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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on June 19, 2006, at 2:16:43
He can pretty much make his own breakfast and lunch - at least the simpler ones. He doesn't use heat yet. He manages a lot of his clean laundry. He's supposed to comb his dog, but doesn't do so well with that. He structures his own homework. He carries his own dishes to the sink. I think he's overwhelmed with picking up his stuff. he does it ok with supervision and suggestions. He also has the job of putting empty garbage bags in the interior cans after my husband empties them.
So he does have a lot of responsibilities with regards to himself. But I was wondering if he should also start to take on family related responsibilities. Like maybe help with the cooking or with our special projects like painting.
I don't have a really good sense of what's appropriate because I had way too many household responsibilities, and my husband had far too few.
Posted by MidnightBlue on June 19, 2006, at 17:44:09
In reply to What sort of responsibilities goes with age 10, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2006, at 2:16:43
Dinah,
What does he LIKE to do? Also, how big? healthy? is he? I would imagine he could take out the trash, weed a flower bed as long as you identify the weeds, help grocery shop. Somebody needs to find all those items and haul them in and put them away. Can you give him a list and let him find half? Also a way to teach what is a good buy.
Wash dishes? Load the dishwasher? Especially if he is just helping. Yes he could help cook and even use a knife for easy chopping or slicing if you teach him how. These are all life skills. And I think he could use heat especially the microwave.
Help dad wash the car? Rake the yard?
Think about it this way. In 8 years he will be in college. What do you need to teach him between now and then?
Mom of a GROWN son!
MidnightBlue
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2006, at 0:38:38
In reply to Re: What sort of responsibilities goes with age 10 » Dinah, posted by MidnightBlue on June 19, 2006, at 17:44:09
He's typically healthy for a boy.
I think his only limitation is that he's a bit timid. He doesn't really like being out of sight in public.
I think you're right about the microwave. Helping with dinner is something he could definitely do. I've always tried to follow the Montessori ideal of letting him gain confidence in his competence by doing household chores. So, come to think of it, he also dusts when asked to. And he loves mopping with those newfangled squirting mops with teh disposable sheets.
I like the idea of having help alongside us as opposed to giving him chores. As I remember it, and as is still true come to think of it, working alone is boring and none too pleasant. But working with others can be fun.
Posted by Kath on June 29, 2006, at 18:15:10
In reply to Re: What sort of responsibilities goes with age 10 » MidnightBlue, posted by Dinah on June 20, 2006, at 0:38:38
Dinah, I wonder if you have any idea how fortunate your son is?????
You sound like a perfectly wonderful Mother. You're taking it seriously & care so much doing a good job.
You sound like a great Mom. I hope you give yourself credit about that!!!!!!
Hugs, Kath
> He's typically healthy for a boy.
>
> I think his only limitation is that he's a bit timid. He doesn't really like being out of sight in public.
>
> I think you're right about the microwave. Helping with dinner is something he could definitely do. I've always tried to follow the Montessori ideal of letting him gain confidence in his competence by doing household chores. So, come to think of it, he also dusts when asked to. And he loves mopping with those newfangled squirting mops with teh disposable sheets.
>
> I like the idea of having help alongside us as opposed to giving him chores. As I remember it, and as is still true come to think of it, working alone is boring and none too pleasant. But working with others can be fun.
Posted by Dinah on July 6, 2006, at 17:15:17
In reply to Re: What sort of responsibilities goes with age 10 » Dinah, posted by Kath on June 29, 2006, at 18:15:10
Thanks Kath. :) I try very very hard, but sometimes I think it's absolutely impossible not to feature prominently in a child's future therapy.
Posted by LynneDa on August 15, 2006, at 20:44:27
In reply to Re: What sort of responsibilities goes with age 10 » Kath, posted by Dinah on July 6, 2006, at 17:15:17
Dinah - Your last message(below) made me laugh so hard! I already assume I will have a starring role!!
I have a 10-year old girl with ADD and was searching for info when I came across your post. I have PMDD and take ADs and have lurked around these boards for a number of years.
Anyway . . . I write letters to my daughter periodically so that when she is in therapy as an older child or adult, maybe she will read them to her therapist and he/she can help her realize I really did try my best and I'm not the ogre she may remember & her behavior was not always tolerable either . . . LOL!
My 10-year old daughter has basic responsibilities like getting her breakfast, self-care, keeping her room clean, putting away her own laundry, but she also helps me when asked - helping me put away groceries, getting the mail each day, emptying the dishwasher, emptying the small trash cans into the big one, setting & clearing the table, taking most of the care of her bunny. I don't give her a weekly chore list per se and I agree it is fun when we can work on things together. I can't overload her with more than one thing at a time and she makes lots of lists due to her ADD.
Hope it is going well with your son. I am a horribly inconsistent disciplinarian and now that I am feeling better mentally, I am suddenly cracking down - which is really hard on both of us and hard for the rest of the family to watch. But I dread the teen years, so feel I have to get a handle on things now and giving her some responsibilities - and the corresponding respect when they are accomplished - is a good thing for her.
~ Lynne
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> Thanks Kath. :) I try very very hard, but sometimes I think it's absolutely impossible not to feature prominently in a child's future therapy.
>
>
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