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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 443 to 467 of 536. Go back in thread:
Posted by gardenergirl on May 23, 2005, at 20:29:18
In reply to Re: Small boards - Dr Bob » gardenergirl, posted by alexandra_k on May 23, 2005, at 19:28:32
I really don't know. I can't put myself in the place of wanting to read and maybe join, so I have no idea, sorry.
gg
Posted by Nikkit2 on May 24, 2005, at 4:30:00
In reply to Re: Small boards » alexandra_k, posted by gardenergirl on May 23, 2005, at 20:29:18
The only reason I would like the small boards is for somewhere I can once again talk openly.
I don't think I really care though.. I think all my care for this place is leaking out. theres, maybe, half a dozen people here that I would *hate* to lose touch with.. but unfortunately I can't face have my words completely misunderstood anymore..
I try to post help, I can get critised.. I post in pain, and my words get bought to admin to picked over like some roadside carion..
is it actually worth it anymore?
A "small board" would give me some safety. Somewhere I would know the people I was posting to much better, and not have to worry how 3000 other people might misconstrue my words.
Actually, today, I am growing to really dislike this place.
Posted by Minnie-Haha on May 24, 2005, at 16:26:21
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » partlycloudy, posted by Dinah on May 23, 2005, at 9:24:16
> ... given that small boards are a given, which Dr. Bob has told us they are, wouldn't it be better if they were also private?
>
> That way they'd be more like IM's or Babblemails or any number of the other private off board contacts that already take place. And there wouldn't be the feeling of pressing your nose against a window you can't breach, watching friends enjoy conversations you are not free to join, and knowing they like it that way...I was so the outsider in junior high and high school, so I think I understand your reluctance to have private groups. And though some might like feeling exclusive, I don't think that's what this is all about.
The Psycho-Babble community has grown to the point where some feel lost, or left out, or bullied... or whatever. I can't keep track of but about a dozen people myself. It's like trying to feel cozy at a huge convention. Some must have thought "Wouldn't it be nice if we could have a forum like this, that was smaller (again)?"
This site is strange because it's private in one respect: you have to register to post. But it's very public in other respects: you don't have to be registered to read the posts, and in fact you can Google and find all sorts of interesting stuff. Even find out about people with real names (for those who don't have anonymous names or "handles" or whatever you call them).
One month ago, I tried to start a Yahoo group for Psycho-Babble women -- a complement to the PB boards. You had to apply to join (send an email sharing your PB name) and the posts were all private. The only things public were the links, which all members could update. My gosh, you'd think I'd committed a crime. I thought it might be a more intimate group for lady Babblers, but the idea was received like a joke, or maybe a threat. (Though some joined and we had a few good threads: menopause, beauty products, stuff like that. Thanks ladies.)
> So that's my limited aim. Since Dr. Bob is going to go ahead with something I think is not such a good idea, it at least seems acceptable if he identifies what is public and what is private.
I haven't really made up my mind yet about whether or not such boards, when and if they do arrive, should be public or private. But I don't think it's traitorous for some to want them, just inevitable.
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:04:05
In reply to For me.., posted by Nikkit2 on May 24, 2005, at 4:30:00
Ah Nikki. That was rotten timing. The criticism I mean.
Most people on the board appreciate your input. In any given situation, most is about as much as you can hope for.
Was it Lincoln who said you can please some Babblers all of the time, and all Babblers some of the time (I actually don't think pleasing all Babblers is possible any of the time - excuse me Mr. Lincoln), but you can't please all Babblers all of the time?
I figure if there's only a minority of people who detest me, I'm doing pretty good. (A lot better than I've done in the past at any rate. grin.)
I can understand the desire to have private conversations. I babblemail, go to Open, and conference. I'm just not sure what good it would do to make it visible to people who weren't able to be part of the conversation.
So while we may come to the same conclusion by different means, we end up at the same conclusion, right?
The small boards, if implemented, should be visible to only those registered to post on them.
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:06:48
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members???, posted by Minnie-Haha on May 24, 2005, at 16:26:21
It is inevitable that some people want smaller environments. Some entire groups have moved themselves to other formats when they've gotten angry with Dr. Bob or another poster.
But what would be the possible benefits of making the posts of a private conversation public?
Posted by JahL on May 24, 2005, at 17:26:02
In reply to For me.., posted by Nikkit2 on May 24, 2005, at 4:30:00
Hi Nikki.
