sorry that part was a response to Allison.

her response seemed harsh to me.

Its hard when you have to mix with people you dont like. I do understand that. I wasnt trying to negate your feelings at all. I Just wanted to point out that there were some overgeneralizations happening.

Its all about the company you enjoy being with and they have intruded upon your social life. It has changed the dynamics resulting in you not enjoying yourself. Taht isnt fair. Personally I would have a problem with having to separate my group of friends.
Is your husband willing to talk to John about it? If not maybe you could mention to John that it is overwhelming/annoying with so many hanging on his arms. I dont know, thats a yucky situation to be in

Good luck

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » rainbowbrite

Posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 14:22:16

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » Jen Star, posted by rainbowbrite on November 9, 2005, at 9:37:33

Hi, Jen: Sorry you thought my message was "harsh" I was simply venting, because i was resonating with her outrage, and can understand that stuff.

My point was those 'women' were/are being disrespectful, and it needs to be pointed out to them (in a respectful manner).

If I understood correctly, they were guests in someone's home. Their behavior (at the least, was inappropriate).

I try very hard not to criticize, etc......I have an incredible sensitivity to criticism (a childhood of abuse,

followed by 31 years of abusive marriage, and then abuse from my church who kicked me out because i got a divorce).

I am alone now for the 1st time in 31 years (for only 5 months now).

I am sitting here, feeling shame because of that word "harsh", because tears are rolling down my cheeks.

I feel shamed, even saying I feel shame.

None of you know me, but I would/could never do anything to offend or hurt anyone.

I don't think I feel "safe" to post anymore.

 

Just wanted to mention... » allisonross

Posted by Tamar on November 9, 2005, at 17:16:30

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice???/you bet! » rainbowbrite, posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 14:22:16

Hi Allison,

I think things might have become a bit confused here. JenStar didn’t say you were harsh, as far as I could tell.

I don’t know how Rainbowbrite felt, but I know I felt a little taken aback when you mentioned the thing about girls who use the word ‘like’ a lot… and who use the f-word. I probably reacted that way because I use the word ‘like’ a lot too (and I’m also a bit of a garbage mouth, though I try to keep it in check when I’m with people who find it offensive).

Maybe if you re-read your first post to JenStar you might understand why those of us who say ‘like’ could have been a bit surprised at your words.

I'm just mentioning this in the hope of clearing up any misunderstandings; it's meant in the gentlest possible way.

I know that people can say all kinds of things in the heat of the moment. But I’m sure that you didn’t intend to be critical of anyone here.

Tamar

 

Re: Just wanted to mention... » Tamar

Posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 18:00:49

In reply to Just wanted to mention... » allisonross, posted by Tamar on November 9, 2005, at 17:16:30

> Hi Allison,
>
> I think things might have become a bit confused here. JenStar didn’t say you were harsh, as far as I could tell.

yes, the posting was to (gosh, sorry, forgot her name, but the person who was talking about the girls all over their husbands, etc.), and (I believe it was her, unless I used the wrong name...said she thought my words were "harsh."

>
> I don’t know how Rainbowbrite felt, but I know I felt a little taken aback when you mentioned the thing about girls who use the word ‘like’ a lot… and who use the f-word. I probably reacted that way because I use the word ‘like’ a lot too (and I’m also a bit of a garbage mouth, though I try to keep it in check when I’m with people who find it offensive).

The thing of it is, when there are just words on a screen, it's hard to always understand. I use "like" too, but what I was referring to, was the University where I work, I hear girls of that age, and those are 2 words that are used constantly. Hey, I've started to use the F word...I just meant the students where I work use it 10 times in one sentence; kind of loses its' oooph!
>
> Maybe if you re-read your first post to JenStar you might understand why those of us who say ‘like’ could have been a bit surprised at your words.

Like (LOL) I said, I use "like" too. Sorry. I'm trying to explain, but don't seem to be doing a very good job.
>
> I'm just mentioning this in the hope of clearing up any misunderstandings; it's meant in the gentlest possible way.
>
> I know that people can say all kinds of things in the heat of the moment. But I’m sure that you didn’t intend to be critical of anyone here.

No, I definitely did not. My meaning was about the girls who were behaving so inappropriately with other women's husbands.

