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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
I want to give you an update on my Therapist, Dr. P, who suddenly became ill with a brain abcess and ended up on life support for about 3 weeks back in early Nov, 2006. At the time, and even since I have received messages of support, concern and encouragement that helped me so much as I struggled to deal with finding myself suddenly and unexpectedly cut off from weekly therapy (for 5+ years) and very upset and concered that my dear Dr. P might die. As many of you may remember, he's young- the picture of health and all of a sudden he was faced with the grim reality of death multple times during that initial 3 weeks. He was not expected to survive. My pdoc, although I love him dearly, is no therapist (even though he thinks he is!) so seeing him weekly through this ordeal didn't help me much in that area, but it did keep me on my meds and made me comfortable that there was someone there if I really needed help. When I last posted on this, I think that I may have mentioned that he had survived the initial trauma of the abcess and 2 surgeries done on an emergency basis only to find that he had residual speech deficits, especially in the area of "word searching". So he was going to start aggressive Speech Therapy the first part of December.
Well, this coming Monday 3/12 I have an appt to see Dr. P!!!! That's right, he's coming back to his practice. He's only going to be seeing 4-6 patients a week for awhile since I've heard that he tires really easily. He called me a week ago, and he sounded exactly like his old self to me. I didn't notice any difficulties with his speech. He speaks just as rapidly as previously and has been able to retain his outrageous sense of humor. I had been worried that he might have changed to the point where we wouldn't "click" anymore, but I think that has been addressed by his call. We talked about alot of things in a call that lasted almost an hour, and he told me alot of what had happened to him, and it was as bad as I had imagined.
I had sent him really funny and sometimes outrageously stupid (I thought) cards every week while he was gone. I also sent him the Sigmund Freud and OCD Man Action figures to play with. In the more outrageous cards I would tell him that the only way that I would stop sending them was for him to "get the hell better"! I decorated the envelopes of some with stickers and obnoxiouis and tacky stuff so that it would make him cringe when he got it in the mail. (WOrked like a charm!) I tried to be his court jester, since I could do nothing else to help him. I think that I did this for me also, because it helped me keep it real that he was alive and had survived, and hopefully one day would be better. I made sure that anything that I wrote him was funny, or of a light subject matter. Unfortunately, I hear that he's reviewing my (enormous) chart with the weekly visits with my pdoc (hereby referred to as "Therapy-NOT"!)to get caught up with all of the crappy stuff that's happened with me since he's been gone. So, now he's going to know that my life wasn't so funny and lighthearted during his absence, and I'm kind of feeling bad about burdening him with that, because the past 5 months have been very challenging for me.
I would really like to thank you all again for your kindness and support at the time that Dr. P became critically ill and beyond, and just thought you might to hear some good news- it's actually a miraculous recovery worthy of being shared and celebrated!
In closing, I would like to share with you something that Dr. P wrote and sent to all of his patients a couple of weeks ago,as he was contemplating coming back to his practice. I hope that you will find these words as meaningful as I did! You can "hear" what a life altering experience this has been for him, and his attempt to make it into something positive for others....
"A Different View of Adversity" by Dr. P
"In the face of adversity, life can seem so cruel, so cold, so unfair, and so unforgiving- no one is exempt. But the adversities of life can teach us many things. Our hardship engenders strength and fortitude; our trials and pain teach us empathy and forgiveness. Through our abject despair and hopelessness we learn wisdom and how to have peace; through longsuffering we aquire patience, and through our healing we are taught how to be humble and grateful. And then we are closer to love more, to cherish more, to adore more, to give more, to accept more, to laugh more, to cry more, to feel more, and to do all of these things relentlessly."Many thanks and best regards to you all. I'm really looking forward to my appt on Monday!
/m
Posted by jammerlich on March 10, 2007, at 14:34:07
In reply to Update on my T who was critically ill in the fall., posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
I'm so happy to hear you'll be seeing him on Monday!! That is such good news. Does it feel good knowing that YOU are one of only 4-6 patients who will get to see him next week? I think I'd be elated.
It was really lovely of you to send him uplifting cards on a regular basis. And I think seeing your chart and knowing things weren't easy for you during those months will only make him appreciate them more. You had the opportunity to put your stuff aside and be there, in a way, for your T. I think that's a fantasy a lot of us have. Now, I'm not saying I'd want to be in your shoes. It must have been a horrible, horrible experience. And I'm happy keeping it a fantasy if making it a reality means I'd have to go through what you went through!
