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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 53 to 77 of 283. Go back in thread:
Posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 0:40:12
In reply to She said yes? Cooool, Dr. Bob. And thanks. » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 0:35:20
Doesn't the end of July sound better for Deborah Lott to be a guest expert so that everyone can have a chance to read?
I don't want to answer for everyone.
Posted by All Done on May 6, 2005, at 1:19:09
In reply to How about the rest of you?, posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 0:40:12
> Doesn't the end of July sound better for Deborah Lott to be a guest expert so that everyone can have a chance to read?
>Putting my own anxiousness (is that a word?) aside, I think the end of July sounds best so everyone who wants can have a chance to read her book before she's here.
Posted by annierose on May 6, 2005, at 6:14:52
In reply to Re: How about the rest of you?, posted by All Done on May 6, 2005, at 1:19:09
That is so cool! Now we are setting a standard for every book we'll read. We'll have to insist on an author discussion as well :)
Oprah has nothing on us!
Posted by gardenergirl on May 6, 2005, at 7:29:15
In reply to She said yes? Cooool, Dr. Bob. And thanks. » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 0:35:20
Dinah, that's great! What a great idea you had, and way to follow through.
Thanks Dr. Bob for making it happen.
gg
Posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 17:33:50
In reply to Re: She said yes? Cooool, Dr. Bob. And thanks. » Dinah, posted by gardenergirl on May 6, 2005, at 7:29:15
Yes, end of July makes sense.
Dinah, you are amazing!
Posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 17:35:07
In reply to Yeah, Dinah!!!, posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 17:33:50
Late July is perfect for me - my therapist will be on vacation. That's when I carry her book around with me anyway!
Posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 18:21:42
In reply to Re: Yeah, Dinah!!!, posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 17:35:07
(Probably annoyingly so)
I've been wriggling all over with excitement and thumping my leg on the floor.
I'm glad the timing works out well for you. I think that's a perfect thing to be thinking about when those darn old therapists desert us to go have a relaxing time. :)
I brought "In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists" in to my session today to share my excitement with my therapist. We ended up talking about how many of us thought it should be required reading, along with the Psychology Board. Except for him of course, re. the Psychology Board. He's ok with my talking about him here, not always nicely. He says it's good that I have somewhere to process therapy. So I pointed out the part in the book that said that. :)) He seemed sort of interested, and there's at least a snowball's chance in h*ll that he'll read it himself someday.
But here's the other part that I'm soooo pleased with me about. Get ready?!!!
I told him I couldn't loan him my copy because he never returned my copy of that book that I lent him when he agreed to read it for his usual session fee per hour because it was so important to me. I thought I'd never ever ever ever have the nerve to mention that!!!
Ooooh, my pleasure with myself is ever so great this week. If you add it to my pride at the hard work I did in therapy, I just may become insufferable. I haven't felt this dang good about myself since my Wunderkind years.
Posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 18:35:42
In reply to I'm soooooo pleased with me!! » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 18:21:42
You are making me grin!
Face it - you are GOOD.
Posted by annierose on May 6, 2005, at 22:52:16
In reply to I'm soooooo pleased with me!! » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 18:21:42
Way to go Dinah - what was his reaction when you mentioned the book? Did he sheepishly admit to putting the book in a pile of forgotten reading material?
Posted by Dinah on May 6, 2005, at 23:17:53
In reply to Re: I'm soooooo pleased with me!! » Dinah, posted by annierose on May 6, 2005, at 22:52:16
Posted by 10derHeart on May 7, 2005, at 0:06:28
In reply to Re: I'm soooooo pleased with me!! » Dinah, posted by fallsfall on May 6, 2005, at 18:35:42
Posted by gardenergirl on May 10, 2005, at 14:34:26
In reply to Yes! D*mn good, amazing Dinah! (nm) » fallsfall, posted by 10derHeart on May 7, 2005, at 0:06:28
I didn't open it yet, because I was absorbed with my school work, but it's here!
