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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:23:26
In reply to RE: lexy » sexylexy, posted by wantinfo on March 20, 2004, at 11:21:40
Hey Em,
Well, all is getting better for me. It seems as though two of my friends were cheating on the test and were trying to involve me. Such drama, I feel like I am in junior high, not graduate school. Oh well, at least now everyone knows I am innocent. However, I am really proud of how I handled things, did not get over dramatic, did not cry ect, handle things as well as a really pissed of 24 year old girl would.
I am really glad that I went up to 15mg, it allowd me to start living again, not just survive. My doctor told me to go on up to 20mg to try to beat this thing so I did. Today is day 3 on 20mg and I seem to be doing pretty well. Have not really seen any side effects come back and am looking forward to beating this thing.
I feel a lot more like myself but still am lacking a lot of confident feelings and kinda of a wholeness that I used to have. I guess some of that will just come with time.
So glad to hear you are doing better. I think 10mg is overrated!
Good Bless you!!!
Lexy
Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
In reply to Thank you all, posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 0:04:17
Jlynne,
I think you bring up such an interesting topic. Altough there is not abuse in my history and honestly up to this point have had a fairy tale life, I have always been "the strong one", "a fighter" and "the one who's got it all together". In a way I am a touch of a control freak. I believe that is probably why even though I should have started meds back in october, I decided to wait till dec, allowing myself to worsen. I was scared the meds would take over too much the little that I still have control over. I believe too, that I am subconticously fighting the medication as well. I see how much it has helped me, I mean I am different person that I was in Dec. friends and family are realiing that I am coming back, which is nice. I feel like I have a ways to go to regain confidence, indepencance ect but I resent being on medication.
I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. I am more understanding of my clients (I am a therapist), more kind to people and less vain and prideful. All of these are good things that have come from this experience.
Now I want the day to come when I recognize myself and feel comfortable to face the world again. I still have a lot of fear that this is not over or that it is coming back. I just have to believe that along with my strong will, faith and medication I will get back to that place.
God Bless and good luck,
Lexy
Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:35:13
In reply to Re: Redirected Lexaproers » vandy, posted by Simus on March 19, 2004, at 23:17:25
Thanks!!!
No lie that is so funny ....... (lots of periods)
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 17:27:51
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
Hey Lexy..GREAT JOB!!! with that school situation you did a great job you are very wise for your 24yrs...you should be very proud of yourself...also glad to hear you are doing well on the 20mgs...Hope you continue...talk to you soon...Mystic
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 18:08:15
In reply to RE: jlynne, posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 6:28:40
>..I'm here for you and I hope that you have a great great day and obviously we are in the right place....Mystic
Thank you, Mystic, for being there for me. I know we are in the right place - that is for sure. I am really having a hard time today - pretty down. I ate a lot of sweets yesterday; hoping that's all it is. Right now I need to go out and shop for a house warming gift for my brother and sis-in-law. The party is tomorrow. I hope I survive the stores; you know how we all LOVE shopping! Talk to you later. ...jlynne
Posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by mystic on March 19, 2004, at 17:03:55
Hy Mystic, how are you today? i am a little down as i have noticed that the meds dont seem to be working anymore..:( i still will give it time. I got my computer working again, i have to reformat the harddrive to get rid of all those nasty virus the internet gives my poor PC.:P
i didnt choose Paxil over Lepraxo, my doctor just told me to start taking these until my first appt with my p-doc and i guess he put me on 5mg because its my first time on meds.i notice i get headaches on the weekends too, i had one yesterday morning and have one right now..i wonder why that is, and i had one last friday too.
it kinda sucks cause thats the only time i really get to spend with my boyfriend.
anyway have a goodnite and i hope you are feeling better now.
Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
In reply to Re: To everyone » Magdalena, posted by jlynne on March 19, 2004, at 0:23:45
Jlynne, you are the sweetest i swear. :) after reading your post i felt so much better knowing that someone out there cares, its just a comforting thought.
you know you are right i do have intimacy issues, i just never thought they were that bad. I dont know how i am going to sort through that. Everything with my boyfriend seems to be going well although im sure its far from a typical relationship he's ever had. (sometimes i feel bad for him) I bet he's never had a girlfriend before who hates to go to the movies and hates shopping (bad anxiety with both)and loves the outdoors, lol, oh well he hasnt uped and left yet (which surprises me)i guess maybe he really does like me.i am anticipating my first therapist, i dont know what thats going to be like, am i going to 'put on a show'? or am i really going to feel comfortable and open up?..im really hoping on the second one.
can i ask what your bad experience on the paxil was? you might have told me before but i honestly dont remember what it was.
thanks a lot for being you.
