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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on September 22, 2007, at 23:40:00
As some of you know, I recently moved and left my beloved T of 6 years. I miss her sooo much. She did reply to the letter that I sent her which made me very happy.
Anyway, I decided to find a T in this new city. It was totally strange to see a new person after all this time. The new T was pretty cool and I do feel like I can click with her. It was funny though. She is much more self-disclosing than my old T. For example, in the LAST session my old T mentioned that her parents didn't really understand therapy. Well, in the FIRST session my new T told me the same thing! Funny, huh?
The one thing that bugs me about new T is that she can't see me next week and the following week can only see me at an inconvienent time. I'm used to seeing my old T 2x/week at the same time every week. Oh well.
Anyone else have experiences transitioning to a new T? Words of wisdom?
Best,
EE
Posted by Dinah on September 23, 2007, at 12:29:31
In reply to New T, posted by Emily Elizabeth on September 22, 2007, at 23:40:00
Is something going on with her right now? Or are her scheduling problems chronic? My therapist on occasion has times when he is extremely erratic with his schedule. It is not at all good for me. Just a heads up on that topic.
I saw two different therapists while mine was gone. Neither were good long term fits for me. So I suppose my main thought would be to realize that one session or six sessions or however many is not a commitment. It's ok to "date" a therapist to see if they're worth a long term commitment.
That being said, it's good that you're feeling that you're clicking with her. I hope she ends up being a good long term choice.
I did like the way I got a new perspective on things with one of the two substitute therapists. After a long time with one therapist, you can get in the habit of viewing things in one way, and a new therapist can point out a new way of thinking.
I'm glad you're willing to wade into the water again. That says a lot of good things about the relationship your previous therapist and you built.
Posted by Dory on September 23, 2007, at 13:20:54
In reply to New T, posted by Emily Elizabeth on September 22, 2007, at 23:40:00
i had to switch from a T i was seriously attached to (quite frankly i was completely crushed on him) and go to someone new... it was all out of my hands. i don't know... i don't think i have dealt with it at all really. i just never looked back.. probably because it hurts so much still. i hadn't been seeing him that long and i want him to know how much i cared, but also the things he did that hurt me.
If you ended on a good note with the former T then that will help a LOT. It sounds like you did... and it is so very nice that she wrote to you. One thing i would try to avoid is writing her frequently because it can become habit forming and be unproductive for the new relationship... and eventually you'll hit a boundary and it will hurt. An occasional progress note or something would serve you better. i am thinking that's what i will do eventually, a sort of "here's where i am at" sort of thing.
one thing i did for the new T was write down what i had learned about myself from the former therapy sessions. i condensed it so that we would spend less time just rehashing and getting to know each other. i gave him as much inside track as i could.
i also had to really get it in my head that he was not the old T. He was going to be a whole new person. That was hard because i wanted my old T.
You sound like you are in a far better position than i was during this. You sound great actually.
on the getting to know thing... OTOH you might want to really take some time just being very light in the sessions, just like almost having coffee with someone... conversational... just to kind of breed familiarity.
that's what i would do... but i don't know a whole lot so take it for what it's worth :o)
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