![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 33 to 57 of 57. Go back in thread:
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 19:07:34
In reply to Re: ((((((Alex)))))) ((((((Susan)))))) » Susan47, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 18:53:26
I'm sure me and Susan can bring you out of your shell ;-)
Posted by anastasia56 on April 24, 2005, at 19:08:31
In reply to Re: ((((((Alex)))))) ((((((Susan)))))) » Susan47, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 18:53:26
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 19:19:44
In reply to hmmmm...what to do what to do... (nm) » Damos, posted by anastasia56 on April 24, 2005, at 19:08:31
You
RUN LIKE HELL!!!
Mwah ha ha!
Posted by anastasia56 on April 24, 2005, at 19:35:04
In reply to Re: May I suggest » anastasia56, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 19:19:44
Posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 20:06:31
In reply to Re: Te he he » Damos, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 19:07:34
I don't doubt that for a second.
Posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 20:11:59
In reply to Re: May I suggest » anastasia56, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 19:19:44
Puppy jumped I laughed so loud. It's so nice to have the house all to myself for a change and have a work laptop that actually works so I can talk to you guys.
There's only one major problem with the cool room - shrinkge. Mind you, I could probably register the little guy as long term unemployed and get some sort of benefit!
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:11:11
In reply to Re: Te he he » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 20:06:31
Well you'll have to come out of the fridge then ;-)
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:13:32
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 20:11:59
> Puppy jumped I laughed so loud.
Yay! Puppy. Give Sarah a big hug from me, ok? Do you have any pictures of her? I'd love it if you could email me one.
>It's so nice to have the house all to myself for a change and have a work laptop that actually works so I can talk to you guys.
:-)
Yay. Its a holiday!
(I don't know if we are supposed to feel happy about that on ANZAC day)
But...
Yay. Its a holiday!
(Not that I have done anything for weeks now...)
> Mind you, I could probably register the little guy as long term unemployed and get some sort of benefit!HA! Oh Damos that made me laugh!
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:17:38
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:13:32
Posted by Susan47 on April 24, 2005, at 21:27:14
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:13:32
She's here, seconding Alexandra's Mwah-ha-ha!
Posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 21:29:21
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:13:32
> > Puppy jumped I laughed so loud.
>
> Yay! Puppy. Give Sarah a big hug from me, ok? Do you have any pictures of her? I'd love it if you could email me one.I absolutely will. Don't tell but I put a blanket up on the lounge last night so she could sit up there with me and watch telly. I'm sure I've got a bunch, just drop me a note to my address (I think I babblemailed it to you) and I'll send some over.
> >It's so nice to have the house all to myself for a change and have a work laptop that actually works so I can talk to you guys.
>
> :-)
> Yay. Its a holiday!
You have no idea.
> (I don't know if we are supposed to feel happy about that on ANZAC day)
> But...
> Yay. Its a holiday!
> (Not that I have done anything for weeks now...)
>
> > Mind you, I could probably register the little guy as long term unemployed and get some sort of benefit!
>
> HA! Oh Damos that made me laugh!
Yay!!!! that's more like it.
>
>
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:32:35
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha, posted by Susan47 on April 24, 2005, at 21:27:14
Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:34:14
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 21:29:21
> I absolutely will. Don't tell but I put a blanket up on the lounge last night so she could sit up there with me and watch telly.
:-)
Aw, you are so sweet.>I'm sure I've got a bunch, just drop me a note to my address (I think I babblemailed it to you) and I'll send some over.
Ok. I'll try. Otherwise I'll babblemail you my address.
> > HA! Oh Damos that made me laugh!
> Yay!!!! that's more like it.:-)
You are a riot!
Posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 22:17:35
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 21:34:14
> Aw, you are so sweet.
Shhhh, I can't have you spreading unfounded rumours like that, they'll ruin my self image :-)> You are a riot!
No, no you must have me confused with another Damos. I'm Damos the human sedative, guaranteed to put anyone to sleep with 5 minutes of contact =0)
Posted by sunny10 on April 25, 2005, at 8:56:03
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 22:17:35
might I presume to suggest that it is not actually the sex or sex chemical reaction that you people are "missing with regret", but the chemical that is released by close INTIMACY?
I tried to do what Alex has (and is thinking about maybe doing again). Doing that accomplished one of two terrible things for ME (maybe she is just much more mature than I....almost everyone seems to be...)
1) I felt like I was not worth a relationship (and this type of non-relationship simply bolstered my low opinion of myself. OR
2) I fell in love with the closeness that only ever existed in my mind... we'd start out as "friends with benefits", progress to affection and "sexually intimacy", and then with the affection chemicals being released, I would fall in love with them even though "I Knew" they were unavailable to me in one way or another and we'd never wind up together and my heart would be broken again, and my fear of abandonment would be realized as being abandoned again...Fill one hand with wishes and the other with sh*t and see which one fills up first, right?!? We'll just have to rely on our friendships here on Babble until we find that in our own hometowns... I feel so lucky to have "met" you guys; it feels almost selfish to hope for more!!
XOXOXOXOX,
sunny10
Posted by damos on April 25, 2005, at 21:17:40
In reply to Re: For the sexually inactive..., posted by sunny10 on April 25, 2005, at 8:56:03
You feel free to presume away.
There is a lot of truth and honesty in what you said. That hard afterwards realisation stuff that you've just gotta try to remember till next time you see yourself going there all over again.