FWIW I do understand.
You, like me, are perhaps apt to speak your mind and unfortunately there is always going to be the odd poster who sees the opportunity for an argument. I was perhaps one of those people once; I would jump all over anyone trying to sell me psychotherapy. I'd like to think I've calmed down a bit since then...
An illustration; even though noone other than Scott really converses with me on the 2000 board, I had to post there recently because someone was on my case (I was disnissed as 'Mr Dopehead' because I choose to smoke MJ) and I was fit to flip. I have a real temper on me and my next post would've got me blocked.
As you say, there's nothing worse than having your heartfelt posts picked apart for no good reason other than someone's got too much time on their hands and is spoiling for a fight.
So I do understand. If people want small groups badly enough then I guess they'll happen.
Take care,
Jah.
> .... but unfortunately I can't face have my words completely misunderstood anymore..
>
> I try to post help, I can get critised.. I post in pain, and my words get bought to admin to picked over like some roadside carion..
>
Posted by Minnie-Haha on May 24, 2005, at 17:36:27
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » Minnie-Haha, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:06:48
> It is inevitable that some people want smaller environments. Some entire groups have moved themselves to other formats when they've gotten angry with Dr. Bob or another poster.
Sometimes it not anger though. For instance, in my case I wanted to talk to other women Babblers. I actually would have encouraged the women's group members to go to Psycho-Babble to discuss meds, psychotherapy, stuff like that (unless they were so uncomfortable doing that as to be painful).
> But what would be the possible benefits of making the posts of a private conversation public?
I can think of a few, though maybe some have come up before. One might be to make the posts searchable, just like they are now. Another might be to assure other Babblers that they aren't being talked about. A third might be technical; maybe private groups would be hard for Dr. Bob to set up and/or administer in the current environment. And I'm sure this has come up before, but if they're private, then will Dr. Bob still lay down the law, so to speak, or will the members police themselves? If they police themselves, the doctor will give up some of his authority. He's a nice guy and all, but sometimes it's hard to let go. And maybe he shouldn't for liability reasons. (Look what you let happen under your very nose!)
Like I said though, I haven't made up my mind on this yet. I do feel bad that it's causing you and others so much pain. Some of you have a lot more emotional capital invested in the site than I. It seems almost like you're already grieving for the way it used to be.
Posted by JahL on May 24, 2005, at 17:42:16
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » JahL, posted by Dinah on May 23, 2005, at 17:30:13
> Well, I have to confess I'd like to chat with some people with 2000 who rarely venture off. I'd like to get to know you better.
Why thank you. Ditto. It's obvious to me you care deeply about this site. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that w/o PB I probably wouldn't be here today. I learnt how to self medicate here (I know Dr B disapproves, outwardly at least) and that's what's enabled me to at least function adequately and keep the gun in the cabinet.
> ...join me wherever you see me. :) Which on my more prolific days should be just about anywhere. lol.I've noticed! ;-)
J.
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:44:25
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » Dinah, posted by JahL on May 24, 2005, at 17:42:16
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:52:17
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members???, posted by Minnie-Haha on May 24, 2005, at 17:36:27
> Sometimes it not anger though.
Agreed.
>
> > But what would be the possible benefits of making the posts of a private conversation public?
>
> I can think of a few, though maybe some have come up before. One might be to make the posts searchable, just like they are now.The main benefit of searchable posts is for information, right? I would assume that if someone was looking for information, he/she would probably post on the medication page, or appropriate page. Unless you happened to have an expert in the small group.
> Another might be to assure other Babblers that they aren't being talked about.
I would assume that Dr. Bob would police the small boards with at least as much vigor as he does the larger boards. I trust him. Besides, if people want to talk about me, they probably can and do in babblemail etc. And hopefully they'd have something better to talk about.
> A third might be technical; maybe private groups would be hard for Dr. Bob to set up and/or administer in the current environment.
I'm sure Dr. Bob would enjoy tackling whatever technical challenge making private conversations private would entail. He managed Babblemail.
> And I'm sure this has come up before, but if they're private, then will Dr. Bob still lay down the law, so to speak, or will the members police themselves? If they police themselves, the doctor will give up some of his authority. He's a nice guy and all, but sometimes it's hard to let go. And maybe he shouldn't for liability reasons. (Look what you let happen under your very nose!)
I would hope that he would uphold the same standards he upholds everywhere.
