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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by kittycat on April 16, 2004, at 5:20:28
In reply to Re: married » sexylexy, posted by Magdalena on April 13, 2004, at 14:37:44
You sound exactly like me. We haven't met before. I've been coming here for a while now but have never had the courage to write before. Your story is so similar to mine that I had to respond. My fiance of 5 years cheated on me with a friend (ex) of mine which led to my depression escalating and eventually a suicide attempt which landed me in hospital. My current boyfriend of nearly a year had to call the paramedics and basically saved my life. I feel so guilty that he is having to deal with the after effects from my previous relationship. I also worry that he will leave me one day. I find it difficult to give in completely because I am so scared of being hurt again.
> Hey Lexy, that is so me, i have only been with my boyfriend for almost 8 months but so many times i felt this way because i don't want him to have to deal with all this, my anxiety/depression the fact that i have to take meds/therapy....i just feel like he deserves someone who is normal and can go out anywhere and be up for anything without these invountary fears and sadness. He tells me support is what hes here for, he wants to be with me and says he has never been happier before, and reasures me that he wants to stick by me and help me get better...he's so sweet but sometimes it sits in the back of my mind, that one day he's just gonna get fed up and leave...just insecurities i know but i've always been a little apprehensive about relationships, it could be because i come from a broken home or it could be because my ex boyfriend of 5 years was unfaithful to me and broke my heart and possibly my faith. I try to see it this way, that the faith part is up to me, that its in my hands, i choose to have faith and be positive despite the negatives that i have had to deal with, i tell myself that everybody goes to some degrees of hurt and thats what makes us human. I just need to learn to accept and not overanalyze situations that most likely will never occur and so it’s pointless to get all upset over them. Easier said than done but i think i am slowly getting better with this...
>
> Im happy to hear that you are almost done school! Home in 9 days eh? such a wonderful feeling it must be, you deserve it!
>
> Have a great day, sorry for the babble, just could relate to what you said.
> ;)
>
> Mag
Posted by Magdalena on April 16, 2004, at 11:41:59
In reply to Re: married » Magdalena, posted by kittycat on April 16, 2004, at 5:20:28
hey kittykat, i know how difficult it is and its been 4 years since i left that relationship and only now am i starting to really deal with the after effects. I really want a normal relationship where there is no insecurities and complete trust but then i wonder does anyone really have that? what defines normal? I think the fact that we are trying this again, shows that maybe we arent as 'relationship deviant' as we think, and somehow this could be the very thing that can help us heal.
I'm glad you posted and yes it does sound like we are in the very same boat, what i have realized is that its normal to have insecurities but not to dwell on them because that can have its own devestating effects...easier said than done i know but i am working on it;)Are u also on Lexapro? i am on paxil and its only been a little over a month, still sleepy and tired as hell, hopeing to get over that though.
Thanks for sharing with us, i hope you get the courage to post again, everyone here is so wonderful and helpful.:)
you are not alone.}
Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on April 16, 2004, at 11:48:44
In reply to RE:: mag, posted by mystic on April 15, 2004, at 22:54:48
hey mystic, i've been alright actually just been working and sleeping..lol..i wonder if i am ever going to need less sleep again!? so weird. i have a few birthdays this weekend and i hope that i will be feeling good to go cause these are old freinds of mine and i really do care about them. It sucks when going out to have fun can start the anxiety mode...lol damn.
well i hope you've been having some better days, i know you have been getting headaches, trust me so have i, but now they are starting to lessen a bit, yesterday i only got one late at night and i think sleep took care of it, i was worried there for a bit cause i was popping advil like candy.hope everyone has a good weekend!
p.s Simus is the weather starting to get better where you are? it is here, i have finally seen the sun in what felt like FOREVER! this sunday it said it will be a high of 15c !! yeay summer is on its way!:)
Mag
Posted by simus on April 16, 2004, at 12:06:26
In reply to RE:: mag » mystic, posted by Magdalena on April 16, 2004, at 11:48:44
> p.s Simus is the weather starting to get better where you are?
YES!!! It's beautiful! 65ish and sunny - heavenly!
Posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 12:06:36
In reply to Re: freaking about weight » sexylexy, posted by trucker on April 15, 2004, at 23:01:05
Trucker,
Have you ever tried water areobics or water walking. Your body is virtualy weighless and the water resistance gives you 8 times the impact. If you are embaressed to wear a swim suit, the woman I have seen do it many times wear shorts ect...just and idea to help your joints!!
