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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 18:33:55
Yep, I give up. I need a vacation from parenting my 9 year old ADHD son. Today at his baseball game he threw a massive ritalin tantrum right in front of me and all the parents and his whole team.
I am so sick of the ritalin meds. The constant ups and downs. There is a very short window of time during the day when he is normal, and OK. The rest of the time - IT'S HELL. Either too much excitability or tantrums. I am so sick of the natural remedies, too, trying them and them not working. I am so sick of him being on the meds or not being on the meds. Sick of it all. I've also tried dexedrine and it made him a complete zombie. I've tried everything and I just give up. I think I will put myself on meds just to cope. Anything I can get my hands on.
Posted by Phillipa on July 19, 2006, at 21:47:05
In reply to I give up on ADHD, posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 18:33:55
How bout a vacation? Love Phillipa not making light of your problem
Posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 22:31:08
In reply to Re: I give up on ADHD » canadagirl, posted by Phillipa on July 19, 2006, at 21:47:05
><<not making light of your problem<<
I know you're not. I just came back from a family vacation. And it was too much stress and work. I'd love a vacation just for me but can't do it right now. Maybe prozac will send me on a mental vacation.
Posted by Phillipa on July 19, 2006, at 22:40:51
In reply to Re: I give up on ADHD » Phillipa, posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 22:31:08
zombie Love Phillipa or it could do what it did to me and hype you up and you could outdo you child
Posted by alohashirt on July 19, 2006, at 23:25:00
In reply to I give up on ADHD, posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 18:33:55
This sounds similar to the pain I cause my wife with my ADHD. When you say "rtitalin" do you mean vanilla ritalin (as opposed to different extended release meds?) When I tried ritalin it made my argumentative and mean. Focalin had the same effect.
Yet Concerta - which is the sam e active ingredient released over time was fine, because it avoids the crash as it wears off. Focalin XR was like Concerta without sleep interruptions and better symptom relief.I haven't had ups and downs in years. Buspar helped remove the overthinking that Focalin XR sometimes caused. Fish Oil seems to settle me down, and I was very skeptical. Exercise also helps.
Good luck, be assertive with your physician, skeptical of everything you hear (including this) and know that ADHD *does* have a positive side. Without my ADHD I would probably be easier to work with and be married to, I would have finished my PhD, my house would be in better shape but I suspect I'd be less insanely curious, which has helped me succeed at work and I imagine I would be earning about 1/3 what I am earning. I have a good friend who works at a small hedge fund, very smart, still very disorganized and unreliable, and he mentioned that if a genetic cure foir ADHD were discovered he wouldn't go near it.
"Why?" I asked
"Look, we have succeed despite or because of our ADHD by building work habits that complement it. Without ADHD we'd be "normal without the work habits of a normal person" and would probably be much less succesful. Career isn't everything, and I really wish I chose some less "interesting" choices but i think I agree with him, even though I curse my ADHD most days.Good luck!
Feel free to babble me if you want any input from a molstly functional adult ADHD person with two beautiful children, at leats one of whom appear sto also have ADHD.
> Yep, I give up. I need a vacation from parenting my 9 year old ADHD son. Today at his baseball game he threw a massive ritalin tantrum right in front of me and all the parents and his whole team.
>
> I am so sick of the ritalin meds. The constant ups and downs. There is a very short window of time during the day when he is normal, and OK. The rest of the time - IT'S HELL. Either too much excitability or tantrums. I am so sick of the natural remedies, too, trying them and them not working. I am so sick of him being on the meds or not being on the meds. Sick of it all. I've also tried dexedrine and it made him a complete zombie. I've tried everything and I just give up. I think I will put myself on meds just to cope. Anything I can get my hands on.
Posted by Susana M on July 20, 2006, at 7:22:43
In reply to I give up on ADHD, posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 18:33:55
I have like you, a 9 year old boy with ADHD and I got help as soon as the kindergarten teacher told me that he might have to repeat the year b/c he was'nt learning anything ( not even the ABC's) and he became very depressed b/c he didn't have any friends ( he was too much for other kids to handle)..so I found help with Concerta ( he also has ritalin since after 7 hrs. the concerta wears out and I could'nt get him to concentrate on his homework...a huge battle and screams every night! Now I only use this little pill for homework or if I have visitors,parties ,etc..
In regards to how my son is doing @ school he is doing excellent! He is so sharp especially with math/science,etc he reads like a pro and the teacher believes he might be gifted b/c of the fact that he is so fast in knowing the all answers, and he is now a happy boy with lots of friends, I believe like the last mesage you received that ADHD gives you some disadvantages in life but also you might find some huge advantages...I tried my son with T-ball long time ago and it did'nt work, he is not that much into sports,same happened with boy scouts so I now let it be! He is now on piano classes and again we are amazed how good he is at it. So try and find activities that work for him, don't feel that he HAS to do sports...let him ride his bike, etc, but don't feel like the mayority of parents here in the US that if you don't have your child in a 100 extra activities you are a bad mother! He also loves swimming so I might in the future let him compete...BTW I did notice that when he first started Concerta or when his doseges where increased he became a Zombie..I kept him on his meds. and after a while it disapeared, so don't be so scared if he turns into a Zombie( without saying not to be on the lookout)..give the drug time to act, and his body to adapt Hope this help...Susana M
Posted by pseudoname on July 20, 2006, at 13:45:59
In reply to I give up on ADHD, posted by canadagirl on July 19, 2006, at 18:33:55
Posted by canadagirl on July 20, 2006, at 20:58:51
In reply to Re: I give up on ADHD, posted by Susana M on July 20, 2006, at 7:22:43
Thank you everyone. I have some hope when I read your posts. I think that he likes the IDEA of being on teams, etc. but just can't handle it.
