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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
This board seems to be a beacon for those in need of support and encouragement. I find myself reading the posts here and wanting to extend my empathy and become a part of this caring network. Depression is such a distorting disease. We need to be reminded by others that what we feel is not who we are. Our brains our not our souls. (It took me a while before I got over that particular stigma)
So, I hope that a few of you fine souls can share some wisdom with me. I am in my mid-thirties, and after important years of being home with my kids, I feel another pull at my heart. Maybe its because of the depression and how it makes you so aware of suffering, but I feel that we do not go through things for nothing. This human experience has given me understanding. I thought that I could become a Nurse and give back mercy to others. The problem is that I am also aware that I have limitations. This is a very stressul job and I wonder if I have what it takes to walk away and not let what I do consume me, or cause a relapse in my depression.
Being a mother is my primary role in life. But I took on this role very young, before I had developed myself. What you leave undone you are destined to revisit. I don't want to ignore what feels like a calling. I just want to be realistic in what I'm emotionally capable of taking on. I'm just starting college. Any advise? Lynn
Posted by Todd on June 15, 2000, at 20:28:06
In reply to Following your calling...., posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
Follow it, Lynn. It tugs on your heart for a reason. Jump, and the net will appear. Godspeed!
Todd
Posted by Cam W. on June 15, 2000, at 20:56:05
In reply to Following your calling...., posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
Lynn - Schooling and/or educating yourself is never a waste of time. Even if you do not use the learning you will have been taught how to think in an organized manner, which extends to all aspects of life. Besides, becoming a nurse is easy (OW! - my wife, the public health nurse, is sitting beside me). GO FOR IT! - Cam (& Patti BN RN).
Posted by Greg on June 15, 2000, at 22:06:07
In reply to Following your calling...., posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
Lynn,
Being someone who returned to college at the age of 37 I have one piece of "advice" (taken with a grain of salt, of course), train to do something that will make you happy. I had so many options to choose from when I went back, but I wanted to be able to be creative, so I chose Architectural Drafting. I've designed homes (my own), renovations, remodels, etc. There has never been a day that I've regretted my choice. I could have followed a path that made me more money, but I learned a long time ago that money doesn't make me happy (well, not completely..). Whatever you choose to do, make sure it brings some joy to your life, you deserve it.
Make sure that you put the effort into to being as good to yourself as I'm sure you have been to your family.
Best wishes to you and yours,
Greg
> This board seems to be a beacon for those in need of support and encouragement. I find myself reading the posts here and wanting to extend my empathy and become a part of this caring network. Depression is such a distorting disease. We need to be reminded by others that what we feel is not who we are. Our brains our not our souls. (It took me a while before I got over that particular stigma)
>
> So, I hope that a few of you fine souls can share some wisdom with me. I am in my mid-thirties, and after important years of being home with my kids, I feel another pull at my heart. Maybe its because of the depression and how it makes you so aware of suffering, but I feel that we do not go through things for nothing. This human experience has given me understanding. I thought that I could become a Nurse and give back mercy to others. The problem is that I am also aware that I have limitations. This is a very stressul job and I wonder if I have what it takes to walk away and not let what I do consume me, or cause a relapse in my depression.
> Being a mother is my primary role in life. But I took on this role very young, before I had developed myself. What you leave undone you are destined to revisit. I don't want to ignore what feels like a calling. I just want to be realistic in what I'm emotionally capable of taking on. I'm just starting college. Any advise? Lynn
Posted by Janice on June 15, 2000, at 23:51:20
In reply to Re: Following your calling.... » Lynn B, posted by Greg on June 15, 2000, at 22:06:07
Greg, great story. Well I guess it's a real life story. That sounds neat, really neat, designing your own house. Plus, loving what you're doing. Now that's a success story!
Thanks for sharing that with us, Janice
Posted by Jennifer on June 16, 2000, at 2:33:19
In reply to Following your calling...., posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
Lynn, Nursing is wonderful, caring and stressful.
But if it is what you want to do, you need to reach for that goal. Nursing school in itself requires determination and focus, but as you have a wonderful career at the end, you will find the strength to meet the challenge. There are many excellent nurses out there with difficulties of their own. You make a choice whether it hinders or helps both you, and your patients. I choose to let it help us both. There is no more special time then when you help someone else in their time of need. This web site is proof of that. Look at all the strangers that have come together to help each other out. It's obvious that many use their experience and education (self or professional) to help others, without regard to whether their own needs will be met. Nursing is the same.
In addition, there are many types of nursing available, all requiring different tolerances and abilities. In fourteen years I have gone from Pediatrics to Neonatal Intensive Care to Pediatric Home Care - then the other RN's wanted me to do the "young" cancer patient's too (ie: those with children) because I was more oriented to the needs of young families. After that was Hospital Mgmt, Outpatient Surgery Center Director, then development of a Pediatric Mildly Ill Center. I worked there for almost no pay because I felt so needed by these families who often could not afford medical care. It wanted to make you cry when you could see how giving them just a little information could change so much of their life.