>
> Like I said though, I haven't made up my mind on this yet. I do feel bad that it's causing you and others so much pain. Some of you have a lot more emotional capital invested in the site than I. It seems almost like you're already grieving for the way it used to be.
>
Not all objections are based on nostalgia any more than all splinter groups result from anger. :)
Posted by Minnie-Haha on May 24, 2005, at 18:36:43
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members???, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:52:17
> > I can think of a few, though maybe some have come up before. One might be to make the posts searchable, just like they are now.
>
> The main benefit of searchable posts is for information, right? I would assume that if someone was looking for information, he/she would probably post on the medication page, or appropriate page. Unless you happened to have an expert in the small group.Well, I just did a search on the Dr-Bob site on "effexor." I found posts on these boards: Medication, Withdrawal, Alternative, Eating, Faith, Grief, Health, Newbies, Psychology, Social, Substance Use, Writing, and 2000. You never know where people will talk about things.
> > Another might be to assure other Babblers that they aren't being talked about.
>
> I would assume that Dr. Bob would police the small boards with at least as much vigor as he does the larger boards. I trust him. Besides, if people want to talk about me, they probably can and do in babblemail etc. And hopefully they'd have something better to talk about.OK. That covers that reason, though maybe some would like to see with their own eyes that the private group is behaving. That would cut down on Bob having to defend himself on some "conspiracy" charges too. (I'm not saying they're justified, but sometimes people get upset and accuse him of being something like a despot.)
> > A third might be technical; maybe private groups would be hard for Dr. Bob to set up and/or administer in the current environment.
>
> I'm sure Dr. Bob would enjoy tackling whatever technical challenge making private conversations private would entail. He managed Babblemail.OK. Though there might be constraints that he has no control over. But I'll give you that.
> > And I'm sure this has come up before, but if they're private, then will Dr. Bob still lay down the law, so to speak, or will the members police themselves? If they police themselves, the doctor will give up some of his authority. He's a nice guy and all, but sometimes it's hard to let go. And maybe he shouldn't for liability reasons. (Look what you let happen under your very nose!)
>
> I would hope that he would uphold the same standards he upholds everywhere.Has it been decided that he personally would oversee civility on the private groups? If so, I'll give you that too.
> > Like I said though, I haven't made up my mind on this yet. I do feel bad that it's causing you and others so much pain. Some of you have a lot more emotional capital invested in the site than I. It seems almost like you're already grieving for the way it used to be.
> >
> Not all objections are based on nostalgia any more than all splinter groups result from anger. :)You're right, and I'm sorry if my remark sounded that way.
Posted by alexandra_k on May 24, 2005, at 20:45:38
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » Minnie-Haha, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 17:06:48
> But what would be the possible benefits of making the posts of a private conversation public?
How would you decide whether you wanted to join or not if you couldn't read the posts / see the threads???
I think that was the main concern.
Hence:
1) A new indicator on the link so that Babblers can see how active the board is.
2) And / Or all or part of the title of the newest thread so that people who are thinking of joining can see the sorts of things that are discussed over there (and to make the levels of activity more apparant)
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 20:49:11
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » Dinah, posted by alexandra_k on May 24, 2005, at 20:45:38
How about just a brief statement of purpose, and a count of # posts in the last xxx days.
Posted by Toph on May 24, 2005, at 23:32:21
In reply to Re: Small boards - only viewable by members??? » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 20:49:11
I hope I'm not way off base here but these small boards, gated communities, private clubs, whatever, will the members have the authority to expell a member they don't like or block from the board an offending member who is uncivil, for example?
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 23:57:14
In reply to Re: Small boards, posted by Toph on May 24, 2005, at 23:32:21
Don't think so.
I think potential posters can vote in a popularity contest by deciding which group they want to join on the basis of who is already a member, but already existing members can not vote in a popularity contest by refusing to admit, or by expelling potential or current members.
Or that was my understanding at last count.
Dr. Bob could still block.
Posted by Toph on May 25, 2005, at 0:09:19
In reply to Re: Small boards » Toph, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 23:57:14
Posted by alexandra_k on May 25, 2005, at 3:29:10
In reply to Re: Small boards » Toph, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 23:57:14
> I think potential posters can vote in a popularity contest by deciding which group they want to join on the basis of who is already a member,
So then you would want a list of all the members of a board available to non-members?
I mean, if you can't view the threads as a non-member, then how are you going to be able to see the posting names on the threads?