I feel bad for him, hurt, upset, disappointed that he can't have a normal social life like other kids. I did try Concerta at two different ages and then about a month ago; had some good results until he started reacting to it again with the screaming and crying outbursts as it wore off. This seems to be the pattern. Does anyone have any ideas of what to use to stop this??? His pediatrician is supportive...but he just does not know why nothing works well and we keep changing meds every year or two.
These outbursts last about an hour or 1 - 1 1/2 hours but they make my life hell day in and day out. The regular ritalin seems to do it too. Ritalin SR to some extent as well. I use that mostly, but the regular ritalin is what caused the outburst the other day. All the parents were staring at me like I was the world's worst mother, as he was elbowing me and telling me off and crying and screaming. I just grabbed him and got him to the car.
I have ADHD too and struggled my whole life being undiagnosed but like one of the posters said they did, I over compensated for it and became relatively "successful" at work. But educationally, lots of half finished degrees, half finished professional designations, never finished anything except one minor type of designation educationally. I feel like a failure. Couldn't sit for hours in lecture halls or in classrooms. Terrible. I don't want him to go through this hell. And as I said, for myself, I am so desperate, I am ready to find anyone who would give me any type of meds so I can cope with this. I don't care what I take.
Posted by alohashirt on July 20, 2006, at 22:03:37
In reply to Re: I give up on ADHD, posted by canadagirl on July 20, 2006, at 20:58:51
I would suggest getting a second opinion from a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD. The world of ADHD pharmaceuticals is very different today than even three years ago and a "regular" pediatrician is unlikely to have as broad an array of patients to appreciate the full range of choices. It sounds as if you've stuck with your pediatrican for long enough and sopme specialist assistance is called for.
If you are in the North East US I can recommend a couple of people, otherwise I'd suggest asking around at your local Chadd support group for names.
> Thank you everyone. I have some hope when I read your posts. I think that he likes the IDEA of being on teams, etc. but just can't handle it.
>
> I feel bad for him, hurt, upset, disappointed that he can't have a normal social life like other kids. I did try Concerta at two different ages and then about a month ago; had some good results until he started reacting to it again with the screaming and crying outbursts as it wore off. This seems to be the pattern. Does anyone have any ideas of what to use to stop this??? His pediatrician is supportive...but he just does not know why nothing works well and we keep changing meds every year or two.
>
> These outbursts last about an hour or 1 - 1 1/2 hours but they make my life hell day in and day out. The regular ritalin seems to do it too. Ritalin SR to some extent as well. I use that mostly, but the regular ritalin is what caused the outburst the other day. All the parents were staring at me like I was the world's worst mother, as he was elbowing me and telling me off and crying and screaming. I just grabbed him and got him to the car.
>
> I have ADHD too and struggled my whole life being undiagnosed but like one of the posters said they did, I over compensated for it and became relatively "successful" at work. But educationally, lots of half finished degrees, half finished professional designations, never finished anything except one minor type of designation educationally. I feel like a failure. Couldn't sit for hours in lecture halls or in classrooms. Terrible. I don't want him to go through this hell. And as I said, for myself, I am so desperate, I am ready to find anyone who would give me any type of meds so I can cope with this. I don't care what I take.
>
Posted by canadagirl on July 21, 2006, at 7:20:37
In reply to Get a second opinion (Re: I give up on ADHD » canadagirl, posted by alohashirt on July 20, 2006, at 22:03:37
Thanks for your ideas. Actually I did go to the best children's hospital last summer to see the psychiatrists there (actually a whole team of specialists) and had another complete assessment and they REDUCED his medication but said keep him on the same stuff (ritalin SR 20 plus 10 regular) I was giving him 2 ritalin SR 20. Also, his pediatrician is a specialist behavioural pediatrician and all he treats are ADHD, Autistic and kids who have some type of behaviour problems. So I think we have good MDs, but it's just the &^*%&^* stuff doesn't work well enough.
Maybe I need a third opinion.
Posted by lymom3 on July 23, 2006, at 5:00:21
In reply to Re: Get a second opinion (Re: I give up on ADHD » alohashirt, posted by canadagirl on July 21, 2006, at 7:20:37
Have you tried anything except Ritalin? Have you thought about the Daytrana patch? Focalin XR is what worked for my son after years of the behaviors that you describe. it is so hard to know that your child has no friends or the ones that he does have are as hyper or "different" in their own way. My son always just longed to be normal like the rest of them. The patch might be something to try as the dosage is more even and you don't get the crashes like you do on the pills. I am trying it myself as an adult and find it much more even. It does take a lot of trial and error to get meds right. Hang in there, it does get better .
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