Lexy
Posted by simus on April 16, 2004, at 12:16:53
In reply to Re: freaking about weight, posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 12:06:36
> Have you ever tried water areobics or water walking. Your body is virtualy weighless and the water resistance gives you 8 times the impact.
Great idea for me too right now! Thanks. But that stinking pride hasn't even let me buy a swimsuit in over 5 years. My body image was always soooo important when I was slender, and I was absolutely terrified of being fat. Strange how humbling life can be... =}
Posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 13:30:30
In reply to Re: freaking about weight » sexylexy, posted by simus on April 16, 2004, at 12:16:53
To my complete amazement, I actually bought new clothes that *fit* last week. (It was really hard to look in the mirror when I was changing without ralphing.) I have been wearing baggy everythings for a long time. Pants are always the first thing to stop fitting. Now I have clothes that, for the moment, fit me. I just hope I don't outgrow these too.
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 15:36:26
In reply to Redirected Lexaproers, posted by jlynne on March 13, 2004, at 1:31:16
Hey lexy what about me???>.hahhahahah Hope you are having a great day...Had a drs appt today and told her about my and everyones problems with that time of the month and she suggested that the increase to 15mg would be just for that week and then go back to the 10..but not sure about there just thought i would throw it out there for an FYI...Hope everyone is doing great....luvya all...Mystic
Posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 15:42:32
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy, posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 15:36:26
hey mystic...was jsut checking the board for the first time in a few days and saw your post. im not a doc but that sounds weird to me, to increase for one week a month. won't it confuse your body? can you take a benzo if you feel extra anxious that week. i mean lex is a maintenance med so the point is that it builds up in your bloodstream...increasing for one week then going back down seems weird to me??? EM
Posted by Magdalena on April 16, 2004, at 15:51:33
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » mystic, posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 15:42:32
yeah that does sound a bit weird, also i was reading that there is this thing called drug holidays were you stop taking them on the weekend to counter react sexual side effects, doesnt this sound weird to anyone else also?
Mag
Posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 15:54:08
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » mystic, posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 15:42:32
Hi EM,
Like you, I'm uncomfortable with the idea of increasing my dose for 1 week per month. If possible I'd like to find a different solution. I have an appt with my pdoc next week and will see what he suggests.
It's so strange that Lex just stops working as soon as my period hits, not to mention frustrating.
I hope everything is going well with you.
K.
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:23:40
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » mystic, posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 15:42:32
You know EM I thought that same thing and I was thinking that everyone most everyone has a problem increasing to 15 or 20 wouldnt that happen every month..I love my doc but sometimes I just dont know...I think that she thinks that might work but not really educated as to whether or not it would...But I know that xanax is an option but with all the headaches I have been having lately I worry because xanax typically gives me a headache...But hopefully this will be my 3rd period on the lex and hopefully it will be better...How are you feeling???>>You sound really good and that my friend I'm glad to hear....You take care and hope to talk to you soon..thanks so much for the feedback..!!!>..as always >>.Mystic
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:29:21
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » want info, posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 15:54:08
Hey K...how are you doing??>.what dosage are you on now??..I have heard of the weekend holiday thing also and right now I'm trying to get past the sexual s/e and trying to actually figure out if it is a s/e or from the life long struggle with my childhood molestation and we tend to blame everything on the lexapro...But my problem is after my period the week between not having one and until I ovulate..My sister is the same way and I think that someone else mentioned this on the board so it is pretty weird..But like I said I will see what happens at that time of the month after being on lex for 3 periods..But if you would ask your dr what he thinks about that idea but not into it anyway I just think that the s/e are bad enough w/out having to go through them once a month what would be the point..but I see a primary care not a dr that just prescribes meds...Thanks again for posting your opinion that is what I love about these posts is everyone contributes and that is great help..Take care of yourself K and talk to you soon....Your friend Mystic
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:35:28
In reply to RE: Hey K, posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:29:21
Hey everyone..Happy Weekend..I hope that everyone is well...Bridetobe you should be working on those invitations...Anakin how are you doing did you get yours mailed out??...Mrs C...Hope you are doing good@!@@>>..Ali my friend Hope your weekend is uneventful and restfull...Trucker hope you are doing well today!!!!....Mag hope that paxil is working for you...EM Keep up the good work you are doing great!!!!...Lexy you know what I have to say!!!!....6 more days less than 6 more days hahahaha....Simus it is good to hear from you and hope that you are doing good today and have a great weekend...Jlynne maybe will catch you on open post later on tonight..Lynne hope that you are doing well and have been working on that treadmill it really helps and the whether is getting nicer out so you can get out into the sunshine!!!!..Havent heard from texaschix at all hope that she reads and is doing ok...Well I'm going to go and have a glass of wine for the weekend and relax...Everyone take care and talk to you all soon!!!!>>>>A friend Mystic
Posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 16:36:18
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » want info, posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 15:54:08
i agree i am coming up on my period too (this happened last time!) and i get that spaciness coming back. mystic i really would get a second opinion about changing the dose for one week a month. my pdoc as i said just said take small amounts of xanax as needed (maybe a .5 a day) to get through this time...hope you guys are well...em
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:39:22
In reply to k mystic...and all, posted by want info on April 16, 2004, at 16:36:18
Hey EM is your problem before during or after with your period..and how long does it last..you must be on your 3rd just like me we started at the exact same time...mystic
Posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 16:49:22
In reply to RE: Hey K, posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 16:29:21
Hi Mystic,
You have problems with Lex after your period? My problems hit around the week before and continue until my period is over. I've been on Lex through 4 periods now and I can tell you I'm not looking forward to the 5th.