... I feel so lucky to have "met" you guys; it feels almost selfish to hope for more!!
Ditto that.
>
> XOXOXOXOX,
> sunny10Big hugs and kisses right back atya sunny.
Posted by 10derHeart on April 26, 2005, at 0:13:14
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on April 24, 2005, at 22:17:35
>> I'm Damos the human sedative, guaranteed to put anyone to sleep with 5 minutes of contact =0)
I highly doubt that. I'm quite, VERY wide awake.
I like this thread. Maybe too much.
Oh dear. (yikes!)
Posted by alexandra_k on April 26, 2005, at 0:28:30
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by 10derHeart on April 26, 2005, at 0:13:14
Posted by sunny10 on April 26, 2005, at 12:40:37
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by 10derHeart on April 26, 2005, at 0:13:14
Posted by sunny10 on April 26, 2005, at 12:43:44
In reply to Re: For the sexually inactive... » sunny10, posted by damos on April 25, 2005, at 21:17:40
yeah, I've been there so many times that I have had to change my concept of my intelligence...
A high IQ certainly didn't make me a fast study on this subject...I had to learn THAT one over and over and over... sigh...
For some reason, I always had to learn the hard way...
XOXOX
sunny10
Posted by Damos on April 26, 2005, at 17:41:57
In reply to Re: before we go there again » damos, posted by sunny10 on April 26, 2005, at 12:43:44
Yeah, I tend to to think my entire life has only served to prove all the tests wrong. Reminds me of a quote.
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning." - Catherine Aird
I'm more of a horrendous warning though. The Buddhists believe that life will present you with the same lesson over and over until you learn it. Boy I must be in the dumb *ss class then.
Here's hoping for good loving for us all - sooner rather than later.
xxxxx(((((Sunny)))))xxxxx
Posted by Damos on April 26, 2005, at 17:44:29
In reply to Re: May I suggest -Mwah ha ha » Damos, posted by 10derHeart on April 26, 2005, at 0:13:14
Is there such a thing as too much? Glad you're enjoying it, anything I can do to add to your enjoyment???????
Posted by sunny10 on April 27, 2005, at 8:43:06
In reply to Re: before we go there again » sunny10, posted by Damos on April 26, 2005, at 17:41:57
I think that's right; that we have to "do it 'til we learn to do it right" no matter what "it" is...
I feel like your quote, but WANT to "do it right" this time...
I had a very interesting email conversation with a friend of mine. She has been in the US for eighteen years, but was raised in Moscow. As is my usual way, I meandered through my "point", being unable to state succintly what I was feeling/thinking, but she managed to get my point (amazing considering English is her second language- and I have trouble enough with it as my FIRST!). She summed up my point in four sentences.
I want to be honest with my SO if there is any chance of a future with him. No game playing, that is. But I won't tell him how much I miss having him around and sleeping next to me at night. Because to admit that "neediness" beyond a simple "I miss you" would only lead him to believe I would take him back without him making the changes he needs to make to act like a grown-up! And that would lead me to making the same mistakes again, thus not having "learned the lesson".
Another lesson that I need to learn is that I CAN be alone without being lonely. I have to be strong; and as "grown-up" against my neediness as he needs to be "grown-up" enough to be able to communicate with words instead of aggression, like kids on the schoolyard!! Or twenty year-olds at a bar!!
And so I begin...
Maybe this time I can get it right
Posted by damos on April 27, 2005, at 21:53:33
In reply to Re: before we go there again, posted by sunny10 on April 27, 2005, at 8:43:06
Dearest Sunny,
I'm not sure that anything in life is about getting it 'right'. I think it's about learning to just accept it for what it is with no expectation or attachment, no wishing, hoping and dreaming it to be, just simply as it is.
This applies to people too, and I know I've been guilty of taking people and running them through my internal imaging software and morphing them into something they are not even aware of, let alone have any hope of being. Sadly I do a similar thing to myself only the image that I create is one that I have to constantly create new and excruciating ways of living down to. the real problem being when I begin to believe this image to be me 'true' self. Another added bonus being the totality with which I assign blame and responsibility for anything and everything to me (well I am the only constant aren't I?), completely absolving others of any contribution or responsibilty. But no more.
In the last 12 mths or so I have been trying really hard to stop labeling stuff as good/bad, right/wrong, etc, etc. I've also tried to stop assuming that there needs to be guilt or blame associated with everything. It's amazing how much easier things become when you stop loading every situation and event with life and death importance. It's also amazing how much more stable your self image becomes when it's not entirely dependent on other peoples actions, reactions and interactions with you. A simple example is that now I can just think it would be nice to get an email or whatever from anyone just to say G'day or whatever, whereas not so very long ago the fact that I never got anything from anyone used to crush me on a daily basis to the point where is sometimes wouldn't even logonto my email because I couldn't bear to see another day with nothing there but more work. Something else I'm trying to stop doing is making excuses for others behaviour toward me. They are responsible for it, and I am only responsible for how I choose to feel about and respond to it.
Well now that my train of though is well and truly derailed I think I'll shut up. Just know I'm very proud to be your friend and always sending you the very best of wishes.
XOXOXOX
Damos
Posted by sunny10 on April 28, 2005, at 10:41:57
In reply to Re: before we go there again » sunny10, posted by damos on April 27, 2005, at 21:53:33
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Relationships | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.