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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 13:49:43
i feel sooo sad. my bf has been a real jerk today..i woke up to hear him singing loudly over and over "you're no good, you're no good, bit#@, you're no good" happily. this is so crazy. i've been planning on leaving him for a while but for financial reasons was going to wait. now my bf says today "why don't you go stay at your mother's for a while" (he knows that isn't happening, though--she's meaner than he is) and is making inferences to me leaving. he's been mentally torturing me a lot lately. i feel so unwanted, so unvalidated. *i* was supposed to break up with *him*. he's been really abusive and puts me down constantly and is a crack addict and does heroin, but at least i always thought he still wanted me. i feel sad. now i don't even get the satisfaction of being the one to end this thing. i feel so unloved and unvalued and alone. i've never been really loved except by boyfriends when i was a teenager, and my brother. since then all i've been with is jerks. i want to be able to be happy by myself..i want to be able to rely on myself for happiness..i don't know if this is possible or not..i just want someone to think i'm special, or be special to them, i guess. maybe when my finances are situated i will be content being alone, as i'll have things to occupy myself. thanks for listening.
amy
Posted by partlycloudy on October 10, 2004, at 14:26:07
In reply to jerk boyfriend ramblings, posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 13:49:43
Ha! I have always resented the fact that my ex husband divorced me before I had the chance to divorce him - by about 5 minutes. But then: he was always the victim, never the perpetrator, that was his motto. I still count myself lucky that I got away. He was still proclaiming his undying love for at the courthouse. HELLO!! You Divorced Me!!! I am still recovering from those years - 18 years of which and I should have run away after the first 10 of them.
Don't wait for him to be nice to you, to validate your feelings. Look after yourself right now, if you can.
Posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 18:45:35
In reply to Re: jerk boyfriend ramblings » alesta, posted by partlycloudy on October 10, 2004, at 14:26:07
don't ya just hate it when they beat you to the punch? actually, there is a level of relief there, because then i don't have to hurt his feelings by breaking up with him (isn't that nuts? i still care deeply about his feelings! hahahahaha i must be crazy) sorry. i'm back. anyway, now he's being like totally nice to me..he really likes toying with me, i think. he's gotten really good at it. i'm doing better now. thanx for listening..i just have to unload this stuff. :)amy :)
Posted by partlycloudy on October 10, 2004, at 19:04:01
In reply to Re: jerk boyfriend ramblings » partlycloudy, posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 18:45:35
UNLOADING
Posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 20:03:58
In reply to beep! beep! beep!, posted by partlycloudy on October 10, 2004, at 19:04:01
Posted by saw on October 11, 2004, at 1:48:34
In reply to beep! beep! beep!, posted by partlycloudy on October 10, 2004, at 19:04:01
Hiya Amy
I think it is pretty clear from all you have written about this man, that the last thing to be hurt are his feelings. If you had the strength, you have broken up with him by now and the only thing that would be hurt would be his selfish, ugly ego.
Was I being way too harsh here my friend? I do not mean to be like that. I am concerned about the way you self worth is all but non-existant because of what this brute is doing to you. He sounds so much like my ex husband, I now have to look out for two creepy crawlies over my shoulder.
Hope you're doing a bit better to today and I am so sorry you have to go through all of this.
Sabrina
(PS Singing what he was, was a shallow, underhanded way to try and hurt you!)
Posted by saw on October 11, 2004, at 3:08:05
In reply to Re: beep! beep! beep! » partlycloudy, posted by saw on October 11, 2004, at 1:48:34
Posted by moime on October 11, 2004, at 6:13:08
In reply to jerk boyfriend ramblings, posted by alesta on October 10, 2004, at 13:49:43
I know how you feel. Why can't we be happy with who we are, why can't who we are support us through these terrible relationships? OK, who are we? Have we really developed ourselves...do we support our own dreams and values? I know this is hard too, do we have hope or do we just think negatively. I am trying to have hope...trying to fulfil my dreams even though everything pops up in front of my face to deter me or make me discouraged. This last bad relationship kicked my butt, I have very little self-esteem, and for the last week (since breakup), I have had to dig really dip to look for what is left over in me, the real basics. I am building from that. And it ain't easy, being alone. You've got to break away from whatever it is that is holding you back from discovering what you are missing, that's for sure...and try to stay on track to finding out what and who you are. Abusive relationships...they just control you and narrow you down to a little piece of flesh with no mind, one that gets walked over and driving into the ground. I am resolved that won't happen again. Courage is definately needed.
Posted by alesta on October 11, 2004, at 11:23:48
In reply to Re: jerk boyfriend ramblings, posted by moime on October 11, 2004, at 6:13:08
thank you so much sabrina and moime for responding, and nice to meet you, moime!:) things are going really well today, and i'm trying not to get back to focusing on this stuff at the moment, or i'd write more, as i'm afraid i'll get depressed again (i usually like to give detailed replies to ppl who've kindly taken their time to respond to me). so i just want to say thanks!:):) something strange happened to my mindset yesterday..i'm feeling more positive and playful..can't explain it..i'm doing much better! take care, y'all!
amy :)
Posted by alesta on October 11, 2004, at 11:59:06
In reply to Re: jerk boyfriend ramblings » moime, posted by alesta on October 11, 2004, at 11:23:48
This is the end of the thread.
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