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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 6:28:40
In reply to Re: Redirected Lexaproers » vandy, posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 0:11:46
Morning jlynne...I'm right here with ya...I feel the same way...sometimes when I have panic it is like there is something that makes me afraid deep inside of me and I think from my childhood all the way around an abusive mother (verbally controlling) and the other abuse there was little control and our little brains and feeling at that time when they are supposed to be determining how we react to the rest of our lives is somehow damaged...but I also believe that the meds will help with the anxiety and depression...your doing sooooooo goood...We just need to give ourselves a break and give it time..We will get through this and be happy that we did...GREAT BIG HUG...You forgave and that is great!!!!!....We all have our own issues to deal with and like I have said before this one is ours..I'm here for you and I hope that you have a great great day and obviously we are in the right place....Mystic
Posted by wantinfo on March 20, 2004, at 11:21:40
In reply to RE: lexy » mystic, posted by sexylexy on March 18, 2004, at 23:10:53
hey lexy...my therapist suggested i do the same thing. mark 5 times a day how i am feeling overall. i seem to notice patterns that help me figure out how to cope.
i am now on 15mg for about 1 and a half weeks. i dont like to say this bc i feel like im jinxing myself, but i feel somewhat better. how are you? congrats on the potential ring! EM
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 13:19:56
In reply to Redirected Lexaproers, posted by jlynne on March 13, 2004, at 1:31:16
Hello everyone how is everyone doing??...good I hope...EM you sounded good today just hang in there you are sounding really good and I noticed that when I was feeling better I started to try to help others out more and that is what you are doing...I am going shopping today for baby shower decorations for next weekend...it is only a week away now..and only 8 weeks until the baby gets her maybe..haha...Have been anxious lately think I have been worrying too much about my daughter and after the baby is born...with her eating disorder I just worry that she is going to go back to her habits...The weight that she has gained is beginning to bother her but she has done soooo well she has gained exactly what the dr has encouraged..But my problem and hoping that the meds help is thinking too far in the future...I worry about them dropping the baby or falling with the baby and I just obcess about all these things all the time...I just always think about the bad things that happen...because with me they usually do..Not that I'm complaining things could be a lot worse and I found all of you and the meds seem to be kicking in some people never get relief...so i'm going to try to be more positive...Thanks for listening hope everyone had a great day,...Mystic
Posted by wantinfo on March 20, 2004, at 15:01:07
In reply to RE::: Hello Everyone, posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 13:19:56
hey mystic...you sound pretty good also. i would try to worry about others less and try to fix yourself first...i feel like i'm qualified to give that advice since i constantly try to fix everyone else! you will be more helpful to your daughter when you are feeling better. are you on 15mgs yet? EM
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 15:44:25
In reply to RE::: Hello Everyone » mystic, posted by wantinfo on March 20, 2004, at 15:01:07
Hey EM...I didnt go up to 15 mgs yet wanted to wait until after the baby shower and I have been feeling ok...just have my rough spots..I'm also going into the delivery room with mel and her fiance and want to be ok for that...To tell the truth I am scared to do it and I really want 10mgs to work for now...and I have been feeling better just have my moments which seem to be circumstances...It is sometimes difficult to figure out what you are feeling from the meds and what you would feel anyway...I know that it is brought up a lot in the postings as blaming the meds for feelings that we have ...It is really easier for others to look at your posts and see that you are getting better than for you to think of yourself and think there has been little improvement...You have gotten better over the last week and you can tell from your posts..and like you I'm afraid to admit it in fear that it will go away....I'm happy that 15mgs is working for you and it will certainly be an option if I really need it....Hope that you continue to have a good day...A friend Mystic
Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:23:26
In reply to RE: lexy » sexylexy, posted by wantinfo on March 20, 2004, at 11:21:40
Hey Em,
Well, all is getting better for me. It seems as though two of my friends were cheating on the test and were trying to involve me. Such drama, I feel like I am in junior high, not graduate school. Oh well, at least now everyone knows I am innocent. However, I am really proud of how I handled things, did not get over dramatic, did not cry ect, handle things as well as a really pissed of 24 year old girl would.