I am blessed to not HAVE to work now. I spend my time educating my children and I do all my nursing for free. Nothing can replace helping at an office where the staff really need your experience, or getting a call from a child care center in town that someone is hurt, and providing urgent care, or going on the ambulance with them to the hospital. I've held children in the ER for hours waiting for their parents to come from work. In one way it's sad, but in another, I know they would be there alone without me. It's great to go to the bank or store and someone says "Thanks" I heard what you did yesterday. Others just call me their "gaurdian angel". To me, that's making an impact on people's lives in a way that I could not do otherwise. Seek out the nursing, it's the BEST. Jennifer RN-C> This board seems to be a beacon for those in need of support and encouragement. I find myself reading the posts here and wanting to extend my empathy and become a part of this caring network. Depression is such a distorting disease. We need to be reminded by others that what we feel is not who we are. Our brains our not our souls. (It took me a while before I got over that particular stigma)
>
> So, I hope that a few of you fine souls can share some wisdom with me. I am in my mid-thirties, and after important years of being home with my kids, I feel another pull at my heart. Maybe its because of the depression and how it makes you so aware of suffering, but I feel that we do not go through things for nothing. This human experience has given me understanding. I thought that I could become a Nurse and give back mercy to others. The problem is that I am also aware that I have limitations. This is a very stressul job and I wonder if I have what it takes to walk away and not let what I do consume me, or cause a relapse in my depression.
> Being a mother is my primary role in life. But I took on this role very young, before I had developed myself. What you leave undone you are destined to revisit. I don't want to ignore what feels like a calling. I just want to be realistic in what I'm emotionally capable of taking on. I'm just starting college. Any advise? Lynn
Posted by AndrewB on June 16, 2000, at 5:49:23
In reply to Following your calling...., posted by Lynn B on June 15, 2000, at 17:11:38
Mahatma Ghandi I am not,
But I say save giving for the weekends and for your family unless that you are doing what you really enjoy doing. There are givers and takers in this world. In my book it is best to be somewhere in between. Sometimes truly sacrificing givers are, deep down inside, trying to curry favor with the world to compensate for what they feel is their unwelcome presence amoungst us. Don't give for the wrong reasons. Love, not fear, should guide you.
Posted by Lynn B on June 16, 2000, at 12:29:19
In reply to Re: Following your calling...., posted by AndrewB on June 16, 2000, at 5:49:23
> Mahatma Ghandi I am not,
>
> But I say save giving for the weekends and for your family unless that you are doing what you really enjoy doing. There are givers and takers in this world. In my book it is best to be somewhere in between. Sometimes truly sacrificing givers are, deep down inside, trying to curry favor with the world to compensate for what they feel is their unwelcome presence amoungst us. Don't give for the wrong reasons. Love, not fear, should guide you.Wow, thanks for all your perspectives. Each of you gave me something to think about. Nursing is something that I have had in the back of my mind for the past few years. Some things have happened this year that have compelled me to action. Turning 37 and having your youngest child finish kindegarten thrusts you into having to face what else you are besides a mother. About the same time my Mom had emergency quad-by-pass surgery(which was the third person in my immediate family to do so in 4 years). I flew down to Florida to be with her. She was having a great deal of anxiety and this was something I was able to help particularly with. I was sitting on one side of her and a Heart Psychologist who was called in was on the other. She said she wanted to live a few more years because she had always wanted to do something really meaningful in her life. We tried to reassure her that raising four children to become good people was incredibly meaningful to this world. But inside I knew exactly what she meant. She had dropped out of Nursing School when she got married. She would always wonder what else she might have been.
History does repeat itself. I have four children(two from a previous marriage that are older) and I didn't want to always wonder. I found that caring for her while she recovered was very rewarding. I could do this and I have a passion about medicine and how the body works. Not only that but it would be a continuation of what my mother never finished. This was my plan, as soon as my depression was under control again---which is proving harder to acheive this time.
Something else happened before I started school this summer. Having a bout of bronchitis I went to the urgent-care clinic in the next town. While waiting to be seen I heard a young woman wailing in the next room. I knew immediately that this was a mother grieving for her child. The attendant confirmed this, and said somthing about some days being not so pleasant here. I was crying so hard I was embarrassed. Here was this woman in the next room experiencing my worst nightmare and everyone was going about their business. I sat there for almost two hours listening to her and feeling this unbelievable emotional outpouring. This scared me, I guess. How can one be a professional and be that emotionally prone?
So, I talked myself out of entering the Nursing Program. Telling myself I didn't have the right personality profile for the job. I'm currently taking horticulture classes which I find very therapeutic, but not particularly challenging or rewarding. I did floral design for a few years part time and found hapiness in creating. It just isn't as noble. Like Andrew said, maybe my motivation is to prove myself rather than be at peace with myself. Doing what you love is my advice to my children. I will pray on this. Thanks, I hope I can be as helpful to all of you.
Lynn
Posted by Carrie on June 19, 2000, at 17:50:39
In reply to Insightful responses., posted by Lynn B on June 16, 2000, at 12:29:19
Lynn I just wanted to add a suggestion for you. This may be too much with young children and college but I was thinking that maybe if you were to take a part time position as a nursing assistant somewhere you would really be able to get an idea if nursing is right for you and about how you will feel in a nursing position. They're are all kinds of jobs in that field and I think for some they can be uplifting and for others very depressing. I have worked as a nurses aid and as an attendant to the mentally retarded. My nursing aid experience was in a nursing home and I found it rewarding although it was hard for me when people I had grown to like died. My experience in the home for the mentally retarded was very emotionally draining and wasn't good for me. I did at one time think I wanted to be a nurse these experiences showed me that nursing was not for me. On the other hand I met several woman who took these jobs, just for jobs with no desire to go into nursing and realized that nursing is exactly what they were meant to do. Anyway I wish you luck.
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