I apologize. I certainly did not mean to offend anyone, and I have always loved and admired your postings.
>
Thankyou, Tamar, for taking the time to write. I do appreciate it.

Smiles, Ally
> Tamar
>
>

 

Re: Just wanted to mention... » allisonross

Posted by Tamar on November 9, 2005, at 18:43:43

In reply to Re: Just wanted to mention... » Tamar, posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 18:00:49

> The thing of it is, when there are just words on a screen, it's hard to always understand. I use "like" too, but what I was referring to, was the University where I work, I hear girls of that age, and those are 2 words that are used constantly. Hey, I've started to use the F word...I just meant the students where I work use it 10 times in one sentence; kind of loses its' oooph!

I think maybe it’s a generational thing. I also work in a university and the students sometimes seem to have their own language that I’m too old for. But I’m too young for my parents’ language, with its words like ‘hip’ and ‘groovy’. I guess I’ll really start worrying when I can’t understand the students at all!

> No, I definitely did not. My meaning was about the girls who were behaving so inappropriately with other women's husbands.

Yes; I agree that the behaviour of those girls must be irritating to the men’s wives and partners.

> I apologize. I certainly did not mean to offend anyone, and I have always loved and admired your postings.

Thanks Ally :-)

Tamar

 

Re: Just wanted to mention... » allisonross

Posted by Jen Star on November 10, 2005, at 18:25:09

In reply to Re: Just wanted to mention... » Tamar, posted by allisonross on November 9, 2005, at 18:00:49

hi allison,
I know you were being supportive, and I didn't take anything the wrong way! Thanks for sticking up for me in post form. :) It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who hates those kind of girls.

I hope you're feeling better! Please don't let posts get to you. We're all pretty nice here, I think, but it's easy to read something into a post that wasn't intended.

take care of yourself!
JenStar

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star

Posted by TexasChic on November 13, 2005, at 19:13:16

In reply to some girls I hate....advice???, posted by Jen Star on November 7, 2005, at 20:08:15

Okay, I haven't read all the posts because there's 'like', alot them, and I'm fixing to have to go. (Intelligent girls use that word too, we originated it in the 80's). So if I repeat anything. I'm sorry. I just wanted to throw in my 2 cents.

First of all, I would go up to John and say, "Dude, these chics are so-o-o annoying! Do they really have to go 'everywhere' with us?" He can work on getting laid on his own time.

Second, about your husband. Try to imagine if it were 3 hot younger men one of your divorcee friends brought along. They're all pool boys or lifeguards, and have time to do nothing but workout and tan. Now, I'm not talking some frat guys who would be condescending and all, but some cute, boyish guys that think being with an older women is really freaking hot! And because they're young, you can't help thinking things like, "I bet he's like the energizer bunny... "

Your husband would HATE them. You however would probably enjoy the attention although you would never act on it. Its just a boost to the old ego. You'd tell your hubby, "Honey, they're harmless, just ignore them".

Anyway, the moral of that story is, your husband may enjoy the company and attention of these younger women, but its doesn't necessarily mean something bad. Everyone likes to have the ego stroked now and then.

Finally, try not to let the brat pack get under your skin. They're obviously enjoying the fact they are young and getting alot of attention because of it. But seriously, what 20 something girl hangs out with a bunch of 30 and 40 year olds? Why aren't they with guys their own age? They obviously have issues.

Hey, maybe if you get the women together and all hit on them, it may scare them away. Unless of course, it backfires and they're into it. But even then you're outdoing your husband.

-T

 

Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » TexasChic

Posted by Jen Star on November 14, 2005, at 18:37:31

In reply to Re: some girls I hate....advice??? » Jen Star, posted by TexasChic on November 13, 2005, at 19:13:16

hi Texas Chic,
your post made me laugh out loud! :) Thanks! I only wish they WERE three hot male lifeguards, in which case I WOULD be telling hubby that they are totally harmless. :)

I trust my hubby completely, and I know he's not into those women in any bad ways. And you're right...as a man, he just won't be able to see past the issue that is bugging me.

I'm not sure why they hang out with this group. I think it's b/c they like John so much, maybe? I'll try to be more laid back about it all, and see what happens. :)

JenStar


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