These days I'm at 20 mgs of Lexapro and 150 mgs of Wellbutrin. The combo is working out pretty well, but I still feel very tired much of the time. When I took Prozac I found that it had a very energizing effect and I find myself wishing for that.
As for the sexual s/e's, Wellbutrin is supposed to help with that. You could try taking some and see if you're still experiencing problems...that might help you to determine if your sexual probs stem from lex or past experiences. (A good therapist can help with that too.)
I went to see my therapist today (I see one for meds and one for general therapy.) He's very new age and is a huge advocate of yoga, herbal supplements and meditation. One of these days soon he's going to teach me some deep breathing exercises that take almost 2 hours to complete.
I'm not sure how I feel about seeing a therapist who is so new age. But some of his techniques have been very beneficial and he's a really nice guy. Would you be comfortable seeing a therpaist who was into alternative treatments?
I like this therapist much better than my last one. My last therapist didn't like the idea of me being on meds and thought I should be able to conquer my anxiety through mental relaxation. Anyone who thinks that has NEVER had a panic attack.
Eeeek, I'm babbling. I appologize. But sometimes it's always nice to get your thoughts written down. Thanks for listening.
K.
Posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 17:14:46
In reply to RE: Hey K » mystic, posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 16:49:22
No no no K..thanks for sharing I love love love listening and you can be soo interesting...I am into all the alternative things I am not into taking the herbs and stuff like that...but I do take yoga classes at the gym and I would love to be able to settle down long enough to meditate..I think that with everything you have to just do it and you have to make time to do it and that is what I need to do because I think all those things are very good.>I do arobics 3 times a week lift weights 3 times a week and yoga once a week and that works for me but not enough I still at this point in my life need the meds..now that I have finally decided to take them I have the med phobia...
As far as seeing a therapist that is into all that stuff well whatever works for people I have been lucky enough to have just recently found an amazing therapists that I hope I'm not let down but has been just wonderful and have only had 3 visits but have come away from 2 of them with a sense that I'm getting somewhere and this person is really really listening to me...I realize the molestation that I was at the hands of in my childhood was absolutely horific and my mother was just as horific but she may have been sick and couldnt help herself I dont know..But that is something that this woman said to me yesterday she is not there to judge my mother because there is always a sense of guilt when you talk about "your mother"..and she told me not to go there that she is there to help me and figure out what I got from being in an abusive home and I thought wow that is great she finally gets it..I cant go back and change what happened to me>>>i did an awsome job with raising my daughter she is great human being and I have broken that cycle but for me I'm still broken and need to be fixed for once in my life and that is what I hope that she does for me...So to think that people that are against meds well you know they should be there for you not for their own beliefs and you were soooo right "they have never had a panic attack haha..I know I know I'm am friggin rambling on and on..but I just really believe that you need to go to someone that is going to help you and not waste your precious time on things that wont...'LIFE IS TO SHORT TO WEAR TIGHT SHOES"...
Well K now I'm the one sorry for going on and on...But just wanted to get it out...thanks for sharing your views and I hope that you are getting the help that you need....