Magdalena
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 19:59:12
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
Hello Magdalena...You have gotten through another day and that is good...It definately takes time and you just need to be patient and that is something that we are not very good at...But if you are patient it will happen...When do you go and see the other dr?...Soon???...I think that you might want to up the dose a little and maybe that is what he will tell you to do...But be proud of yourself you have done very very well..and you will continue to do well until you are better which will be very soon or we will all stick by you if you need to try something else...I'm here for you...and dont forget it..!!!>..hope your night was good..and your headache went away...i didnt have a headache today that is a good thing...Mystic
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 20:02:41
In reply to Re: To everyone, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
Hey Magdalena...Dont forget driving and restaurants with the shopping and movies...mystic
Posted by Mrs. C on March 20, 2004, at 21:08:18
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
Magdelena, I hope you don't mind me responding to your post to Mystic. I just wanted to give you my support and let you know that I am thinking of you tonight. I know what it's like to feel like you will never get better. How long have you been on meds? Mrs. C
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
> I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. I am more understanding of my clients (I am a therapist), more kind to people and less vain and prideful. All of these are good things that have come from this experience.
You know, Lexy, you are so right. As hard as this battle has been, I wouldn't have gone back and changed a thing if I could. Because then I wouldn't be the person I am today.
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:16:22
In reply to Re: To everyone, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
> can i ask what your bad experience on the paxil was? you might have told me before but i honestly dont remember what it was.
>
> thanks a lot for being you.
> > MagdalenaMagdalena, if your boyfriend is smart, he will figure out how lucky he is to have found you:) The intimacy thing is a matter of trust; the more you trust the other person, the more intimacy you will allow with them.
It is good that you are cautious, because you are very vulnerable. But you are very strong, too. It takes a lot of courage to take the steps that you are taking, and you are willing to reach into unknown territory to find healing for that little girl you are protecting. I am excited at the possibilities that lie ahead for you.
As for my experience with Paxil, it was several years ago, and I really had a bad reaction to it. I experienced tremendous anxiety and irritability on it, and by the third day I felt like I was losing my mind. I couldn't function, and I really felt like I was in danger of seriously hurting someone. I had to stop taking it after the third day.
Some people just react extremely different than expected on some medications. And as I mentioned, this all happened very soon after I began taking it. You are doing fine on it - I can tell by your posts that you are feeling so much better now than your were in the beginning.
But, don't feel obligated to say that you are doing well, if you're not - ok? [Like most of us, you probably learned to get good strokes by being "a good little girl", eh?]
I, myself have been having a really hard day today; feeling pretty down. I am hoping that it is just because I ate too many sweets yesterday. Tomorrow will tell, I guess. I am going to my brother's house tomorrow for a housewarming. He and his wife live over near the ocean (Pacific) and it is a good three-hour drive from here. The drive will be good for me - it is a beautiful drive, and I enjoy driving (as long as I can hide behind my sunglasses:)
Well, I didn't plan on writing a book . . . sorry; I just got on a roll. Sleep well tonight, and have a peaceful tomorrow. ...jlynne
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:22:30
In reply to Re: Thank you all » sexylexy, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
You are such a kind, loving group. I have to ask a favor of you all.
Please go to Psycho-Babble under the thread "I've made a mess of my life" and read what SandyWeb wrote, and what the responses back to her were. I have asked her to please come to this site to write to all of you, but I am not sure if she will. Could any of you please try to find your way over there and help/encourage her? I would be greatly indebted.
Thank you in advance,
Simus
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:35:54
In reply to Re: Thank you all » sexylexy, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
Well, friends, it has been three days on Wellbutrin with NO Lexapro at all (still taking Xanax at night). I have to tell you I feel like a new person. The sun is shining again!!! I haven't felt like this in years! I cannot believe that I am the same person I was a week ago! I have had NO withdrawal effects from the Lexapro, and virtually no side effects from the Wellbutrin (I had a slight buzzing in my ear for a few seconds when I got up today, but that is so minor.) Now I know it is only the third day, and that is too soon to make any judgements. But at the very least, praise God, it was three days of feeling great as opposed to another three days of gloominess!
I don't want anyone to misinterpret my post. Lexapro may be the exact medicine for some of you, and Wellbutrin may be all wrong for you. My hope was just to share my victory to hopefully encourage you to hold on until yours comes!
God bless you all!!!
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:49:38
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
>> I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. > Lexy
Lexy, I know what you mean about becoming a better person, but the setbacks are a @#?!.I had a major breakdown in 1975 (I was 26yrs old and a single mother with 3 children ages 4, 5 and 6yrs). It took me years to recover from that exerience, and I did things during that time that I never thought I was capable of doing. Since then I honestly believe that anyone is capable of doing anything, given the right circumstances.
But, like you, I can say that I have become much more tolerant and understanding of others because of it, and I would not go back and become my former self for anything. I really feel like I went through some kind of metamorphosis(sp?).
I thought I was doing pretty well without meds, then last summer my husband of 17yrs decided to go through his mid-life crisis, and he left me for another (younger) woman. It has been a very difficult time for me, but I am looking forward to discovering a newer, stronger version of me.
The support I have found on this board has been unbelievable. Thanks for the post. ...jlynne
P.S. I am in the social services field; I work with the elderly. Sometimes they help me more than I help them!
Posted by jlynne on March 21, 2004, at 0:20:03
In reply to Please help!!!, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:22:30
> You are such a kind, loving group. I have to ask a favor of you all.