We are here, we are here, we are here!
(sorry, I'm in a Who-ish mood.)
gg
Posted by Susan47 on May 10, 2005, at 19:28:28
In reply to Re: Looks like In Session?, posted by Dr. Bob on May 5, 2005, at 22:19:09
Okay that does it now I'm returning my library copy and buying the book .. Lott a guest expert? Oh, my.
Posted by LadyBug on May 11, 2005, at 13:19:37
In reply to Re: Looks like In Session?, posted by Susan47 on May 10, 2005, at 19:28:28
I'm so excited to have Lott be a guest!!!! I love this book. I have about worn my copy out from all the reading. I wish more books were written from the clients perspective.
Maybe we should all get together and compose a book with our experience of our therapy or therapists.LadyBug
Posted by Dinah on May 12, 2005, at 21:36:50
In reply to Re: Looks like In Session?, posted by LadyBug on May 11, 2005, at 13:19:37
Or start Sunday. I suppose I'd better start reading.
Posted by Dinah on May 13, 2005, at 17:55:39
In reply to So should we wait till Monday?, posted by Dinah on May 12, 2005, at 21:36:50
Posted by Tamar on May 13, 2005, at 18:39:20
In reply to So should we wait till Monday?, posted by Dinah on May 12, 2005, at 21:36:50
> Or start Sunday. I suppose I'd better start reading.
My copy hasn't arrived yet, though I ordered it ages ago. Sigh. But I can catch up.
Posted by gardenergirl on May 13, 2005, at 18:41:54
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday? » Dinah, posted by Tamar on May 13, 2005, at 18:39:20
Posted by Dinah on May 14, 2005, at 10:37:05
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday? » Dinah, posted by Tamar on May 13, 2005, at 18:39:20
Rats.
I'd rather everyone had their books in, but I guess the intro and chapter one aren't that long, so anyone who joins us along the way can probably catch up.
In fact that's probably important for those friends who are just about to discover Babble... and us. We'd love to have them join in.
I'll try to post excerpts so you can follow?
Posted by Tamar on May 14, 2005, at 16:05:47
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday? » Tamar, posted by Dinah on May 14, 2005, at 10:37:05
> Rats.
>
> I'd rather everyone had their books in, but I guess the intro and chapter one aren't that long, so anyone who joins us along the way can probably catch up.
>
> In fact that's probably important for those friends who are just about to discover Babble... and us. We'd love to have them join in.Well, if my experience reading Yalom is anything to go by, I'll probably read Lott cover to cover as soon as I get it. Then I guess I can re-read it more slowly. So catching up shouldn't be a problem.
> I'll try to post excerpts so you can follow?
That would be great. Thanks.
I'm really looking forward to this!
Posted by daisym on May 14, 2005, at 17:50:43
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday? » Dinah, posted by Tamar on May 14, 2005, at 16:05:47
I've been rereading today -- and there are sentences or paragraphs that strike me. Are we going to post questions of each other or our observations? Or both? (Yes, I need my life planned out 10 years in advance and I need to get an A!)
Also, I thought it would be great if we could try to meet in Open and chat once in awhile. We could try to pick a time kind of in the middle of East/West Coasts. Or Saturday mornings. I'm open to suggestions.
Posted by Dinah on May 15, 2005, at 7:59:43
In reply to How are we going to do this?, posted by daisym on May 14, 2005, at 17:50:43
> I've been rereading today -- and there are sentences or paragraphs that strike me. Are we going to post questions of each other or our observations? Or both? (Yes, I need my life planned out 10 years in advance and I need to get an A!)
>
Not sure. Anything goes? Both or either or anything anyone else thinks to do?> Also, I thought it would be great if we could try to meet in Open and chat once in awhile. We could try to pick a time kind of in the middle of East/West Coasts. Or Saturday mornings. I'm open to suggestions.