Please let us know how Monday goes, if you can. I'm eagerly anticipating your appt. right along with you!
Posted by Honore on March 10, 2007, at 17:10:59
In reply to Update on my T who was critically ill in the fall., posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
That's an amazing story that the two of you have.
It's encouraging that you'll be seeing your T, and that he survived so many things-- and that you did, too.
I'm so surprised that his health was so precarious while you were hearing reassuring reports-- despite your concerns and doubts-- and that your doubts were so justified.
It's touching and just really great that this is how it's turning out.
Honore
Posted by annierose on March 10, 2007, at 17:32:19
In reply to Update on my T who was critically ill in the fall., posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
I am so glad you posted your update. And happy that you will soon be seeing him again as your t. It must warm your heart that you had a special place in his recovery. I love the idea of you sending him those cards - extremely thoughtful and tender.
I smiled reading his note to his clients. If you thought your therapist was special before his brain injury, he will be even more of everything now. His heart is open.
Remember that therapy is about you, although I'm sure he'll need to reassure you of that and of his continued good health.
Let us know how your session is on Monday.
Thank you - I did remember your original post.
Posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 17:35:39
In reply to Yay!!!! » RN320, posted by jammerlich on March 10, 2007, at 14:34:07
Thanks for your kind and supportive words. I feel very honored that he's chosen me as one of the first patients that will be seeing him weekly. He had mentioned to me on the phone that there were some patients that had really tried to manipulate and pull some crazy stunts during his recovery (designed to get his attention) and that he knew that he could not deal with them in his current status. He said that it's really hard, because as a T you can't possibly like every patient that you're treating, but you also have a responsibility to provide treatment. He said that his current limitations make it easy to keep the most difficult patients for him to handle at bay until he's feeling comfortable to take them all back on. He told me that his decision on who he would work with right away was based on need (which means he's read at least parts of my chart). He also sent me an email telling me that he had spoken with my pdoc about the "beyond excruciating" pain that I'm in (and not handling very well). It's nice that my docs all tell me that I'm not being a baby; that trigeminal neuralgia is one of the most painful conditions that exist, but other than all kinds of major Schedule II drugs that don't work very well, no one's been able to tell me how to cope with this horriffic pain. I was so relieved to hear from him about this because he said that he'd be coordinating with my pdoc and Internist as of MOnday on how I'm managing, and that he felt that he could help me with coping strategies. He said that he would work along with everyone else to make sure that I get the best pain management possible, since this type of pain has really had an effect on the depression and I've had a big increase in suicidal ideation when I'm getting hit with these waves of pain all in a row. I know that he'll be able to help me, and I'm so relieveed that I get to see him on Monday. He's a great guy as well as a T (at least I think so.)
I'll try to remember to post the results of my appt with him on Monday.
Thanks again,
/m
Posted by Iwillsurvive on March 10, 2007, at 18:51:09
In reply to Re: Yay!!!! » jammerlich, posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 17:35:39
Posted by Dinah on March 11, 2007, at 11:30:39
In reply to Update on my T who was critically ill in the fall., posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
I've thought of you often, and wondered how your situation worked out. I'm so glad he pulled through and is coming back.
I think your response to him was wonderful, and I hope that, God Forbid, anything like that ever happens that I could handle it as graciously.
I'm afraid I'd be more like his other clients though. :( I hope he can keep it in his heart to remember that they were responding out of fear not maliciousness.
Posted by Phillipa on March 11, 2007, at 13:24:51
In reply to Re: Update on my T who was critically ill in the f » RN320, posted by Dinah on March 11, 2007, at 11:30:39
Finally found your update so glad you're going to be one of his first patients and you deserve it. You've also done very well. Love Phillipa
Posted by RN320 on March 11, 2007, at 19:53:36
In reply to Re: Update on my T who was critically ill in the f » RN320, posted by Dinah on March 11, 2007, at 11:30:39
Hi Dinah- Thanks for your message. I remember that you had so many supportive things to say to me when ths happened. It's been a really rough few months, and it wasn't easy trying to be Dr. P's "court jester".
