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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on February 2, 2005, at 1:44:25
Mind you, my husband has to keep putting open sympathy cards in front of me to get me to read them. I haven't written thank you notes yet, to my intense shame.
But I come to this board and am just struck hard in the gut by the level of loss and grief.
It brings up feelings in me that I think I'm not yet ready to feel.
Posted by gardenergirl on February 2, 2005, at 21:38:11
In reply to This board is overwhelming to me, posted by Dinah on February 2, 2005, at 1:44:25
Thanks for letting us know, Dinah. I have not experienced a recent loss, but due to some issues I have regarding my father's health, and some stuff that I am listening to with a client, I'm not sure this is a good place for me to visit at the moment, either.
Self-protection is a good thing. And your losses have been a real trauma to your system, I would think. It will take some time for you. Take as much as you need. No shame in doing what you need.
(((dinah)))
gg
Posted by alexandra_k on February 3, 2005, at 14:04:46
In reply to Re: This board is overwhelming to me » Dinah, posted by gardenergirl on February 2, 2005, at 21:38:11
((((Dinah))))
Posted by alexandra_k on February 3, 2005, at 14:05:54
In reply to This board is overwhelming to me, posted by Dinah on February 2, 2005, at 1:44:25
Sorry, above post was for Dinah.
((((gg))))
(in case you were feeling left out).
Posted by adagiolover1 on February 3, 2005, at 22:27:28
In reply to This board is overwhelming to me, posted by Dinah on February 2, 2005, at 1:44:25
If you are not ready to feel those things, trust your body, and your gut. At some point a blessed numbness comes, in between the times of sharpest grief.
3 yrs ago I had to quit posting to a similiar grief forum for the very same reasons..
and thank you notes.....well, I am sure that anyone who truly cares will miss a thank you note. At least at this point.
Just do as you can....that's all.
Posted by Shar on February 4, 2005, at 1:26:18
In reply to This board is overwhelming to me, posted by Dinah on February 2, 2005, at 1:44:25
Yes, Dinah, this is a hard one.
I hope you give yourself leeway to not come here if you don't feel up to it. If not, then please (at least) consider the idea.
Grief tends to be a rather long-term thing. When I lost the most precious beloved in my life someone told me...the first year is the hardest, because you have to go through life and life events without them. Like the first Thanksgiving without them, the first Christmas, Easter, Passover....whatever.
Plus, it takes a while to not see the beloved where they 'ought' to be. I saw mine (or expected her to be there) for many months; but she was not there.
I wish you much peace if you can find it. And, I'm very sorry for your loss.
And, I'd lose the intense shame over sympathy cards. There are many ways to deal with those types of cards, and none of them require your heart and soul. It is a kind custom, and I don't even know if people expect a reply. I wouldn't if I sent one. But, I could look it up in Miss Manner's Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior if you'd like.
xoxo
Shar
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