I am really glad that I went up to 15mg, it allowd me to start living again, not just survive. My doctor told me to go on up to 20mg to try to beat this thing so I did. Today is day 3 on 20mg and I seem to be doing pretty well. Have not really seen any side effects come back and am looking forward to beating this thing.
I feel a lot more like myself but still am lacking a lot of confident feelings and kinda of a wholeness that I used to have. I guess some of that will just come with time.
So glad to hear you are doing better. I think 10mg is overrated!
Good Bless you!!!
Lexy
Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
In reply to Thank you all, posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 0:04:17
Jlynne,
I think you bring up such an interesting topic. Altough there is not abuse in my history and honestly up to this point have had a fairy tale life, I have always been "the strong one", "a fighter" and "the one who's got it all together". In a way I am a touch of a control freak. I believe that is probably why even though I should have started meds back in october, I decided to wait till dec, allowing myself to worsen. I was scared the meds would take over too much the little that I still have control over. I believe too, that I am subconticously fighting the medication as well. I see how much it has helped me, I mean I am different person that I was in Dec. friends and family are realiing that I am coming back, which is nice. I feel like I have a ways to go to regain confidence, indepencance ect but I resent being on medication.
I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. I am more understanding of my clients (I am a therapist), more kind to people and less vain and prideful. All of these are good things that have come from this experience.
Now I want the day to come when I recognize myself and feel comfortable to face the world again. I still have a lot of fear that this is not over or that it is coming back. I just have to believe that along with my strong will, faith and medication I will get back to that place.
God Bless and good luck,
Lexy
Posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:35:13
In reply to Re: Redirected Lexaproers » vandy, posted by Simus on March 19, 2004, at 23:17:25
Thanks!!!
No lie that is so funny ....... (lots of periods)
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 17:27:51
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
Hey Lexy..GREAT JOB!!! with that school situation you did a great job you are very wise for your 24yrs...you should be very proud of yourself...also glad to hear you are doing well on the 20mgs...Hope you continue...talk to you soon...Mystic
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 18:08:15
In reply to RE: jlynne, posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 6:28:40
>..I'm here for you and I hope that you have a great great day and obviously we are in the right place....Mystic
Thank you, Mystic, for being there for me. I know we are in the right place - that is for sure. I am really having a hard time today - pretty down. I ate a lot of sweets yesterday; hoping that's all it is. Right now I need to go out and shop for a house warming gift for my brother and sis-in-law. The party is tomorrow. I hope I survive the stores; you know how we all LOVE shopping! Talk to you later. ...jlynne
Posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by mystic on March 19, 2004, at 17:03:55
Hy Mystic, how are you today? i am a little down as i have noticed that the meds dont seem to be working anymore..:( i still will give it time. I got my computer working again, i have to reformat the harddrive to get rid of all those nasty virus the internet gives my poor PC.:P
i didnt choose Paxil over Lepraxo, my doctor just told me to start taking these until my first appt with my p-doc and i guess he put me on 5mg because its my first time on meds.i notice i get headaches on the weekends too, i had one yesterday morning and have one right now..i wonder why that is, and i had one last friday too.
it kinda sucks cause thats the only time i really get to spend with my boyfriend.
anyway have a goodnite and i hope you are feeling better now.
Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
In reply to Re: To everyone » Magdalena, posted by jlynne on March 19, 2004, at 0:23:45
Jlynne, you are the sweetest i swear. :) after reading your post i felt so much better knowing that someone out there cares, its just a comforting thought.
you know you are right i do have intimacy issues, i just never thought they were that bad. I dont know how i am going to sort through that. Everything with my boyfriend seems to be going well although im sure its far from a typical relationship he's ever had. (sometimes i feel bad for him) I bet he's never had a girlfriend before who hates to go to the movies and hates shopping (bad anxiety with both)and loves the outdoors, lol, oh well he hasnt uped and left yet (which surprises me)i guess maybe he really does like me.i am anticipating my first therapist, i dont know what thats going to be like, am i going to 'put on a show'? or am i really going to feel comfortable and open up?..im really hoping on the second one.
can i ask what your bad experience on the paxil was? you might have told me before but i honestly dont remember what it was.
thanks a lot for being you.