>
>That sounds like a great idea! My new computer doesn't do chat all that well (something about Microsoft and Java), but I'm willing to give it a shot.
Posted by All Done on May 16, 2005, at 11:00:25
In reply to So should we wait till Monday?, posted by Dinah on May 12, 2005, at 21:36:50
Hmmmpfff. I've lost my book. I have one more place I can think of to check for it tonight. If I don't find it there, I'll get a new copy tomorrow and catch up with you guys then.
Posted by pegasus on May 16, 2005, at 15:12:22
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday?, posted by All Done on May 16, 2005, at 11:00:25
Oh, dandy! I've been off babble since I posted my approval of the idea of a book club. Fortuntately, I already have In Session, and have recently reread it. Plus my schedule has been recently freed up, so I should be able to check in every couple of days. Yay! Yay! I was thinking of this while I was babble-less, and hoping I hadn't missed all the fun. I'm going to go review chapter 1 and see what I might have to say about it here. What a great book to pick for the first one.
pegasus
Posted by Dinah on May 16, 2005, at 19:29:08
In reply to Re: So should we wait till Monday?, posted by pegasus on May 16, 2005, at 15:12:22
I've included quotes for those who haven't gotten their books yet, but not page numbers because I think there's a paperback book out now, and the pages are probably different?
I had brought this book to therapy on the same day we were talking about Babble and about how I sometimes say things about him here that would do our relationship no good whatsoever. He told me that he was glad that I had somewhere to process what happened in therapy.
It fit in perfectly with the introduction to this book. In particular one of the paragraphs I highlighted (I'm reading the book with a highlighter this time, and might use post it notes as well.)
"Being one-on-one in the therapy room could lead to a dizzying loss of perspective, an inability to trust oneself. Bringing another person into the room, even after the fact, could clarify matters. In fact, talking about our therapy together proved to be one of the most therapeutic aspects of the whole process."
Her descriptions of the unofficial gatherings after the official writers' group remind me so much of Psychological Babble. It's one of the things I like best about this place. I don't lose perspective anywhere near as much with a group of friends to talk about what can be really confusing. I also find I bring things up in therapy because I've already normalized them here.
I also really liked the descriptions of transference, while she also kept in mind that not all reactions within the therapeutic relationship *are* transference.
"A single question - "How do I know if it's me or my therapist?" - was the source of much of our agonizing within my writers group."
I was reading the other day somewhere else that research shows that clients react better if therapists admit that discord in a relationship might be partially due to them, as well as transference or totally due to the client. I think that's one of my therapist's greater gifts.
I also really liked what she writes about boundaries.
"Some of the most moving poetry ever written was composed within rigid forms."
That is very much in keeping with my own thoughts on therapy. That it is the limitations of therapy that we sometimes rail against that actually provide what we need. Friendship is a lovely thing, but the boundaries of the therapeutic relationship allow for a relationship unlike any others in our lives. One just as valuable and precious as the ones with less obvious and artificial barriers. (Since it's hard to think of any relationship with no boundaries at all. Just less obvious ones.)
I guess I didn't like this paragraph, which most of you probably endorse and understand, but that I still reject with vehemence. But that may say more of me and my developmental stage. :)
"There is something inherently tragic about the client-therapist relationship. The therapist can never bring all of herself into the room, the client will long for what she can never get, the relationship is doomed to end. But treating the bond as either ordinary friendship or as a strictly professional exchange of goods and services only diminishes its therapeutic potential and hurts the client."
I like that my therapist just brings the best of himself into the room. I don't want anything more than therapy (forever therapy, but no other sort of relationship). And if I'm lucky enough to die first, there's no reason for the relationship to be doomed to end.
I've always thought the story of Anna O. (chapter one) was such a sad one. Dr. Breuer so clearly offered so much more than he was willing to deliver that that particular relationship looked more like a monumental tease than a cure. Hence today's boundaries, I guess.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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