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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alesta on August 31, 2005, at 22:27:51
to anyone listening..:)..i'm in a real bind here and just need to get this off my chest..here goes..
since i broke up with my ex, i have started dating 3 guys at once...you would think this would be fun, right? it really sucks, because i have actually fallen in love with 2 of them (and am strongly attracted to but not in love with the third)..
the first one, we'll call him mike, is perfectly compatible with me, i have a feeling. our relationship is based on a strong friendship, and i am attracted to him. i know i would feel the most comfortable with him, which is really important to me..i know he would accept my faults and quirks more readily, which is essential, lol...
but then there's this other guy, we'll call him nathan, who is not so compatible in the long run, but i am crazy about him. i have a really strong attraction for him. i think he would be okay with staying friends..i am not sure he will understand about me ending up with the other guy, who i was dating first (nathan does know about mike). both mike and nathan want me to move in with them (i know..not necessarily a good idea to move so fast..anyway..) i just hate the thought of letting nathan go..it makes me so sad to think about it..i know the concept of male/female friendships might be a fallacy, but i am willing to do that, and i *think* nathan is, too...i just don't know. i am sad. i wonder if *I* will be okay with that.
now i know why i never really liked the idea of dating more than one guy at once..i am heartbroken that i have to let one go..it feels awful..it is the worst..i hope nathan will go for the whole friendship thing..or maybe something else will happen that's better than that..i'm not sure what i'm sayin'..anyway..thanks for listening.
love to ya,
amy :)
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on August 31, 2005, at 22:27:51
In reply to need to vent..dating sucks!.. :), posted by alesta on August 31, 2005, at 9:27:55
Posted by Dominique on August 31, 2005, at 22:27:51
In reply to need to vent..dating sucks!.. :), posted by alesta on August 31, 2005, at 9:27:55
Whether it be good friends or good se#, the nathan guy is obviously not good for the long haul. Mike, as you have already stated and probably already made up your mind about, is there for you for now and later... If it is his looks that make you question your relationship, remember that they don't last... if it is lack of or not the best se#, know that that doesn't last either. Dating 2-3 guys at once is never as "fun" as it seems... I know; but I can tell you that chosing the one most compatible with you now and later is usually the better guy. If "nathan" is who you truly were meant for, yet you feel stronger towards "mike" then later on "nathan" should still be there for you....
Ps. the longer you dwell and act [w/2-3 guys] on this subject, the worse it will be later...for YOU!
Smiles
Dom
Posted by alesta on September 17, 2005, at 11:35:32
In reply to Re: need to vent..dating sucks!.. :), posted by Dominique on August 31, 2005, at 20:58:09
thanks so much, dom!..i really apppreciate your response and very good advice.:-) well, i decided to go with mike, but have for several reasons lost my attraction to him..he has these ways about him that i didn't see before and i just don't feel the attraction anymore. so, i'm going to break it off with him (although i'm living with him right now and not totally financially independant at the moment, so it's a little tricky)..i feel horrible to have to end it with him..but i guess it's better to do it now than later..
i think i just want to be single for a while too..i think it's too soon after my last breakup to get so serious with someone..i feel anxious and trapped at the thought of being committed..and i was really was starting to enjoy my own company, lol, which took me a long time to be able to do..anyway..thanks again for your wonderful input and for listening!:-)
take good care,:)
amy
Posted by alesta on September 17, 2005, at 11:38:23
In reply to Send the extra guy my way!! :) (nm), posted by Emily Elizabeth on August 31, 2005, at 15:44:09
This is the end of the thread.
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