His comments to me about other patients were a surprise to me- not what he had to say, but that he mentioned them. He's never mentioned one other patient to me in >5 yrs. I'm sure that he understands the reason behind some of the hi-jinks, and I've never found him to be anything other than compassionate and kind, so I don't doubt for a minute that his other patients are treated just like me. I think that what he was trying to say is that he really needs to pay close attention to taking care of himself- not get over-stressed, etc. but still has to find a way to care for everyone. He had also mentioned to me that keeping some of his more difficult patients at a distance a little longer would hopefully not hurt their feelings as many others (that aren't difficult) are going to be waiting until he has the stamina to get back to his practice full time.
If you only knew the restraint I had to put on myself- what I would have liked to have done was to make him dinner and bake him cookies- something a little more personal, but I kept telling myself that it wasn't cool, or my role to do that. But it was hard still.......
Thanks again, Dinah, for keeping me in your thoughts. I hope that this nightmare is really going to be over, and that he doesn't relapse. I don't feel comfortable talking to him about anything related to my feelings about his illness, as I don't want to say anything that may inadvertantly upset him. I also don't want to unload on him all of the things that I've been saving up since he got sick- and there's an awful lot. I feel like I'd be "dumping" on him, and again- I don't want to do anything that may be harmful to him as he continues to recover and gain strength. Maybe I'll just stick with the present pressing issues and leave the other stuff for another time? Yet I want so much to talk to him..... I'll let you know how my appt goes tomorrow.
/m
Posted by Dinah on March 12, 2007, at 10:31:07
In reply to Re: Update on my T who was critically ill in the f » Dinah, posted by RN320 on March 11, 2007, at 19:53:36
I can understand your desire to take care of him, and go easy on him, and not overburden him. I don't think it would make for good therapy for the rest of your therapy, but it doesn't seem harmful short term. Right now the main thing is probably to reassure yourself and to reestablish the relationship. As you gain confidence in his ability to cope, you'll probably feel freer to talk to him about whatever you need to talk to him about.
I'm looking forward to knowing how things go.
Posted by RN320 on March 12, 2007, at 16:04:38
In reply to Update on my T who was critically ill in the fall., posted by RN320 on March 10, 2007, at 14:09:17
Well, I just got home from my appointment with Dr. P. It went incredibly well- we just kind of picked up where we left off, except we were talking about "now" issues for me out of need. He's the same old Dr.P. He looks thinner, but says that he's at his highest weight ever as an adult- says that the reason he looks thiner is that he's lost a lot of muscle mass because he hasn't been doing anything physical for these last several months. (He used to be a serious runner.) He said that he's got more energy being back to work, and it sure looked like it to me. It was just so comfortable- just like it was before he became ill. I thought that I'd need time to re-connect with him (and him with me) but it seems to me that we were never disconnected, if that makes sense? He actually kept me for 90 minutes (can you believe that??!! And I'm only getting billed for the usual 1 hour session!)because I've got some serious stuff going on in my life right now. I actually reminded him that the "hour" was almost up and he laughed and said- that's MY job to watch the clock....don't worry about it!"
I feel such a sense of relief and comfort having seen him in person and had the opportunity to talk to him again.
So, that's my story!
/m
Posted by Phillipa on March 12, 2007, at 18:00:03
In reply to I had my appt. today with Dr. P!!!!, posted by RN320 on March 12, 2007, at 16:04:38
M sounds like a great session to me. And so glad to hear he is happy and getting better. I will e-mail you soon. Love Jan
Posted by TherapyGirl on March 12, 2007, at 19:19:05
In reply to I had my appt. today with Dr. P!!!!, posted by RN320 on March 12, 2007, at 16:04:38
That's wonderful, RN. I'm so pleased for you and I can imagine how grateful you are to have him back. And I would add that you didn't have to reconnect because of the work you did in keeping connected while he was out. WAY TO GO!
Posted by Dinah on March 13, 2007, at 14:15:41
In reply to I had my appt. today with Dr. P!!!!, posted by RN320 on March 12, 2007, at 16:04:38
I'm so happy for you! :)
Posted by annierose on March 16, 2007, at 6:47:55
In reply to I had my appt. today with Dr. P!!!!, posted by RN320 on March 12, 2007, at 16:04:38
It is amazing how those feelings and connections are still there. It gives testament how real this therapeutic relationship is even though it is bound by different rules of engagement.
I'm so glad he is back at work and healthy!!
This is the end of the thread.
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