That would be additional information from a 'new' indicator...
Posted by Dinah on May 25, 2005, at 5:33:37
In reply to Re: Small boards » Dinah, posted by alexandra_k on May 25, 2005, at 3:29:10
I was telling Toph what I believed was the last thing Dr. Bob said about how it *will* work, not my druthers.
Posted by AuntieMel on May 25, 2005, at 8:59:11
In reply to Kinda like Gore-Tex (nm) » Dinah, posted by Toph on May 25, 2005, at 0:09:19
Posted by gardenergirl on May 25, 2005, at 11:46:39
In reply to Re: Small boards » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on May 25, 2005, at 5:33:37
:)
gg
Posted by gardenergirl on May 25, 2005, at 11:47:32
In reply to Yeah, I had to think about that one for a minute. » Dinah, posted by gardenergirl on May 25, 2005, at 11:46:39
Posted by Dr. Bob on May 26, 2005, at 2:23:57
In reply to Re: Small boards » Dinah, posted by alexandra_k on May 25, 2005, at 3:29:10
> it is inevitable that some group members will fall into the comfort zone of their own board and neglect the main boards.
>
> JahI think if they'd be more comfortable on a smaller board, then it would be nice to be able to offer them that alternative...
--
> I don't really see the point if they are public, although I guess you would at least know that if you posted something, only X number of people could possibly respond.
That would be the point, there would be a smaller number of people interacting.
> I do NOT want to be someone with my nose pressed up to the glass wishing I were part of a group. And I WILL NOT be inside the window seeing the nose prints and wondering who stopped by.
>
> ggYou wouldn't need to press your nose up, you could just keep walking... And you could focus on who's inside instead of who's outside (as tends to happen in rooms with one-way mirrors)...
--
> that's what's enabled me to ... keep the gun in the cabinet.
>
> J.I'm glad it's in the cabinet, but what about giving it to someone else instead?
--
> > > what would be the possible benefits of making the posts of a private conversation public?
> >
> > One might be to make the posts searchable, just like they are now.
>
> The main benefit of searchable posts is for information, right? I would assume that if someone was looking for information, he/she would probably post on the medication page, or appropriate page.
>
> DinahIf the poster was looking for information, it might be better for them to post on an open board. But they might be looking for support and others for information...
--
> 1) A new indicator on the link so that Babblers can see how active the board is.
>
> 2) And / Or all or part of the title of the newest thread
>
> alexandra_k> [3] How about just a brief statement of purpose, and a count of # posts in the last xxx days.
>
> Dinah> [4] a list of all the members of a board
>
> alexandra_kI think the activity level and a list of the members would be the most helpful. Since titles might not be very informative and statements of purpose might be vague...
Bob
Posted by TamaraJ on May 26, 2005, at 14:06:06
In reply to Re: Small boards, posted by Dr. Bob on May 26, 2005, at 2:23:57
You know, Dr. Bob, I really just don't know how much of an appetite there really would be for small, limited participation/membership boards. I have said it before, and perhaps I am talking out of the wrong side of my anatomy, but I think that those who are going to "join in" will do so, but creating a cozier and perhaps a less intimating atmosphere won't necessarily persuade others to be more active. The 2000 board serves a unique purpose, and is a nice forum for the babble "pioneers" if you will. But, I don't feel slighted or shut out because I can't post there.
If the small boards do become a reality, I personally think that establishing topics for discussion or specific themes (more narrow than just "Social" or "Relationships") would make the concept a bit more palatable. Now, I don't want to be presumptious, but, Dr. Bob, I don't think you have completely made up your mind about the utility of small boards and whether it is truly in the best interest of the babble community to establish these forums. But, I am not a mind-reader, so I will leave it to you and others to continue the discussion.
Just my two cents.
Tamara
Posted by justyourlaugh on May 26, 2005, at 23:18:03
In reply to Re: Small boards, posted by Dr. Bob on May 26, 2005, at 2:23:57
to kid us..
i will drop out..drop off ...if you felt this was the way to go..how many lurkers would love to jump in? and do and still feel unwelcome?..
not my cup of tea...
Posted by Dr. Bob on May 28, 2005, at 10:14:53
In reply to try not.., posted by justyourlaugh on May 26, 2005, at 23:18:03
> how many lurkers would love to jump in? and do and still feel unwelcome?..
I don't know, but maybe people would be more likely to feel welcome at boards that weren't so busy?
Bob
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