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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by sadmom on October 25, 2003, at 18:53:25
Has anyone else had this happen? I've known my therapist for almost 4 years. For some reason I am not able to remember what she looks like in between appointments. I go to see her every 1 or 2 weeks. Why would I not remember what she looks like? I asked her and she didn't know either.
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 19:42:35
In reply to Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by sadmom on October 25, 2003, at 18:53:25
I remember what he feels like, if that makes sense, but not what he looks like. I guess what he feels like is more important to me.
Posted by Brio D Chimp on October 25, 2003, at 20:25:14
In reply to Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by sadmom on October 25, 2003, at 18:53:25
This is supposed to happen in people who have problems with object constancy which is usually achieved at 24-36 mos when the child learns to internalize the image of the mother and comfort herself with it when she leaves knowing the mother will return again. Before that stage supposedly the child is unable to comprehend that the mother still exists when she is not present. People with problems with abandonment fears(BPD etc) are supposed to have not negotiated this phase successfully. In Judith Rossner's novel "August" the patient snaps the analyst's photo before he leaves for vacation because she is afraid she will be unable to remember him. I think it's not an uncommon phenomenom.
That idea is based on Margaret Mahler's work if you're interested in looking it up. She was an analyst I think-not too many of them around these days but the idea kind of makes sense.
PS I can't get that novel to link to amazon.
> Has anyone else had this happen? I've known my therapist for almost 4 years. For some reason I am not able to remember what she looks like in between appointments. I go to see her every 1 or 2 weeks. Why would I not remember what she looks like? I asked her and she didn't know either.
Posted by Brio D Chimp on October 25, 2003, at 20:27:50
In reply to Re: Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by Brio D Chimp on October 25, 2003, at 20:25:14
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0395860067/drbobsvirte00-20
> This is supposed to happen in people who have problems with object constancy which is usually achieved at 24-36 mos when the child learns to internalize the image of the mother and comfort herself with it when she leaves knowing the mother will return again. Before that stage supposedly the child is unable to comprehend that the mother still exists when she is not present. People with problems with abandonment fears(BPD etc) are supposed to have not negotiated this phase successfully. In Judith Rossner's novel "August" the patient snaps the analyst's photo before he leaves for vacation because she is afraid she will be unable to remember him. I think it's not an uncommon phenomenom.
>
> That idea is based on Margaret Mahler's work if you're interested in looking it up. She was an analyst I think-not too many of them around these days but the idea kind of makes sense.
>
> PS I can't get that novel to link to amazon.
>
>
>
> > Has anyone else had this happen? I've known my therapist for almost 4 years. For some reason I am not able to remember what she looks like in between appointments. I go to see her every 1 or 2 weeks. Why would I not remember what she looks like? I asked her and she didn't know either.
>
>
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 20:52:24
In reply to Re: Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by Brio D Chimp on October 25, 2003, at 20:25:14
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 21:41:42
In reply to the right book link » Brio D Chimp, posted by Brio D Chimp on October 25, 2003, at 20:27:50
By the way, mind if I print out your post and bring it to my therapist to discuss it with him? He has seemed to think it was very odd of me. :)
Posted by fallsfall on October 25, 2003, at 23:57:28
In reply to Re: the right book link » Brio D Chimp, posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 21:41:42
I always wanted a picture of my first therapist. I thought that it would comfort me, since I had always looked at her for the whole session. But I couldn't find a picture. I could feel her comfort, but I wanted to see her.
My new therapist has his picture on the internet. I printed a copy out. But I'm in a different place now where I don't look at him, so seeing his picture doesn't really help. Sigh. Maybe later.
I find that I also can't describe people. What color hair? Do they wear glasses? One day I couldn't remember if my husband had a mustache. I hope I'm never a witness to a crime - I won't be any help at all.
I am Borderline. I wonder if needing the picture of my therapist and not being able to describe criminals are related?
Posted by galkeepinon on October 26, 2003, at 1:39:14
In reply to What do they look like?, posted by fallsfall on October 25, 2003, at 23:57:28
Interesting book:
"Mind Control: The Ultimate Terror"
(no link to Amazon)Interesting site:
http://www.clawww.lmu.edu/faculty/lswenson/Learning511/L14COGAP.html
> I always wanted a picture of my first therapist. I thought that it would comfort me, since I had always looked at her for the whole session. But I couldn't find a picture. I could feel her comfort, but I wanted to see her.
>
> My new therapist has his picture on the internet. I printed a copy out. But I'm in a different place now where I don't look at him, so seeing his picture doesn't really help. Sigh. Maybe later.
>
> I find that I also can't describe people. What color hair? Do they wear glasses? One day I couldn't remember if my husband had a mustache. I hope I'm never a witness to a crime - I won't be any help at all.
>
> I am Borderline. I wonder if needing the picture of my therapist and not being able to describe criminals are related?
Posted by galkeepinon on October 26, 2003, at 1:43:51
In reply to Re: What do they look like?, posted by galkeepinon on October 26, 2003, at 1:39:14
Interesting site:
Posted by judy1 on October 26, 2003, at 13:06:39
In reply to What do they look like?, posted by fallsfall on October 25, 2003, at 23:57:28
If it was just your therapist that you had difficulty remembering, then I would say it was probably linked to your diagnosis. But since it's so broad, I imagine it's the phenomenon that's being discussed here. Another fact, some of us are visual versus auditory learners, and there are disorders linked to that spectrum, e.g.- APD (auditory processing disorder- my son has this).
take care, judy
Posted by kitkat33 on October 27, 2003, at 13:17:51
In reply to Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by sadmom on October 25, 2003, at 18:53:25
It's really interesting that you posted that, I can never remember what mine is wearing. I leave and try to remember what color her clothes were or what they looked like. It's funny isn't it that we can't remember what they looked like or what they were wearing. Take Care, you're not alone in this.
Posted by karen_kay on October 27, 2003, at 14:45:27
In reply to Re: Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by kitkat33 on October 27, 2003, at 13:17:51
Odd, I have the oppossite effect! I always remember what mine look like and what they wear. I just can never remember what they say. Go figure. Must not be important. Karen
Posted by underthecs on October 27, 2003, at 19:48:49
In reply to Re: Can't remember what he says, posted by karen_kay on October 27, 2003, at 14:45:27
don't feel bad. not only can i not remember what he looks like or what he wears... lots of times i can't remember what he says either. LOL
Posted by karen_kay on October 28, 2003, at 8:31:18
In reply to Re: Can't remember what he says, posted by underthecs on October 27, 2003, at 19:48:49
Posted by Elle2021 on October 29, 2003, at 2:41:43
In reply to Can't remember what therapist looks like, posted by sadmom on October 25, 2003, at 18:53:25
I have the exact same experience. I have been seeing my shrink for a year and a half and can't remember his face until I see it again...weird, but true. Hehe!
Elle :)> Has anyone else had this happen? I've known my therapist for almost 4 years. For some reason I am not able to remember what she looks like in between appointments. I go to see her every 1 or 2 weeks. Why would I not remember what she looks like? I asked her and she didn't know either.
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