Magdalena
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 19:59:12
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
Hello Magdalena...You have gotten through another day and that is good...It definately takes time and you just need to be patient and that is something that we are not very good at...But if you are patient it will happen...When do you go and see the other dr?...Soon???...I think that you might want to up the dose a little and maybe that is what he will tell you to do...But be proud of yourself you have done very very well..and you will continue to do well until you are better which will be very soon or we will all stick by you if you need to try something else...I'm here for you...and dont forget it..!!!>..hope your night was good..and your headache went away...i didnt have a headache today that is a good thing...Mystic
Posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 20:02:41
In reply to Re: To everyone, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
Hey Magdalena...Dont forget driving and restaurants with the shopping and movies...mystic
Posted by Mrs. C on March 20, 2004, at 21:08:18
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:18:10
Magdelena, I hope you don't mind me responding to your post to Mystic. I just wanted to give you my support and let you know that I am thinking of you tonight. I know what it's like to feel like you will never get better. How long have you been on meds? Mrs. C
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
> I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. I am more understanding of my clients (I am a therapist), more kind to people and less vain and prideful. All of these are good things that have come from this experience.
You know, Lexy, you are so right. As hard as this battle has been, I wouldn't have gone back and changed a thing if I could. Because then I wouldn't be the person I am today.
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:16:22
In reply to Re: To everyone, posted by Magdalena on March 20, 2004, at 19:28:14
> can i ask what your bad experience on the paxil was? you might have told me before but i honestly dont remember what it was.
>
> thanks a lot for being you.
> > MagdalenaMagdalena, if your boyfriend is smart, he will figure out how lucky he is to have found you:) The intimacy thing is a matter of trust; the more you trust the other person, the more intimacy you will allow with them.
It is good that you are cautious, because you are very vulnerable. But you are very strong, too. It takes a lot of courage to take the steps that you are taking, and you are willing to reach into unknown territory to find healing for that little girl you are protecting. I am excited at the possibilities that lie ahead for you.
As for my experience with Paxil, it was several years ago, and I really had a bad reaction to it. I experienced tremendous anxiety and irritability on it, and by the third day I felt like I was losing my mind. I couldn't function, and I really felt like I was in danger of seriously hurting someone. I had to stop taking it after the third day.
Some people just react extremely different than expected on some medications. And as I mentioned, this all happened very soon after I began taking it. You are doing fine on it - I can tell by your posts that you are feeling so much better now than your were in the beginning.
But, don't feel obligated to say that you are doing well, if you're not - ok? [Like most of us, you probably learned to get good strokes by being "a good little girl", eh?]
I, myself have been having a really hard day today; feeling pretty down. I am hoping that it is just because I ate too many sweets yesterday. Tomorrow will tell, I guess. I am going to my brother's house tomorrow for a housewarming. He and his wife live over near the ocean (Pacific) and it is a good three-hour drive from here. The drive will be good for me - it is a beautiful drive, and I enjoy driving (as long as I can hide behind my sunglasses:)
Well, I didn't plan on writing a book . . . sorry; I just got on a roll. Sleep well tonight, and have a peaceful tomorrow. ...jlynne
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:22:30
In reply to Re: Thank you all » sexylexy, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
You are such a kind, loving group. I have to ask a favor of you all.
Please go to Psycho-Babble under the thread "I've made a mess of my life" and read what SandyWeb wrote, and what the responses back to her were. I have asked her to please come to this site to write to all of you, but I am not sure if she will. Could any of you please try to find your way over there and help/encourage her? I would be greatly indebted.
Thank you in advance,
Simus
Posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:35:54
In reply to Re: Thank you all » sexylexy, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 22:51:19
Well, friends, it has been three days on Wellbutrin with NO Lexapro at all (still taking Xanax at night). I have to tell you I feel like a new person. The sun is shining again!!! I haven't felt like this in years! I cannot believe that I am the same person I was a week ago! I have had NO withdrawal effects from the Lexapro, and virtually no side effects from the Wellbutrin (I had a slight buzzing in my ear for a few seconds when I got up today, but that is so minor.) Now I know it is only the third day, and that is too soon to make any judgements. But at the very least, praise God, it was three days of feeling great as opposed to another three days of gloominess!