I was also telling the therapist that I think that the people that deal with panic/anxiety/depression are the most compasionate people you would want to know she wasnt so sure of some of her patients but the people on the posts here I know that to be true...They can be feeling at their lowest, share it with us and then it is always so how are you doing..they are into trying to help others we care about so many people and we try to help because we dont want people to feel the same pain we do....God bless you K and god bless everyone on here I have found angels in a place that I wasnt even looking and I am forever grateful..So i have probably said way too much but that is the way I am...Take care and talk to you soon...Mystic
Posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 18:41:24
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy, posted by mystic on April 16, 2004, at 15:36:26
Hey Mystic and all
I have had a really nice day. Finished up my research project and all I have to do now is present it to the community next week. I am so excited to be going home. Only 6 days until my Daddy comes and takes me from this place! I am pampering myself this weekend. I just had an hour massage and am feeling pretty damn good. I went to the health food store and got some green beans and a nice piece of salmon. Yum! I also went running in the park then to the gym, really working on the whole weight thing. Tomorrow, I am getting a manicure and pedicure. Celebrating my last week of graduate school. Go me!
Mystic, I had no idea of your abuse. Have you struggled with depression/anxiety before or is this a first time for you. If it is a first you are very lucky! I have done a lot of research on the negitive effects of survivors of child abuse. It is so important that you have a great therapist. I of course am a big fan of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. This believe that your thoughts influence your behavior which influence your emotions. You learn to recognize these thoughts, challange them ayd finally get rid of them. This allows you to feel so much better. I use it with all my clients and it works really well.
K about a alternitive therapist, only you can know whats right for you but if things do not seem to be getting better or getting to the root of why your are depressed or anxious, it is more unlikely that you will be able to see long term results. I tried all the breathing stuff before I started Lex and it could not calm me down! Of course everyone is different and whatever makes you feel better is awesome!
Good luck all...God Bless
Lexy
PS I am a big loser tonight, is anyone going to be around ?
Posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 18:53:57
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy, posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 18:41:24
Lexy,
You sound like you're doing SO well. That's wonderful! I love getting a massage...in some ways it's almost better than sex. :) Are you all packed and ready to go?
I hope your family and friends are throwing you a party when you get home. You deserve one, not just for finishing graduate school, but for also being a strong person. Congratulations!
K.
Posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 19:01:50
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy » sexylexy, posted by KathrynLex on April 16, 2004, at 18:53:57
K~
Thanks for the kind words! About massages, the first thing I always think when they begin is "I can't believe this ever has to end". I am doing really well. I stopped taking any vitamins and for some odd reason that seems to help a lot. I am so strange...I swear if you put me under a human sized super microscope you would see a bunch of crazy things!
I am getting packed, its taking so much, my apartment is 42 stairs up so carrying all the stuff sucks! I am going to start packing my car tomorrow because my time is going to be short with this next week of work and school. Whewwww I am so ready to be done. I want to thank you and anyone else who reads this, I owe ya'll for my masters degree!
Bless you,
Lexy
Posted by Anakin on April 16, 2004, at 20:57:18
In reply to RE:: Hey lexy, posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 19:01:50
I had a lovely evening...
I was at school for 15 hours, a trip with 40 kids out to lunch, and a dance included, and right at the end two boys start fighting and I got punched in the head, for real. I am going to press charges if opportunity arises. I don't believe it was intentional, but in pulling them apart, it happened, or should I say, trying to pull them apart..KIDS TODAY can be very scary and have no respect for authority!!! WHAT A DAY! It was ridiculous!
Posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 21:12:13
In reply to middle school, posted by Anakin on April 16, 2004, at 20:57:18
Anakin!
Hell of a day, yuck! Open up a bottle of wine, make a hot bubble bath put on some good music and let it all fall away. Hope it gets better.
Lexy
Posted by trucker on April 16, 2004, at 22:06:42
In reply to Re: freaking about weight, posted by sexylexy on April 16, 2004, at 12:06:36
no water around and 45 miles from the nearest grocery sttoretrucker
///////////////////////////////////////
> Trucker,
> Have you ever tried water areobics or water walking. Your body is virtualy weighless and the water resistance gives you 8 times the impact. If you are embaressed to wear a swim suit, the woman I have seen do it many times wear shorts ect...just and idea to help your joints!!
> Lexy
Posted by trucker on April 16, 2004, at 22:08:01
In reply to Re: freaking about weight » sexylexy, posted by simus on April 16, 2004, at 12:16:53
what do you have ten vanity pounds/???
trucker/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
> > Have you ever tried water areobics or water walking. Your body is virtualy weighless and the water resistance gives you 8 times the impact.
>
> Great idea for me too right now! Thanks. But that stinking pride hasn't even let me buy a swimsuit in over 5 years. My body image was always soooo important when I was slender, and I was absolutely terrified of being fat. Strange how humbling life can be... =}
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