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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by shadows721 on May 15, 2004, at 16:08:29
For the trauma work that I am involved in, I really need to have a safe place fully engaged within my mind to retreat when things get too scary. I don't know why, but this has been very difficult. I am really trying hard to work on this issue. Everytime I would think of something, it would have a infiltration of something scary from my abuse come into the scene. I would internally fight with myself to keep those scary things out of the scene.
Suddenly one night, I got an image of walking up to a english cottage like home. I thought I was dreaming, but I was awake. It had a warm glowing light inside it in the night. I was drawn to it. I saw beautiful flower like trees on the side of the building and a pond to the side with ducks. The door was open for me. The porch had soft pillows on the benches. I walked in and saw a mirror and looked at myself. I was in a beast like costume. The house was inviting. Cakes and cookies rested for me to eat. A place for reading books was to my side with a mural(sp?) of a fantasy place. There were stairs that went straight up the second floor, which was just a look out post. An infant baby was in a room and someone was assigned to watch her, but I didn't meet them. Gosh, I thought - Is this real or not real. Am I dreaming or not? Is this the safe place for the child parts of myself?
I also think seeing myself as a beast like creature in a costume is how the abuse has made me feel about myself, but the mirror had to show that to me.
Posted by DaisyM on May 15, 2004, at 18:13:20
In reply to Safe place therapy work struggle, posted by shadows721 on May 15, 2004, at 16:08:29
I'm glad you are working on creating a safe place for yourself. This is so, so important when you are doing trauma work. It wouldn't hurt to have an actual safe chair or corner in your house to go to either.
I use to teach childbirth classes and lead a relaxation to create a safe place. I don't know if this will work but I'll share. Think of me talking in a slow, soothing voice to you. Sentence by sentence by sentence.
Close your eyes and slow down your breathing. You are totally safe.
Imagine in your mind a box. Now imagine a door on this box. Make it a beautiful fancy door, with a lovely handle. Look closely at the handle, it has a lock and the key is in the lock. Take the key, unlock the door and put the key in your mental-pocket. Now open the door.
Inside the box is your safe place. It can be anywhere, or anyplace you want it to be. It can be your bed, a beach, your backyard, the moon...anywhere you feel safe, and warm and supported. Look all around your place. Make sure you imagine everything you'll need. Put flowers in your garden or a sunset over your beach. Do you feel safe, and warm, and supported? Listen quietly in your safe place. Is there music playing? Or a gentle breeze blowing? Or is it peaceful quiet? You should feel safe, and warm, and supported.
Ok, when you are ready, take a last, long look around. Walk over to your door, step out and close the door. Take the key out of your mental pocket and lock the door. Put the key back inthe pocket. You carry your safe place with you. It is there whenever you need it. You have the key, no one else does. No one can get into your safe place unless you bring them with you. Now open your eyes and know you've created something beautiful.
One last thing, it sometimes helps to let someone else know a little about your safe place so they can help you get there. If they can describe it, you can usually find your way back to it. It does take practice. Mine is inside my car, which has been sitting inthe sun, on a really cold day. So when I get in, I'm warm and safe. I can keep others out and escape down the road if I need to. The radio or tape player plays country music softly. :)
Posted by B2chica on May 15, 2004, at 19:18:35
In reply to Re: Safe place therapy work struggle, posted by DaisyM on May 15, 2004, at 18:13:20
wow, DaisyM.
i think you just helped me out big time. I was doing just what you said (imagining your soft slow calm voice) and i really like this. I like having a safe place all my own. with me always, no matter what, no matter who.
lately i have been getting images in my mind that i hate and can't seem to shake-it messes me up for a while. Now, maybe i can just run to my place and lock myself in and everything else out till i'm ready.
Thank you.
B2c.
Posted by shadows721 on May 16, 2004, at 3:31:30
In reply to Re: Safe place therapy work struggle, posted by DaisyM on May 15, 2004, at 18:13:20
This is the end of the thread.
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