I don't want anyone to misinterpret my post. Lexapro may be the exact medicine for some of you, and Wellbutrin may be all wrong for you. My hope was just to share my victory to hopefully encourage you to hold on until yours comes!
God bless you all!!!
Posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:49:38
In reply to Re: Thank you all, posted by sexylexy on March 20, 2004, at 16:34:15
>> I have come to terms now that God is allowing me this experience because it truly has made me a better person. > Lexy
Lexy, I know what you mean about becoming a better person, but the setbacks are a @#?!.I had a major breakdown in 1975 (I was 26yrs old and a single mother with 3 children ages 4, 5 and 6yrs). It took me years to recover from that exerience, and I did things during that time that I never thought I was capable of doing. Since then I honestly believe that anyone is capable of doing anything, given the right circumstances.
But, like you, I can say that I have become much more tolerant and understanding of others because of it, and I would not go back and become my former self for anything. I really feel like I went through some kind of metamorphosis(sp?).
I thought I was doing pretty well without meds, then last summer my husband of 17yrs decided to go through his mid-life crisis, and he left me for another (younger) woman. It has been a very difficult time for me, but I am looking forward to discovering a newer, stronger version of me.
The support I have found on this board has been unbelievable. Thanks for the post. ...jlynne
P.S. I am in the social services field; I work with the elderly. Sometimes they help me more than I help them!
Posted by jlynne on March 21, 2004, at 0:20:03
In reply to Please help!!!, posted by Simus on March 20, 2004, at 23:22:30
> You are such a kind, loving group. I have to ask a favor of you all.
>
> Please go to Psycho-Babble under the thread "I've made a mess of my life" and read what SandyWeb wrote, and what the responses back to her were. I have asked her to please come to this site to write to all of you, but I am not sure if she will. Could any of you please try to find your way over there and help/encourage her? I would be greatly indebted.
>
> Thank you in advance,
>
> SimusSimus, thank you for calling this to our attention. I have submitted a post to SandyWeb; I hope she will find us. My heart aches for her. You are right that this is a very special group of people we have here. ...jlynne
Posted by Simus on March 21, 2004, at 0:27:56
In reply to Re: Please help!!! » Simus, posted by jlynne on March 21, 2004, at 0:20:03
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:35:45
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by Mrs. C on March 20, 2004, at 21:08:18
Hey i didnt mind you responding at all, actually it made me happy, thank you so much for careing, my headache is still here but it isnt so bad n-e more. im just going to stay in tonite,
i have only been on my meds for 2 weeks so i guess its really too soon to think that it isnt going to work for me..i guess somtimes the pessimistic in me comes out.i hope your night went better than mine, how are you feeling today?
Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:41:19
In reply to Magdalena, posted by jlynne on March 20, 2004, at 23:16:22
Thank you Jlynne and i hope your day goes well tomorrow too. So you like driving? guess what i drove today (ok dont laugh i dont have my lisence yet) i just never went for it, but my boyfriend let me drive his car aound my area today and taught me how to paralel(sp?) park haha it worked a few times..then i got fed up.:)
i wish i lived near the ocean all's we have here is the great lakes, which produce deformed fish (ok maybe it doesnt but i wouldnt be shocked). my dream is to one day live by the ocean.
Sweetdreams and i hope to hear from you when you get back.
:)Magdalena
Posted by Magdalena on March 21, 2004, at 0:45:06
In reply to RE: magdalena, posted by mystic on March 20, 2004, at 19:59:12
Mystic, the headache is still kicking but its not bothering me as much anymore, thanks for asking, yeah i am pretty sure they are gonna up my dose cause im not really feeling anything anymore..it could aslo be that i convince myself that i feel this way..these are things i think of when i am not feeling so good.
at least i dont work this weekend so im going to just chill back and try to enjoy it.
is there anything you do that makes you feel better? i find that playing guitar helps a bit but i think i need some lessons, im stuck playing the same 4 songs! lol
anyway sleep well, dream well and i will talk to you soon
Magdalena
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