>
> Please go to Psycho-Babble under the thread "I've made a mess of my life" and read what SandyWeb wrote, and what the responses back to her were. I have asked her to please come to this site to write to all of you, but I am not sure if she will. Could any of you please try to find your way over there and help/encourage her? I would be greatly indebted.
>
> Thank you in advance,
>
> SimusSimus, thank you for calling this to our attention. I have submitted a post to SandyWeb; I hope she will find us. My heart aches for her. You are right that this is a very special group of people we have here. ...jlynne
Posted by Simus on March 21, 2004, at 0:27:56
In reply to Re: Please help!!! » Simus, posted by jlynne on March 21, 2004, at 0:20:03
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:35:45
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Mrs. C on March 20, 2004, at 21:08:18
Hey i didnt mind you responding at all, actually it made me happy, thank you so much for careing, my headache is still here but it isnt so bad n-e more. im just going to stay in tonite,
i have only been on my meds for 2 weeks so i guess its really too soon to think that it isnt going to work for me..i guess somtimes the pessimistic in me comes out.i hope your night went better than mine, how are you feeling today?
Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:41:19
In reply to Magdalena, posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:16:22
Thank you Jlynne and i hope your day goes well tomorrow too. So you like driving? guess what i drove today (ok dont laugh i dont have my lisence yet) i just never went for it, but my boyfriend let me drive his car aound my area today and taught me how to paralel(sp?) park haha it worked a few times..then i got fed up.:)
i wish i lived near the ocean all's we have here is the great lakes, which produce deformed fish (ok maybe it doesnt but i wouldnt be shocked). my dream is to one day live by the ocean.
Sweetdreams and i hope to hear from you when you get back.
:)Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:45:06
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 19:59:12
Mystic, the headache is still kicking but its not bothering me as much anymore, thanks for asking, yeah i am pretty sure they are gonna up my dose cause im not really feeling anything anymore..it could aslo be that i convince myself that i feel this way..these are things i think of when i am not feeling so good.
at least i dont work this weekend so im going to just chill back and try to enjoy it.
is there anything you do that makes you feel better? i find that playing guitar helps a bit but i think i need some lessons, im stuck playing the same 4 songs! lol
anyway sleep well, dream well and i will talk to you soon
Magdalena
Posted by Simus on March 21, 2004, at 4:18:06
In reply to Re: Magdalena, posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:41:19
> ...paralell park...haha it worked a few times..then i got fed up.:)
>
Don't worry. I have been driving for almost 30 years, and I still get fed up with trying to parallel park.> i wish i lived near the ocean all's we have here is the great lakes...
Really? I am from mid-Michigan? Are you close?
Posted by mystic on March 21, 2004, at 8:42:18
In reply to Update on Med Change, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:35:54
GREAT NEWS Simus...I'm very proud of you...You are soooo right Lex is not for everyone and there are soooo many things to chose from out there and obviously this one just might work for you..and that my friend is the best news..dont be afraid to take chances and get help in your recovery..I'm very happy for you..Talk to you soon..Mystic
Posted by SandyWeb on March 21, 2004, at 9:19:32
In reply to Please help!!!, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:22:30
Simus, you are such a sweet, sweet lady. Thank you for your concern, but I feel so bad that I've caused you to be upset. It's okay to let me go.
As you can see, I haven't taken that walk in the woods yet. *smile*
I don't really know what to say. I don't really have a lot of energy to type or think.
But I will be okay.
Thank you for the care you have shown towards me. You have a big ole heart!
Hugs,
Sandy
Posted by mystic on March 21, 2004, at 9:28:31
In reply to Re: Please help!!! » Simus, posted by SandyWeb on March 21, 2004, at 9:19:32
Welcome Sandy...It is good that you made your way to this room...Could you tell a little about yourself...Are you on lexapro or any meds right now...How can we help you???>>>are you in therapy???...Like I said in the other room...Depression is tricky and it makes you think that it will never get any better and that there is no way out...BUT THERE IS AND WE CAN TRY TO HELP...Please stay with us and let us help...A friend Mystic
Posted by SandyWeb on March 21, 2004, at 10:51:16
In reply to Re: Please help!!!, posted by mystic on March 21, 2004, at 9:28:31
Hi Mystic,
Thanks for taking the time. *smile*
I'm on:
Celexa 80mg
Neurontin 1600-3200mg (depending on the day)
Inderal LA 160mgI don't think that I'm depressed. I've just come to the end of my struggle. What I have been working towards for years has not been achieved, and there is no more time, money, stability, or energy to continue on with something else. I know myself, and it will not work.
So I feel dead. I'm not depressed. In fact, the Celexa is keeping my head above water so that I'm not sinking into that dark pit. I just have no decisions to make. There is nothing else left. And I don't really feel anything about that.
I'm not asking for help. Actually, I don't really know what I'm doing on here. Maybe just talking to hear myself speak. Who knows?
Thank you for being nice to me. (By the way, I'm a 38-year old with 2 children. I've been separated from hubby for MANY years because he was not exactly a "gentle" man.)
Take care. I wish you the best.
Hugs,
Sandy
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